NON-NATIVE SPEAKER: Please critique my "Warriors For Hire" offer

Valentine · 05-11-2009, 08:46 AM

Hello Copywarriors!

I'm about to launch my first WF offer, but I have a bit of a problem: I'm not a native speaker and my copy might have some grammatical mistakes and be a bit clumsy to read.

I offer minisite design, so I don't really have much to say, instead I let my work samples speak for themselves, so there's almost no text. This is really going to be quick.

So here's my offer:

Hello, I suppose you are an experienced Internet Marketer, and want to ask you 3 simple questions:
Are you tired of ugly websites and landing pages that infest internet?

Do you want to stand out from the heap of those "monsters"?

Do you want to have high credibility, so your customers will trust you more?

If you've answered YES to any of those questions, then you've probably been thinking about getting a custom designed website which fully corresponds your needs and needs of your customers.
If so, then I'm very happy to be at your service.

My name is Valentin Spitsyn and I'm an experienced web-designer. I'm not going to waste any time and qualify myself in this thread and let my work samples speak for themselves:

You can also customize these packages with additional graphics on your choice:
Video Player Box

Text Formatting

Flash Animation (animated headers, ecovers, etc)

Other Custom "Call To Action" Graphics

Please ask your questions and place your orders in this thread, I will answer them shortly.

Regards,
Valentin Spitsyn

travlinguy · 05-11-2009, 09:02 AM

A couple of things: It's clear that English isn't the first language of the writer of this copy. But that's easily fixed. For very small money you can get any number of Warriors to get this offer in nice shape.

The second item is that your prices are pretty high compared to what other Warriors are offering in the way of Web design. You might want to look at the WSOs and other site design deals floating around this forum and maybe adjust your prices to be more competitive. Good luck!

Magic Johnson · 05-11-2009, 12:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by travlinguy

your prices are pretty high compared to what other Warriors are offering in the way of Web design. You might want to look at the WSOs and other site design deals floating around this forum and maybe adjust your prices to be more competitive. Good luck!

189-396$ are these high priced? This designs are great looking and could be worth more than this sums if you ask me. Serious were do you get your numbers from??

gl on the WSO

lenlatimer · 05-11-2009, 02:28 PM

I agree, I would suggest you hire one of the Warriors - let them interview you and write your copy. Nothing wrong with having visual talents, and you do.

For a WSO you should probably offer 50% off or there abouts. It is a little high for the beginners but not unreasonable. Good luck.

Valentine · 05-11-2009, 02:36 PM

Thank you warriors!

Is there anyone who is interested in helping me writing a nice copy, and what would be your price?

BTW, this is not a WSO, but a normal offer. But I was planning to run a WSO with a 30-40% discount, I'm not sure if I'm ready yet, but I might take 5 customers, so keep an eye on the WSO section.

Cherilyn Woodhouse · 05-11-2009, 04:31 PM

Wow, you're a kick-ass graphic designer that is for sure. Perhaps one of the copywriters in here (*cough* maybe me *cough*) would be willing to give it a quick run-over for persuasion, spelling, and grammar in exchange for some design work???

Dmitry · 05-12-2009, 03:45 AM

I think your art skills are pretty darn fine man!

I have an idea about your copy... why don't you remove it?

People are already searching for this, it's not like you have to push and sell them anything... just make the prices real cheap for the first 5 - a WSO.

Get testimonials.

Then increase the price a bit for the next 5.

Get testimonials.

And so on.

Make your initial prices maybe 75% - 90% off. Yes, you must give first to receive. But this will build a strong portfolio for you here. People will love you. Then they'll be comfortable spending more with you.

Make an offer too good to refuse and you don't need any sales copy.

Didier Faucher · 05-12-2009, 10:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by travlinguy

your prices are pretty high compared to what other Warriors are offering in the way of Web design.

Maybe these Warriors price their services too low?

Didier

Valentine · 05-12-2009, 10:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Didier Faucher

Maybe these Warriors price their services too low?

