Fierce B*tch or lame dog? Critque my site please

[creativeblogger]

My site (despite appearances due to imported content) is just a few weeks old.

www.creativeblogger.org

Please offer your critique on:

• appearance
• content
• clarity
• delivery

many thanks!

Fierce B*tch (hoping)

[tmursch]

The Youtube, Twitter, and Myspace icons underneath your picture are stretched (simple coding error forcing them to appear larger).

[vistad]

Originally Posted by creativeblogger

My site (despite appearances due to imported content) is just a few weeks old.

www.creativeblogger.org

Please offer your critique on:

• appearance
• content

Fierce B*tch (hoping)

The top menu tool appearance is not attractive enough. Further do something about 'The Sexes' hanging in the second line. Maybe you could do something as unconventional as placing the 'About Me' somewhere else.

The testimonial on display says that you Leah, are a good writer. However the other one by Bruce Horst (?) starts by saying that you will pull in traffic. Bruce's first para goes better with the heading to the left.

Otherwise I liked the site.

Sorry I could only spare a little time. so I have not been able to go through it thoroughly, specially the sales P*tch.

[Daniel Scott]

I'm not a designer, but as a visitor, your page is cluttered and confusing. On first glance I don't really know what to look at, and even if I did, nothing is particularly attractive.

You wanted the buttons to be seen but now they're just a blurry mess. If you want bigger buttons, find some bigger buttons, don't just try and use small ones.

As far as the content goes, I think it seriously lacks punch. From a writer's perspective, there are a lot of issues with punctuation and typos. Normally, that's not a big deal, but you ARE selling writing services here.

Copywriting wise, I think you need more "oomph" and focus more on the benefits. I don't really care about what you're gonna do - what I care about is how it will help me. Try and show why what you're doing is so important.

-Dan

[MichelleB]

Overall it's good, but I think you really need to crank it up a few notches to make it more compelling. Because if you aren't compelling me to buy your services as a copywriter, why should I think you'd be able to compel anyone to buy my product? For one thing, I wouldn't say, "I can write website copy that will help sell your product..." I'd say, "I will write website copy guaranteed to sell your product." (the guarantee is that if it doesn't sell you'll rewrite it twice). Or something like that! I feel like you have too many modifiers that weaken your sales points. I understand you don't want to sound like you're all hype or spammy, but I think you need to at least strengthen up the hype in your intro, and then you can expand on your points to paint a complete picture later on, as you've done.

Also you should have someone proofread it for you because there are basic punctuation mistakes etc as others have said, such as "fee's" when it should be "fees".

And I agree with others, the twitter icons look like they are malfunctioning. You need to find bigger graphics, they look degraded and buggy.

[creativeblogger]

Hi all, thanks for the advice, twitter etc icons restored to normal size.

[Johnny12345]

I find it extremely odd that you're mixing the topics of sex and copywriting on a single blog. The topics are unrelated. It would be better to split your content into separate sites.

Johnny

[AnneE]

I started browsing around and thought "oh, a site for writers. something I might like." I was merrily scrolling around.... and then "what the heck.... a link for penis enlargement?" really.

I don't think I'm a prude, but to me, I immediately dismissed the site as not being by a real writer who is serious about the craft and profession of writing. So I totally agree with Johnny12345.

[creativeblogger]

Originally Posted by AnneE

I started browsing around and thought "oh, a site for writers. something I might like." I was merrily scrolling around.... and then "what the heck.... a link for penis enlargement?" really.

I don't think I'm a prude, but to me, I immediately dismissed the site as not being by a real writer who is serious about the craft and profession of writing. So I totally agree with Johnny12345.

I get offers to do copy that relates to women related products and dating and so on, so it relates.

I don't want to sell fridge freezers!

My biggest client contacted me after reading a post about large penises, which surprised me too, but we now have an ongoing writing and marketing relationship and it relates to food not sex.

I guess business people aren't as stuffy as you imagine them to be.

I market towards people I want to work with and stuffed shirts aren't in that group.

I pick and choose the work I do rather than randomly applying for or accepting anything.

