almost UNBELIEVABLE but still possible headlines

Ross James · 01-24-2011, 08:50 PM

"Attract And Sleep With TWO Women By The End Of The Week!"

So I came across this headline, while I know it's not impossible, I'd really appreciate feedback from the more experienced copywriters on this BOLD as heck headline.

What are your thoughts about these almost unbelievable headlines? I'd really like to know because while it's still possible it's more than likely not going to happen.

-Ross

stealthpromo · 01-24-2011, 08:54 PM

Thats not a headline, thats how i finish a sentence.

Ross James · 01-24-2011, 08:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stealthpromo

Thats not a headline, thats how i finish a sentence.

talk is cheap

Bruce Wedding · 01-24-2011, 09:12 PM

It is a great headline but your subhead better qualify it or back it up or you'll lose them. I'm doing one similar right now.

stealthpromo · 01-24-2011, 09:14 PM

Haha Ross. (drags digitial camera out...calls out to russian models in background)

Ross James · 01-24-2011, 09:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stealthpromo

Haha Ross. (drags digitial camera out...calls out to russian models in background)

I still don't believe you.

You'll have to show me some proof.

-Ross

Ross James · 01-24-2011, 09:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bruce Wedding

It is a great headline but your subhead better qualify it or back it up or you'll lose them. I'm doing one similar right now.

Well the thing that really gets me is the product is over 200 pages. How the heck is someone supposed to read, reread, practice and get laid by two females by the end of the week. I'm just wondering what kind of buyers remorse this might trigger.

-Ross

ewenmack · 01-24-2011, 09:43 PM

What are your thoughts about these almost unbelievable headlines? I'd really like to know because while it's still possible it's more than likely not going to happen.

-Ross

Hey Ross,

It's perfectly possible, if you are dealing with 1 out of 10 quality women.

The headline doesn't mention this, so it's wide open to interpretation.

All the best,
Ewen

Ross James · 01-24-2011, 09:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ewenmack

What are your thoughts about these almost unbelievable headlines? I'd really like to know because while it's still possible it's more than likely not going to happen.

-Ross

Hey Ross,

It's perfectly possible, if you are dealing with 1 out of 10 quality women.

The headline doesn't mention this, so it's wide open to interpretation.

All the best,
Ewen

that's a good point, thanks ewen

briancassingena · 01-25-2011, 02:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bruce Wedding

It is a great headline but your subhead better qualify it or back it up or you'll lose them. I'm doing one similar right now.

Good point mate, it's like the silly "SEX - now that I have your attention..." headline

Ken_Caudill · 01-25-2011, 02:08 PM

The headline is a moron magnet. It should do well.

Alex Cohen · 01-25-2011, 03:10 PM

I think this headline would be much more believable ...

"Who Else Wants To Sleep With TWO Women
In The Next 72 Hours... Without Taking A Bath,
Combing Your Hair, Or Brushing Your Teeth?"

LOL

Alex

Ken_Caudill · 01-25-2011, 03:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ross James

Well the thing that really gets me is the product is over 200 pages. How the heck is someone supposed to read, reread, practice and get laid by two females by the end of the week. I'm just wondering what kind of buyers remorse this might trigger.

-Ross

Two hundred whole pages? That's a deal breaker, alright.

Ross James · 01-25-2011, 03:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ken_Caudill

Two hundred whole pages? That's a deal breaker, alright.

Yeah, right? I don't have time for reading anything If I have to get laid by two woman by the end of the week.

Ken_Caudill · 01-25-2011, 04:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ross James

Yeah, right? I don't have time for reading anything If I have to get laid by two woman by the end of the week.

It saddens me that this niche actually exists. The only way that headline will work is for it to include a flight to a brothel.

Daniel Scott · 01-25-2011, 05:11 PM

LOL, it doesn't say you can't pay for it.

Hookers are legal in this country... not sure about elsewhere.

Having said that... we all know jumping into bed with a girl you've just met is pretty easy...

...so long as you're willing to be flexible in your standards.

Three secrets:

1. Pick someone who is really drunk
2. Lie a lot
3. Compliment her a lot

You do this on someone who's needy and insecure you're bound to hit the jackpot.

So to me... hardly a bold promise.

Now if it's two women AT ONCE... that's a little more difficult.

@Ken: Agreed. It's sad people think this kind of shallow relationship is actually enjoyable... or maybe I'm just not as manly as I should be :P

-Daniel

Chris Worner · 01-25-2011, 05:34 PM

Ever heard the saying, "Man the harpoons!" ?

sethczerepak · 01-26-2011, 11:08 AM

Honestly, it's not all that ballsy really, considering the niche I mean. I wrote one just last week that's converting like nuts:

"I cracked the "female language code" for online dating. Now I'm getting laid and you're not."

A good smack in the ego is like Megan Fox dipped in fondue sauce when it comes to the men's dating/seduction niche. You almost can't overdo it.

tpw · 01-26-2011, 03:47 PM

If you are married and have a girlfriend on the side, it should not be a problem at all.

Grazina Ajana Szewczyk · 01-27-2011, 04:54 PM

Quote:

"Attract And Sleep With TWO Women By The End Of The Week!"

would that include a guy who went broke and has to share his bed with his wife AND a 73 year old, snoring like a jackhammer, mother-in-law?

Grazina Ajana Szewczyk · 01-27-2011, 05:02 PM

Quote:

"Who Else Wants To Sleep With TWO Women
In The Next 72 Hours... Without Taking A Bath,
Combing Your Hair, Or Brushing Your Teeth?"

