Please help me improve my sales page

[Henrik Poulsen]

Het guys

My new website (see signature) was lanched only a few weeks ago. since then I have been very busy getting the software registrered on a few hundred sharewaresites and already see some 50-10 downloads a day.

I do however keep having a feeling that my copy needs a lot of work.
Its only my second website and its my fist time writing copy for one.

On top of all this english isn't my first language at all (Im form Denmark)

Any critique or advise would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks in advance

[John_S]

First off, you have no reason for separating what little text there is into tabbeds section other than the layout demands it.

You are losing site visitors at every unnecessary click you force on them just to complete the scavenger hunt for information.

There should be a headline set in larger, bold font style. The headline should compel the reader. While "The Choice of Professionals" is not the worst headline, you never explain the reason why, so it's pointless hype.

The bullet points are generic and weak. "Built to be the most user friendly invoicing software there is" induces skepticism. You don't build user friendly software, you observe users interacting with the software and then eliminate problems. Knowing you didn't simply proclaim the software user friendly but employ sound interaction design principles (and give examples) would be credible.

There are no testimonials.

Don't think a screenshot is going to somehow inform users. Go through a scenario. Explain what your competitive advantages are as part of the runthrough. Use image callouts and highlight each point the viewer should pay attention to on the screenshot.

Did you know the layout of your invoicing software can influence receivable lag and provide a competitive advantage? I know of a couple of very savvy business techniques using invoices. Especially valuable during a deep, troubling recession.

There are a lot of invoices stacking up. What buyers want is something they can put on an invoice which insures the recipient picks their invoice out of the pile to pay first.

If you don't know things like this, then you haven't done the research to be able to make the claim "The Choice of Professionals." That's a pity, because the invoice holds a lot of hidden potential for business.

[Henrik Poulsen]

Wow John this is really great advice thank you

I went for the simplistic look for the website, but perhaps went a little overboard on that one. Perhaps I should look a little at the site and see if I can incorporate your points.

I did indeed think of putting testimonials on the site, but since the only ones we have are for the danish software i chose not to. Of course the software is in many parts an improvement to the danish version, so there should not be anything wrong with doing that.

I am going to concentrate a bit more on highlighting the advantages my prodct has over competition.

Again thanks a lot

Henrik Poulsen

[studygm]

I believe that you should include more screen shots that highlight the good design of the software, especially those critical pages in the sotware.
Moreover, you could try to put 3 or 4 pages together on the same page so that people can view all the information at once.

[Henrik Poulsen]

How about my colorchoice for the site.

I have a feeling that it is a bit to dark?

[John_S]

I don't think the color choice is bad. The body is light, and the eye moves from dark to light -- so you've got visual flow moving in the right direction.

[Henrik Poulsen]

Thanks john thats a great thing to remember.

That way Ill be able to reuse some of the site on the new one.
As i May have said before the site is just temporary, ment to be simple and easy to navigate.

On the next one though Ill probable use a more conventional layout without the horisontal scrolling effect. Theres just not enough room for copy.

By the way.
If anyone finds the software interesting I have made a special offer for you on warriorforum as a token of my appreciation.

20% off my invoicing software when ordering this month. Just type in this cupont code when ordering
45K2D45KX5

Regard

Henrik poulsen