[creativeblogger]

Originally Posted by Johnny12345

I find it extremely odd that you're mixing the topics of sex and copywriting on a single blog. The topics are unrelated. It would be better to split your content into separate sites.

Johnny

I agree and don't agree, I've toyed with this many times.

The sexy articles are funny rather than pornographic and as humor and good story telling is hard to find with a writer it does set me apart.

[Johnny12345]

Originally Posted by creativeblogger

I agree and don't agree, I've toyed with this many times.

The sexy articles are funny rather than pornographic and as humor and good story telling is hard to find with a writer it does set me apart.

You said, in your first post, that the site is only a few weeks old. So how much testing have you actually done to reach the conclusion that mixing sex and copywriting is working out well for you?

Johnny

[Daniel Scott]

From reading posts on your blog it's pretty obvious you're not a copywriter.

You talk about "being different" and "standing out" and diss standard copywriting conventions.

Guess what, the big red headlines, yellow highlighting, bold, starting a letter with the benefits to the CUSTOMER - all that stuff WORKS. THAT is why it's even every sales letter ever written.

Greater writers than you or I will ever be use these tactics every day without apology. I think there's a lesson in that.

You're trying your best to come across like you know what you're doing, and there's nothing wrong with that, but you're not doing a very good job.

That's not to say you won't get work - a lot of business owners will happily pay you to write copy for them that simply won't convert. And they won't know any better, because they don't track.

Clearly you're a great writer. However, you're putting down basic copywriting conventions that the top copywriters use regularly. "Standing out" is done by your positioning, your USP, and stuff like that - not by writing a sales letter that doesn't convert.

-Dan

[creativeblogger]

Originally Posted by Johnny12345

You said, in your first post, that the site is only a few weeks old. So how much testing have you actually done to reach the conclusion that mixing sex and copywriting is working out well for you?

Johnny

This is a new site but I have many sites.

I've been getting work offers weekly for the last two years.

(When I was posting regularly on the cw that is, as I did take a break)

I still am.

Though my largest client came from a business card referral but the penis post was the first thing he saw when he checked out my site.

[creativeblogger]

Originally Posted by Daniel Scott

From reading posts on your blog it's pretty obvious you're not a copywriter.

You talk about "being different" and "standing out" and diss standard copywriting conventions.

Guess what, the big red headlines, yellow highlighting, bold, starting a letter with the benefits to the CUSTOMER - all that stuff WORKS. THAT is why it's even every sales letter ever written.

Greater writers than you or I will ever be use these tactics every day without apology. I think there's a lesson in that.

You're trying your best to come across like you know what you're doing, and there's nothing wrong with that, but you're not doing a very good job.

That's not to say you won't get work - a lot of business owners will happily pay you to write copy for them that simply won't convert. And they won't know any better, because they don't track.

Clearly you're a great writer. However, you're putting down basic copywriting conventions that the top copywriters use regularly. "Standing out" is done by your positioning, your USP, and stuff like that - not by writing a sales letter that doesn't convert.

-Dan

I checked out your ad, you are selling a low priced product.

Try selling something that costs £15,000 and see how far your copy style gets you.

Do you see any high value item advertised this way?

Not in the UK that's for sure.

That style only works for certain products which is why you only see them promoting certain products and I'm not knocking it. I'm not an eBook seller.


Re your own product

I wrote one post that took me under 10mins on 'how to tell if a girl likes you' and it is on the front page of Google for that key phrase and was read nearly 20,000 times in a few short months. The comments from information hungry teens were a plenty. If I was selling a product like yours it would've sold easily.

http://www.problogs.com/Post3623.htm
http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en...w+to+tell+if+a

This site was since sold off and is now dormant but those figures were that high within 6 months.

I'm also number 3 in Google for search term 'how to get girls to like you'

http://www.google.com/search?ie=UTF-...ls+to+like+you

You'd be lucky to have me promote your product.

I have a dating eBook that is VERY well rec'd as it's funny.
http://www.1soulmate4u.talktalk.net/...t_1%5B1%5D.pdf

You'd convert your customer better if your ad had some funny little stories in it about guys who were asked

'is it in yet?'

in fact

you could use that as your opening line. It's a phrase all guys dread!

