I Want to Hire a Copy Writer to EDIT- ASAP

[greatbizideas]

Hi,

I am organizing a tele-seminar/ webinar event with 6 Top Internet Marketers. You can view the details about the event at http://www.InfoSeminarsClub.com

I already paid a nice amount for my copy on my main event page but not having good conversions.

1- I am looking for someone to Edit and give some very catchy headlines

2- I need some help with the Head lines that I can use for my WSO and also for classified ads and blog posts. I need options so that I can pick from them.

3- Can anyone recommend any good catchy headlines that I can use to promote my event?

4- I would also like to get help with nice subject lines for sending out emails... I am paying some hefty amount to promote the event. So I am looking for some really catchy email subject lines that will get good click through's and conversions

5- ALSO.. my OTO/ upsell offer page info is not so good for now. You can find it here.
Info Seminars Club

I want some short and precise text for my OTO/ upsell page

Please get back to me with Quotes and your previous work ASAP

Thanks
Reddy

[salamandar]

Originally Posted by Paul McQuillan

Step away for the highlighter

The copy is not very good. If you are
getting qualified traffic you will lose
a bunch with that.

At least re-do the top half so it's not so obnoxious

Paul,

I found the content more bland than obnoxious - despite that highlighter!

I kinda wonder how much the "nice amount" was.

Maurice

[Kevin-VirtualProfitCenter]

Originally Posted by Paul McQuillan

I found it visually obnoxious, not writing style.

People often find me visually obnoxious.

[David Raybould]

Edit?

It needs scrapping and starting over.

Sorry.

Greatbizideas -when you hire a writer,
make sure they've got some proven
winners in the niche you're aiming for.

If you do that, it's a lot less like playing
marketing roulette.

-David Raybould

[The Copy Nazi]

Apart from the tragic site, if these are truly

the Six Most Successful Internet Marketers Of Our Time

How come I've never heard of them? Do they fly under the radar or something? This claim definitely needs qualifying or addressing.

[Dean Dhuli]

I've heard of Reed Floren but I also don't know any of the other guys.


- Dean




[

[greatbizideas]

I will work on the changes you guys suggested.

Addressing the line "the six most successful internet marketers".... I should remove the word "most".. but other than that.. they are pretty successful ones... and I heard 4 of them speak before and they are pretty good.. with loads of info.

Keep the suggestions coming.....

Thanks
Reddy

[greatbizideas]

David,

The guy who wrote copy for me had some nice work history. He wrote copy for some big names.

May be I should re-invest in getting this written all over again.

Originally Posted by David Raybould

Edit?

It needs scrapping and starting over.

Sorry.

Greatbizideas -when you hire a writer,
make sure they've got some proven
winners in the niche you're aiming for.

If you do that, it's a lot less like playing
marketing roulette.

-David Raybould

[dtendrich]

Hey,

When you write enough copy you're bound to pop out some less-than-perfect stuff from time to time.

If he's a great writer - maybe this is just a fluke. I'd talk to him about it, tell him it's not converting, and ask him to re-visit it and get it selling.

David

[Paul Hooper-Kelly]

Hey Reddy,

If ...

The guy who wrote copy for me had some nice work history. He wrote copy for some big names.

... then surely, HE should be revising the letter until it works? You shouldn't need to spend your time looking for solutions.

Good luck,

Paul

[greatbizideas]

I'll try contacting him again to see if he going to change it to a better one. The problem is I dont have enough time as the event is scheduled to begin on the April 1st.


I will seriously do a total revamp of the whole thing for my next event.

Thanks for all your suggestions.... I love Warrior family..

[Dean Dhuli]

Just curious -- whose idea was it to use all that extra highlighting
and combinations of red, blue and highlighting in the same place?

I remember doing something similar BEFORE I wrote by first sales letter.
If this guy is an experienced copywriter like you say, I'd at least expect
him to know that he shouldn't be using all those funny color combinations.

Which means he may not be an experienced copywriter after all.

That's just my assumption though.


Take care,
Dean.


'

[edmltw]

"Pick The Brains..." Whhhhat?? Run that by me again..

Please. Change. The Headline.

Ed

[edmltw]

Start Earning Thousands of $$$ Online, Guided By Not One, But SIX MASTER Internet Marketers in a SIX Day Seminar - FREE

[greatbizideas]

The highlighting idea was not his though.... it was suggested by someone else... may be i over did it. I have many people say that is is bad... i'm gonna change it ASAP.

