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| | #1 |
| Advanced Warrior War Room Member Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Frederick, Maryland, USA.
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I've been working on a site for a client, I've concentrated on the distribution/ delivery SEO etc but I'm at a loss as how to make this service "Sexy". The product is commercial cleaning/ janitorial service. I did come up with an angle of calling it "outsourcing" because the janitor company does clean a major restaurant chain in 6 states and my client would lke more restaurants... but what could I use as a call to action? How does one "call to action" a boring topic? I'm dead sure there are lots of talented copywriters who've made a sow's ear into a silk purse... I'm not sure I'm one of those or maybe I'm just burned out on the research going into plugins and keywords and checking competitive serps any ideas on how to make a call to action for a janitor company? thanks |
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David Bruce Jr of Frederick Web Promotions Google Places Ranking Improved | Plastic Surgery Cincinnati | |
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| | #2 |
| Platinum Warrior Member War Room Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: AU
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Here are a few ideas: Are You Ready to Let Us Go Where You Don't Want To Hire Us Now Ready To Let Us Take The Plunge For You? Buy Now We'll Do What You Don't Want To Hire Us Today |
| How To Explode Your Online Income x 67 Times! You Are About to Experience the VIRAL EFFECT!!! Get Your Ad Sent to 250,000 People RIGHT HERE Who The Heck Else Wants 10,000 FREE Top Banner Impressions? | |
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| | #3 |
| Warrior Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Utah
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Hi David, I've been doing a TON of writing trying to promote this or that and a lot of topics run dry - so to speak! I like what dave147 wrote - but I think even further, show the potential customer what the benefits are from using the service in the first place! Something like... Janitorial Service is a dirty job but somebodies got to do it and we're the ones to take care of it! or We're not afraid of Dirt - we can clean anywhere, anytime! or Do you have a need for clean - we're the ones that can provide that service! or even No need to worry - we've got the service to impress even the most critical of bosses! I hope that helps, Ron |
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| | #4 |
| Advanced Warrior War Room Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: Malaga Spain.
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David Does It have to be sexy can't you say something like "We are prepared to clean what you don't want to" or "let us clean what you can't or won't" I have written many articles for cleaning companies mostly carpet cleaners and it is a legitimate service that a lot of people want to pay for. "Let us put the shine on your business"or gloss or something like that. La dominatrix |
| http://www.catherineford.com http://www.catherinefordimreviews.com "A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral". ........Antoine de Saint-Exupery | |
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| | #5 |
| Copywriter / Marketer War Room Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Toronto, Canada
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Hi David, First we need to define what a true "call to action" is. A call to action is, you've already gone through the steps of getting your prospect to desire your service, you've got them all excited about what you have to offer. Then you need them to take action. The responses you have got so far are "headlines", or an attempt to get people to desire your service. That being said, if you want a real call to action for your service you can offer them money off or a bonus for responding by a certain date. You say that the janitorial company does chains of restaurants in different states, offer a some kind of "deal" for large contracts. But the best for you would be the bonus for responding by a dead line date. Take care, Bill Jeffels |
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| | #6 |
| HyperActive Warrior War Room Member Join Date: Nov 2008
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A lot of what's been written so far have been throw away lines and catchy slogans. What you need is to uncover what your prospects REALLY want. For example, do they want their toilets cleaned, or do they want more free time away from the office to go drinking with their mates? Do they want their windows cleaned or do they want to impress their clients? What are the current frustrations your prospects have with their cleaning services and how do you solve them? In your sales copy you should have addressed the benefits you'll deliver to the prospects. You should also have addressed the inner desires, frustrations, worries and dreams your prospects have, and told them how you'll help them. I've never looked at Joe Polish's courses, and I dont know if he taught commercial cleaning or just domestic cleaning, but it might pay to check out how he went about it in his carpet cleaning business. PS Do you have an amazing offer for your clients? How about a free audit of how they can save money on their cleaning services? |
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| | #7 |
| Advanced Warrior War Room Member Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Frederick, Maryland, USA.
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Many thanks to all of the replies, and thank you Bill Jeffels for defining for me (and us) the difference between "call to action" and "catchy slogan". I needed that clarified as I'd not made that distinction AND I also needed the ideas for catchy slogans as those make for social bookmarking mini post titles! And thank you Hugh Tyler for these gems: What you need is to uncover what your prospects REALLY want. For example, do they want their toilets cleaned, or do they want more free time away from the office to go drinking with their mates? <li>Do they want their windows cleaned or do they want to impress their clients?</li> <li>What are the current frustrations your prospects have with their cleaning services and how do you solve them?</li> I especially like that last one... I'm sure my clients prospects are only looking for another janitorial service because the last one failed them in one way or another. I'd not thought of these and all of your gracious responses will give me ideas on how best to promote my client. The client's current site is Commercial Cleaning Janitorial Service Hugh, I subbed to your ezine btw |
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David Bruce Jr of Frederick Web Promotions Google Places Ranking Improved | Plastic Surgery Cincinnati | |
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| | #8 | |
| Aka: John J. Adams War Room Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Windsor, ON
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I don't know the psychology of this but people that have been slighted are looking for a better business "relationship" and open themselves up to new solutions perhaps more than they should. Perhaps you should look up the statistics on cleaning company turn over, research WHY they turn over and direct your copy to that. | |
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| | #9 | |
| Advanced Warrior War Room Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Escondido, CA. Becase San Marcos just wasn't hot enough.
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Sometimes, people are simply willing to switch service providers to save money. Cleaning services could easily be viewed as all being the same. On the other hand, if your client can demonstrate that he's offering something more/better/different from the competition, that alone can be enough of an incentive for a prospect to jump ship to your guy. It also provides an opportunity to charge MORE money than the competition. | |
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| | #10 |
| Fingers of Fury War Room Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Miami, Florida, USA.
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| Getting Started Is Fast And Easy! Just call us toll-free at 1-800-CLEAN UP and put the hardest working cleaning crew in Augusta to work for you for 2 weeks – absolutely FREE. To continue receiving our outstanding service after your free 2 week trial, do nothing. Our team will continue to keep your office, building and commercial properties in tip-top shape and bill you monthly. Experience the fast and thorough job our stellar team of professionals delivers with every visit. Call 1-800-CLEAN UP now! |
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| | #11 | |
| Advanced Warrior War Room Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: London, United Kingdom
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told them your service/product will provide them with what they want? - if so, simply tell them what they need to do next. It doesn't have to be smart/clever/funny/sexy - if the visitor is reading your call to action then the heavy lifting should already have been done. "Your next step is simple - call us today on xxx-xxx-xxx and find out how Jasmine Janitors can serve you" Phil | |
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For my full online copywriting service visit writingbyphil.com | ||
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| | #12 |
| Affiliate SledgeHammer War Room Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: Mint Hill, NC, USA.
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One more thing you can do is read anything by Gary Halbert - a master at turing boring into sexy if anyone could. You can read his newsletters for free still at the archives: Halbert Newsletter Archives If that does not jog the creative juices, I don't know what will. David T. McKee |
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