Or

" Are you done yet?"

even worse.


Your ad may sell well, but it could sell better.

[Daniel Scott]

Let's get something straight right off the bat. You have no idea what my product is like. You are welcome to your opinions about the copy; that's fine, but in the interests of fairness I don't think it's cool for you to have a go at a product you have absolutely, 100% zero ideas about. I've gotten a lot of great emails regarding that product and how it has helped people improve their sex lives in a couple of cases even save their marriages.

Now, do I see high-value items advertised this way? I suppose that depends on where exactly you draw the line at "high value". There are products in the thousands that use that format sales letter (though obviously the focus would be on different points, that's a given). Traffic secrets and Butterfly Marketing (etc) still had the same "basic sales letter" format that you're having a go at and TS did over a million in 24 hours.

I'd say that's pretty damn good. Obviously there were videos etc etc but the copy was ultra-hyped up, with a red headline and craploads of highlighting - but guess what, it WORKED.

I'm not sure how much fifteen thousand pounds is in US dollars, I think about $30 000? Personally I can't think of any item that would sell with just a sales letter in that price range; usually, for that kind of money, there has to be some serious face-to-face meeting. Of course, it depends on what you're selling, but generally no one makes that kind of investment without some kind of physical contact with the product.

If your point was that copy styles should differ between different products, I'd say that is pretty obvious.

Regarding the fact that I'd be "lucky" to have you promoting my product, I can't deny that your articles get a fair bit of traffic. Kudos, but that amount of views, while good, isn't unprecedented for a few months. It also doesn't say anything about click rates or conversion rates on said clicks. Teenagers are NOT my target market, so I expect the conversions from them would be pretty low.

I honestly don't know why you're getting so snarky. People have offered you advice in this thread which you have (mostly) ignored. That is, of course, your prerogative, but IMHO kind of defeats the purpose in asking for a critique in a public forum.

And as an aside, with regards to my sales page being very, very similar to others in the niche - I totally agree I need to craft a USP and get some kind of individualization in there. However, despite that, the page is doing okay. Not great, but okay (1.25% CR - thanks to the critique I got in this forum that helped me pinpoint a few issues). Obviously there are still a lot of kinks to iron out, but the page is doing reasonably well. Most products aren't that fortunate.

The simple fact of the matter is that copy is about pushing a reader's emotional hot buttons and getting them to take an action, despite resistance. All products in the same niche will pretty much target the same kinds of motivation factors - jealousy, fear of loss, the need for security, luxury, to be well-liked, a legacy, etc etc. When you break it down people are pretty basic, really.

Several people have mentioned issues with your site - one that was backed up by a man who is probably a better copywriter than any of us could ever aspire to be.

You can either take the advice on the chin, like an adult, and at least consider it before dismissing it, or continue to ignore it all (in which case I'm not sure why you even asked for a critique).

-Dan

Originally Posted by creativeblogger

I checked out your ad, you are selling a cheap crappy product to people who want cheap crappy products.

Try selling something that costs £15,000 and see how far your copy style gets you.

Do you see any high value item advertised this way?

Not in the UK that's for sure.

That style only works for certain products which is why you only see them promoting certain products and I'm not knocking it. I'm not an eBook seller.

Your ad is a dime a dozen.

It's pretty much identical to every other 'give your gal an orgasm' sales page. I know as I looked at those products to see if they were worth placing on my Xposed Secrets of the Sexes Blog.

I wrote one post that took me under 10mins on 'how to get girls to like you' and it was read over 20,000 times in a few short months. The comments from information hungry teens were a plenty. If I was selling a product like yours it would've sold easily.

I'm number 3 in Google for that search term with a totally different article on the same theme.

how to get girls to like you - Google Search

You'd be lucky to have me promote your product.

[creativeblogger]

I don't consider 1.5% a great conversion rate. I wrote a sales letter to promote a brick and mortar business of my own and it converted 25%.