Originally Posted by Dean Dhuli

Just curious -- whose idea was it to use all that extra highlighting
and combinations of red, blue and highlighting in the same place?

I remember doing something similar BEFORE I wrote by first sales letter.
If this guy is an experienced copywriter like you say, I'd at least expect
him to know that he shouldn't be using all those funny color combinations.

Which means he may not be an experienced copywriter after all.

That's just my assumption though.


Take care,
Dean.


'

[Scott Murdaugh]

Not trying to rain on your parade...

But beyond a seminar full of guys I'd kill to talk to in person, you'd have to pay me (a lot) to sit through a 6-day seminar, even if it's only around an hour per day.

Surprised no one has mentioned this.

Also, if you need copy ASAP... You may want to post a budget. To get a decent copywriter to drop everything and knock this out, it's going to require some late nights, and it's going to cost a pretty penny.

You'll get replies. But the chances of you getting replies that are capable of what your asking for, without spending a small fortune, are slim at best.

Regardless, good luck with it.

-Scott

[Matt_L]

I'm not a pro like most of the folks responding here (although with a little effort and self education I could probably do as well as most of these hacks -- but, I'll tell you where I stopped reading.

(Keep in mind that I am a fan of tight writing and one of my favorite bathroom readers is Write Tight by William Brohaugh.)

The first set of bullets seem really wordy. They all begin with "Are you ready ...". While it's sort of rhythmic, it's too verbose. If I'm reading the copy to that point I think you may assume that yes, "I" am ready -- at least to some degree.

I would drop the "Are you ready ..." and just go with the shorter, easier to read and more powerful "FINALLY ..." :


- FINALLY honest answers about making a fortune online
- FINALLY the truth about dominating the competition and earning HUGE profits online
- FINALLY uncover the methods to make you a huge success

[Matt_L]

Yeah, so, I'm a nosy body and I took the day off. Here are more of my suggestions.

At the top of the page there are two phrases that start with "If you ..." Kind of pedantic and redundant to read and it looks a bit silly on the page.

I'd change this:

This Will Skyrocket Your Online Business And Give You A Razor-Sharp Edge Over ALL Of Your Competition!

to this:

Give Your Online Business A Razor Sharp Edge And Slice The Over-Sized Wart Laden Noses Off Of Your Competition

I wouldn't change it verbatim (unless you're a plastic surgeon who works on other plastic surgeons) but I'd follow through with the razor-slice word picture. I think you know what I mean.

This seems weak:

All you need to change your life and your finances forever is a little education and expert advice.

I'd favor something like this:

Change Your Life And your Finances Forever With A Little Expert Advice -- You Sorry Joe Bag Of Doughnuts!

Again, I wouldn't go verbatim, but I would move the active verbs closer to the beginning of my phrases.

And, I see how you're using the "Luck" theme throughout the page. If I were to do that I may try to keep luck in the same type, color and font.

If you'd like me to rewrite (make that edit) your page I'll do it for free as an exercise. PM me and let me know. I'd only want to do it if we could test mine against the other to see how I stack up.

[greatbizideas]

Scott and Matt...

thanks for your comments.. I am editing a lot of things on my page now...

i'll consider so many other aspects of the copy for my next event. I do not have a lot of time left for this event.

Scott.... you wrote some articles for me couple of years ago.. i remember you dude...i dont know if u remember me.. my name is reddy.

[Daniel Scott]

Originally Posted by greatbizideas

The highlighting idea was not his though.... it was suggested by someone else... may be i over did it. I have many people say that is is bad... i'm gonna change it ASAP.

This rings warning bells for me.

Have you changed anything else from the copy your copywriter gave you?

We've all had clients butcher our work and then complain it was our fault it didn't convert.

I'm not saying you did that... but if you did... I advise against it.

Having said that... the copy isn't good.

It's not horrible, but it's very, very bland.

My question to you is... what's a "nice amount"?

Because that doesn't look like a pro's work to me.

And it's not about who you've written for... it's about track record.

I know a lot of "big name" marketers who will pay 5 or 6 writers $200 for a sales letter each... and just cobble the best bits together (with heavy editing for flow, of course).

So just because you've written for a big name doesn't mean squat.

Ask them about what conversion rates they've achieved... how much money they've made their clients... etc.

That's what you need to know.

Good luck saving this... you've got your work cut out for you.

-Dan