Alex, I hope that I'm not breaking any copywriting laws here, but I confess I printed out your headline and put it on the board next to my computer. I'll make me laugh for the next three incarnations

01-24-2011, 08:50 PM	#1
Ross James Meta Warrior War Room Member Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Boston Suburbs, USA Posts: 487 Thanks: 96 Thanked 80 Times in 71 Posts Contact Info	almost UNBELIEVABLE but still possible headlines "Attract And Sleep With TWO Women By The End Of The Week!" So I came across this headline, while I know it's not impossible, I'd really appreciate feedback from the more experienced copywriters on this BOLD as heck headline. What are your thoughts about these almost unbelievable headlines? I'd really like to know because while it's still possible it's more than likely not going to happen. -Ross

01-24-2011, 08:54 PM	#2
stealthpromo WF #1 Graphic Designer War Room Member Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Chicago Posts: 115 Thanks: 0 Thanked 5 Times in 5 Posts Contact Info	Re: almost UNBELIEVABLE but still possible headlines Thats not a headline, thats how i finish a sentence.
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01-24-2011, 09:12 PM	#4
Bruce Wedding The Reality Check War Room Member Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Cancun, Quintana Roo, MX Posts: 3,621 Thanks: 320 Thanked 563 Times in 255 Posts Social Networking Contact Info	Re: almost UNBELIEVABLE but still possible headlines It is a great headline but your subhead better qualify it or back it up or you'll lose them. I'm doing one similar right now.
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01-24-2011, 09:14 PM	#5
stealthpromo WF #1 Graphic Designer War Room Member Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Chicago Posts: 115 Thanks: 0 Thanked 5 Times in 5 Posts Contact Info	Re: almost UNBELIEVABLE but still possible headlines Haha Ross. (drags digitial camera out...calls out to russian models in background)
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01-24-2011, 09:43 PM	#8
ewenmack Senior Warrior Member War Room Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Auckland, New Zealand Posts: 2,092 Thanks: 790 Thanked 1,027 Times in 558 Posts	Re: almost UNBELIEVABLE but still possible headlines What are your thoughts about these almost unbelievable headlines? I'd really like to know because while it's still possible it's more than likely not going to happen. -Ross Hey Ross, It's perfectly possible, if you are dealing with 1 out of 10 quality women. The headline doesn't mention this, so it's wide open to interpretation. All the best, Ewen

01-25-2011, 02:08 PM	#11
Ken_Caudill Here for the Beer War Room Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Chicago burbs Posts: 2,053 Blog Entries: 1 Thanks: 799 Thanked 1,280 Times in 795 Posts Social Networking Contact Info	Re: almost UNBELIEVABLE but still possible headlines The headline is a moron magnet. It should do well.
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01-25-2011, 03:10 PM	#12
Alex Cohen Copy Champion War Room Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Pennsylvania Posts: 1,001 Thanks: 45 Thanked 501 Times in 304 Posts Contact Info	Re: almost UNBELIEVABLE but still possible headlines I think this headline would be much more believable ... "Who Else Wants To Sleep With TWO Women In The Next 72 Hours... Without Taking A Bath, Combing Your Hair, Or Brushing Your Teeth?" LOL Alex

01-25-2011, 05:11 PM	#16
Daniel Scott The Cake Is A Lie War Room Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Mackay, QLD, Australia Posts: 2,199 Thanks: 298 Thanked 683 Times in 390 Posts Contact Info	Re: almost UNBELIEVABLE but still possible headlines LOL, it doesn't say you can't pay for it. Hookers are legal in this country... not sure about elsewhere. Having said that... we all know jumping into bed with a girl you've just met is pretty easy... ...so long as you're willing to be flexible in your standards. Three secrets: 1. Pick someone who is really drunk 2. Lie a lot 3. Compliment her a lot You do this on someone who's needy and insecure you're bound to hit the jackpot. So to me... hardly a bold promise. Now if it's two women AT ONCE... that's a little more difficult. @Ken: Agreed. It's sad people think this kind of shallow relationship is actually enjoyable... or maybe I'm just not as manly as I should be :P -Daniel
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01-25-2011, 05:34 PM	#17
Chris Worner Senior Warrior Member War Room Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Melbourne Posts: 1,337 Thanks: 1,925 Thanked 652 Times in 344 Posts Contact Info	Re: almost UNBELIEVABLE but still possible headlines Ever heard the saying, "Man the harpoons!" ?

01-26-2011, 11:08 AM	#18
sethczerepak Ninjapreneur War Room Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: The Beach Posts: 705 Thanks: 106 Thanked 192 Times in 130 Posts Social Networking	Re: almost UNBELIEVABLE but still possible headlines Honestly, it's not all that ballsy really, considering the niche I mean. I wrote one just last week that's converting like nuts: "I cracked the "female language code" for online dating. Now I'm getting laid and you're not." A good smack in the ego is like Megan Fox dipped in fondue sauce when it comes to the men's dating/seduction niche. You almost can't overdo it.
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01-26-2011, 03:47 PM	#19
tpw Bill Platt War Room Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Stillwater, Oklahoma, USA. Posts: 8,013 Blog Entries: 4 Thanks: 6,566 Thanked 6,086 Times in 2,739 Posts Social Networking Contact Info	Re: almost UNBELIEVABLE but still possible headlines If you are married and have a girlfriend on the side, it should not be a problem at all.
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