I have another business (offline) that I only promote via free means online which converts 1 in 30 targeted visitors and that's not surprising given my fee is twice what others are charging. Else it'd be a much higher conversion. My free ad dominates Google's front page for the leading keywords in that business.

Our markets are different.

But when I set my mind to something being a success, it is.

I'm bored with hearing cw's tell me my copy is bad.

RE high price items that can't sell in print, what are you on about??

I have a pal who sells a product that costs £150,000+, you can't SEE it until it's been installed and is up and running.

The selling is done initially via printed means, as is the case for anyone selling this product and promoting it online.

When he gets an inquiry he has to write a proposal and guess who got him his first £150,000 client with a proposal letter? YES, me!

I'm bored with hearing my copy is bad from people who sell eBooks.

I once needed to raise £40,000 for a charity for 3 years running and I raised the funds with just 5 letters sent to just five people.

Don't tell me my words can't sell.

[Daniel Scott]

As I said in my previous post, I don't think 1.5 (actually my site is 1.25%) CR great either. But the "leading" website in my niche is doing about 3%, so I don't think I'm doing too badly.

My point wasn't to "brag" about my admittedly "okay, but not great" CR, but rather to point out that your general attitude on your website about copywriters is not accurate.

I'm the first to admit I'm not a genius. I just try and take what people have already gotten to work, adapt it for my own use and re-use it. But I think it's irresponsible to say that marketing techniques that have worked for YEARS and YEARS are not any good.

-Dan

[creativeblogger]

Originally Posted by Daniel Scott

. I think it's irresponsible to say that marketing techniques that have worked for YEARS and YEARS are not any good.

-Dan

I never said that did I? Where did I say that?

Listen

People check ad against ad these days, they hit 'buy' on the first ad they read, some may but many are savvier than that. They make comparisons. So if you want to stand apart from the other bazillion ads your ad has to stand out. That's what I said, and that's old news not new news!

Crikey this is the first rule of selling anything and it starts with selling yourself when you apply for a job.

Your cv has to 'stand out'

It needs something different.

Here's a mad story but it's true.

When I was hired to manage one of the Uk's largest Health Centers ( a beacon centre) one of my 'features' that swayed them were my boots.

yes, you read right 'my boots'

Doctors aren't all the full shilling clearly but they took my odd looking snake skin cowboy boots as a sign of individuality as they wanted someone a 'bit different'. They got that alright.

[Sunny Outside]

The green font is a little on the too light side, I think.

[creativeblogger]

I’ve listened almost patiently while some say that my sales copy is bad. Funny given they’ve never seen any of my direct response sales copy which I labour over until it’s guaranteed to be a success.

I can’t show you any of it either.


This copy was written for brick and mortar businesses and they have the copy.


But I can tell you the results.

I wrote a business plan (I probably do have a copy of this actually, I’ll dig it out) that was hailed by the loan manager at the bank as the best he’d ever seen. He granted me £40,000 unsecured loan (unsecured - unheard of!) and two weeks later quit his job and stole the idea. He actually took the franchise area detailed in my plan. Imagine how that felt at the time. I wasn’t pleased with my ‘great business plan’ I was seething with rage.


Why was it the best business plan he’d ever seen?

Because I covered all my bases. Selling an idea is no different to selling a product or service. You need to know everything about the idea.
I did my SWOT analysis, researched my competitors, studied my market and market trends. I read the 70 page franchise document frontwards, backwards, sidewards!
I anticipated every question the loan manager would ask and had an answer in that plan for all of them.


Selling is like playing a game chess. To succeed you have to anticipate the opponents moves and that’s what I do best!

I am very good at chess too by the way, for this same reason. I think ahead to the future. I imagine every possible move and how I will counter it. I have every possible move the player can make mapped in my head and my counter moves before I make my move ahead of his!


It sounds time consuming, but I anticipate all things rapidly.


This is another thing that makes me different, my rapid problem solving and forcasting ability.

If you want to sell anything you have to anticipate every question they’ll ask you. Questions won’t just cover you, they’ll compare you to the competitor so you need to know their every move as well as your own. I’m not reinventing the wheel here, this is OLD news.


I started reading about ‘how to sell’ when I was eight.

My mum took me to work with her during the school holidays and all I had to read was her bosses books on ’selling’. I must have read 20 of the darn things!


All that great information sunk in deep and that’s why when it comes to selling, I do know what I’m about.


Another time I needed to raise £40,000 for the continuation of a charitable trust for each year, three years running. £120,000 in total.


I sent out 5 proposal letters and got 5 sponsors. 100% result!

My letters were successful as I researched the target market and sent them to people who I identified as being the most likely to sponsor us.
With thousands of sponsors to choose from this wasn’t easy and took weeks!
When I found my targets. I read in detail every word of their lengthy terms and conditions and tailored every single letter to meet them all, telling them WHY they should give us so much money.


This wasn’t easy, we were a NHS organisation asking for charity. I had to set up a charitable trust to separate the two, re-write the legal contract (as the solicitor couldn’t hack it) and only then could we proceed legally and to the sponsors satisfaction.


That’s what makes me unique, this is why the people I work for succeed.


I go that extra mile.


I’m not selling eBooks,

When you have a business plan you get one shot at your bank manager.


One shot!


Conversion needs to be 100% not o.o2%
I’ve asked for hundreds of thousands of £’s in loans and charitable donations and got it on the strength of one piece of copy!

Don’t tell me I can’t bloody sell!

[Daniel Scott]

No one is saying you can't sell. We're simply saying that the sales copy you showed us was poor.

If you want to ignore that advice, that's your prerogative.

No one's having a go at your abilities - just this one site. Mmkay?

-Dan

[creativeblogger]

Originally Posted by Daniel Scott

No one is saying you can't sell. We're simply saying that the sales copy you showed us was poor.

If you want to ignore that advice, that's your prerogative.

No one's having a go at your abilities - just this one site. Mmkay?

-Dan

You are correct.

My site doesn't reflect my higher end market type of copy.

It does reflect intelligence though, which these identikit ads totally lack.

[Daniel Scott]

Then why on earth did you ask for advice if you were predisposed to ignore it anyway?

You're not making a lot of sense here.

-Dan

[creativeblogger]

Originally Posted by Daniel Scott

Then why on earth did you ask for advice if you were predisposed to ignore it anyway?

You're not making a lot of sense here.

-Dan

I haven't ignored it. I didn't ask for advice from an identikit ad author. It was a general question.

My self promo ads have altered radically, not based on advice on this thread but on advice from another.

You lot mainly just mentioned layout, which I can't do too much about as it's a wordpress blog etc.

Some mentioned the 'sex' bit too, but I'm keeping it for now as it's 'me' in those posts.

[Metronicity]

Fierce Bitch or Lame Dog?

I can't help myself. I have to join in. CreativeBlogger you start off by asking for people's opinions on your site and then you get the ****s and all defensive about your site design and your precious writing? What did you expect? You want everyone to tell you what a genius you are? Aint gonna happen.

Anyway...here's my two bob's worth on your site. For someone who wants to stand out from the crowd your layout is rather banal. And the copy is nothing out of the box either. "She who dares wins" sucks dogballs IMO. Cheesy as. The links to the "penis" stuff is a DEFINITE turnoff. You're putting yourself in the same basket as all the shonks out there. You may as well have "acai" links while you're at it.

You desparage the use of Red Heads and yellow Highlighting and the rest of it - but as someone pointed out, they work. They work a treat. People scan copy. They don't read our stuff word for word. They're not there going "boy this babe can write!" They could care less. They're just trying to get to the good stuff straight away. That's why Red Heads, Highlights and bullet points work - they make life easier for the reader.

For the life of me I don't know why you're going to the commenters sites and then ripping in to them. That's just plain bad net etiquette. It's not their sites being critiqued - it's yours. You don't like their opinions. Cool. Don't take any notice. Why the vitriol? That just makes you look like a nasty piece of work and turns people off doing business with you. Lighten up. It's only the internet.

Fierce Bitch? Nuh. It's a Three-Legged Dog.

[Kay King]

For the life of me I don't know why you're going to the commenters sites and then ripping in to them. That's just plain bad net etiquette. It's not their sites being critiqued - it's yours. You don't like their opinions. Cool. Don't take any notice. Why the vitriol? That just makes you look like a nasty piece of work and turns people off doing business with you. Lighten up. It's only the internet.

I agree - when you ask for opinions, no guarantee they will all tell you the copy is as good as you say it is. As others didn't ask for opinions on their copy, no point in your overly critical and angry remarks.

I also questioned mixing sex in with copywriting but if you find it works for you, do it. I find your later posts in this thread similar to the impression I got from the copy on the blog.....I,I,I,me,me. The copy struck me as overly aggressive but that may be due to my preference in copywriting style.

Again, if it works for you - that's all you need to know. If you don't care what others think about your layout and copy, etc., don't ask.

kay

[OnlineMasterMind]

This isn't about you looking for advice.

It's about you looking for APPROVAL.

You're obviously very insecure. Why else would you try to ARGUE and DEFEND everything on your site when people are genuinely trying to offer their help.

HERE'S THE DEAL:

What is the GOAL of your site?

Good websites have an OBJECTIVE - something that is MEASURABLE. (i.e to capture a lead, to make a sale...etc)

What is your website currently CONVERTING at? That is how many people take action divided by the total number of visitors.

Make sense?

These numbers aren't a matter of opinion - like you seem to be so concerned with.

They are objective and factual.

And until you know them, you're just playing around.

[Bigsofty]

I suspect Leah is still smarting from the same roasting on a different forum

You know girl, when I first saw your pic a few weeks back, I did a double take. Your hair is longer (and probably in better condition snark) and a different tone but asides from that you're identical to my ex. She's from the UK too.

And she has/had exactly the same attitude.

That, and the fact she turned physically violent, is why she's my ex.

I'd 2nd the insecurity thing, big time.

You are simply not a good writer, not when purely exposed via text. In text you're naked. You can't bring your pretty face, sexual hints or that you were in charge of an opticians at a young age, into your client's copy. None of it is relevant.

There's a saying in sales - you're only as good as your last pitch. Not your last sale, not the eager buyer who just wanted someone to take the order, your last pitch.

You're confusing the concept of putting yourself into the prospects shoes by actually putting on YOUR shoes and asking "What do I want?" (from the sales copy).

Instead you study the prospect, in depth, in order to kick the crap out of them for your client. Geddit?

Sure, you don't like red headlines. Nor do most people - but they READ them.

You don't like yellow highlighter - but you can't help noticing the words highlighted.

You can sell, super successful, all that? OK, so raising the cash is no problem; get yourself a decent mentorship. Leave your attitude at the door and go learn copywriting.

Know why I'm telling you? Because you DO have brass balls and could be an AWESOME copywriter, if only you knew what the hell you were doing and would take some friggin' advice along with your constant pasting of self-promotional adverts "for critique".

Yeah I'm calling you on it, you're spamming. On a certain other forum there must be about 4 or 5 threads of you posting adverts for yourself, for critique of course. Wink. Except how can it be for critique, when you won't really accept any?

I've been copywriting for a couple or three years now, only just recently went completely freelance. I know, marketing yourself is tough. Even more so because you're insecure, because you know deep down you're not a copywriter.

You need to fix that. Or do something else.

I'd say fix it, as you have the potential. First learn grammar, heck, learn grammar at the same time but learn how to write copy.

In your everyday life some people hate you, some people love you, right? You're that kind of person. That, channelled properly, is great for copy. Right now you're spraying it everywhere and demanding we know (and take note) that some peeps love ya.

Noted. Now go learn copywriting. The world will wait, cos you CAN be a big hitter.

Right now you're hurting yourself.



B.
(Alan Carr copywriter-ac.com)

[AnneE]

My point about the link to penis enlargement is that when I saw it, I just saw it in the right-hand column and figured it was a link for anyone interested in penis enlargement.... if it was meant to be a sample of your copywriting ability, then I would have it on a portfolio page or work samples or whatever you want to call it. But some place where I would know that you weren't another idiot bombarding me with suggestions for enlarging a body part that I don't have (and no my frustration is not penis-envy.... it's people trying to sell to the wrong market -- you know like you don't offer the 100% bald guy a coupon to the hair salon).

I guess that's maybe a basic question, what is your website target... other writers? potential customers looking for your copywriting skills? If both, perhaps have your information separated into those categories "Writing Tips" or "Copywriting Tips" versus "Interested in My Copywriting Services". If I'm on your website to learn about writing, then the minute I see penis enlargement, I head for the big X in the upper-right corner of my web browser and I bet I'm not alone.

[creativeblogger]

Originally Posted by AnneE

My point about the link to penis enlargement is that when I saw it, I just saw it in the right-hand column and figured it was a link for anyone interested in penis enlargement.... if it was meant to be a sample of your copywriting ability, then I would have it on a portfolio page or work samples or whatever you want to call it. But some place where I would know that you weren't another idiot bombarding me with suggestions for enlarging a body part that I don't have (and no my frustration is not penis-envy.... it's people trying to sell to the wrong market -- you know like you don't offer the 100% bald guy a coupon to the hair salon).

I guess that's maybe a basic question, what is your website target... other writers? potential customers looking for your copywriting skills? If both, perhaps have your information separated into those categories "Writing Tips" or "Copywriting Tips" versus "Interested in My Copywriting Services". If I'm on your website to learn about writing, then the minute I see penis enlargement, I head for the big X in the upper-right corner of my web browser and I bet I'm not alone.

I agree, it's confusing.

I'll work on it some more

Meanwhile a recent sample of copy for an eBook can be seen here
X-Posed - Secrets of The Sexes!: How to be so great in bed she's the one falling asleep afterwards.

It was written in mins though not weeks, and this won't go on my creativeblogger.org blog, but I may use it as a demo of fast copy that hits the spot.

Copy with a longer deadline would of course be greatly improved.

No yellow highlighter but lots of lovely red font. That should keep the regulars happy

[creativeblogger]

hi Anne E

on your advice I've removed the category section and cloud so you can't see any of those sexy topics or find them unless you 'search' the blog or land on the article via a Google referral.

You can visit them via the 'blog' tab, but I think that's explained now re the first post so can remain.

I have also clarified the two different services on offer on my front page.

I hope this makes it clearer!

Thanks

[Mynt]

Very first impression for me:
"Wow very wide, somewhat cluttered--looks like there's a lot to read" Which discouraged me from reading on. Perhaps a cleaner, simpler home page with something catchy might help? Of course, the design depends more on what you want to accomplish as mentioned.

Something else, have you considered a professional photograph of yourself. As a professional photographer--at least--that would scream out "professionalism" and "quality" which translates to a more inspired, motivated, and serious attitude towards exploring your site beyond its home page.

[creativeblogger]

I have another site that's less busy on another platform

X-Posed - Secrets of Great Sex

Is this less a better layout?

[Chad Kettner]

Why are you hosting your sales letters on blogspot?

[creativeblogger]

Originally Posted by Chad Kettner

Why are you hosting your sales letters on blogspot?

This isn't my main business, I'm just dabbling.

I like to write on this topic and it doesn't make sense not to make a few quid in the process.

The first ad I wrote never included a product, but when the traffic started arriving, I thought..why not, so I found this one by M Webb and it seems like a better product than most of this kind.

I'll see how it does.

I never pay for advertising, have never needed to so far.

If I decide to take this seriously though I might do a PPC campaign, I think a nice friendly little blog with lots of free advice might capture more interest than a brazen ad.

I might try it for a short period just to see.

The other affiliate products I sold came right out the blue as the result of a single blog post and very little traffic. So I know you can sell via blogs.

My stats show people go a on an affiliate ad click fest when they stop by so all I need is a boost in the right kind of traffic.

Presently I am number 1 on google for 'pretty vagina' all I need now is a related product

We'll see how it goes.

I'm driving traffic to the blog presently.

[creativeblogger]

I finally got around to changing my site (after advice here) so now it's only two columns instead of three and far less cluttered.

I think it's looks far better.

http://www.creativeblogger.org

Thanks all