Didier

In my opinion their prices are quite reasonable, comparing to what they have to offer.

Valentine · 05-12-2009, 10:28 AM

By the way guys, I've launched my offer in the "Warrior For Hire" section. Good news is that I've lowered my price to a bare minimum but for the first 5 lucky warriors only.

http://www.warriorforum.com/warriors...er-inside.html

- Valentine

Didier Faucher · 05-13-2009, 01:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Valentine

In my opinion their prices are quite reasonable, comparing to what they have to offer.

Ouch!!!

Magic Johnson · 05-14-2009, 07:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Didier Faucher

Ouch!!!

That's the kind of attitude I like from a designer/copywriter/writer/IM --- just prove that someone cares enough and willingness to improve in their profession.

I never fear competitive personalities.

Sometimes it's an must have if you want to work in certain fields and make enough money
to get by month after month, and have food on your table.

05-11-2009, 08:46 AM	#1
Valentine Active Warrior War Room Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Helsinki/Finland Posts: 79 Thanks: 20 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Contact Info	NON-NATIVE SPEAKER: Please critique my "Warriors For Hire" offer Hello Copywarriors! I'm about to launch my first WF offer, but I have a bit of a problem: I'm not a native speaker and my copy might have some grammatical mistakes and be a bit clumsy to read. I offer minisite design, so I don't really have much to say, instead I let my work samples speak for themselves, so there's almost no text. This is really going to be quick. So here's my offer: Hello, I suppose you are an experienced Internet Marketer, and want to ask you 3 simple questions: Are you tired of ugly websites and landing pages that infest internet? Do you want to stand out from the heap of those "monsters"? Do you want to have high credibility, so your customers will trust you more? If you've answered YES to any of those questions, then you've probably been thinking about getting a custom designed website which fully corresponds your needs and needs of your customers. If so, then I'm very happy to be at your service. My name is Valentin Spitsyn and I'm an experienced web-designer. I'm not going to waste any time and qualify myself in this thread and let my work samples speak for themselves: You can also customize these packages with additional graphics on your choice: Video Player Box Text Formatting Flash Animation (animated headers, ecovers, etc) Other Custom "Call To Action" Graphics Please ask your questions and place your orders in this thread, I will answer them shortly. Regards, Valentin Spitsyn
	"Another one of those things that keep people from taking action on anything is because every time you look into something, its already been done!" (c) shanerbock (War Room Forum)

05-11-2009, 09:02 AM	#2
travlinguy Senior Warrior Member War Room Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Northern Hemisphere, for now. Posts: 2,938 Thanks: 1,316 Thanked 1,635 Times in 956 Posts Contact Info	Re: NON-NATIVE SPEAKER: Please critique my "Warriors For Hire" offer A couple of things: It's clear that English isn't the first language of the writer of this copy. But that's easily fixed. For very small money you can get any number of Warriors to get this offer in nice shape. The second item is that your prices are pretty high compared to what other Warriors are offering in the way of Web design. You might want to look at the WSOs and other site design deals floating around this forum and maybe adjust your prices to be more competitive. Good luck!
	How To Launch A Successful WSO \| WSO Of The Day \| 2941 Power Swipes To Improve Your Writing!

05-11-2009, 02:28 PM	#4
lenlatimer HyperActive Warrior War Room Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Valley Glen, CA USA. Posts: 184 Thanks: 4 Thanked 15 Times in 14 Posts	Re: NON-NATIVE SPEAKER: Please critique my "Warriors For Hire" offer I agree, I would suggest you hire one of the Warriors - let them interview you and write your copy. Nothing wrong with having visual talents, and you do. For a WSO you should probably offer 50% off or there abouts. It is a little high for the beginners but not unreasonable. Good luck.
	Len Latimer Copy-In-A-Box, an amazing Word Add-in Tool that adds Dazzle & Personality to your copy. My WSO

05-11-2009, 02:36 PM	#5
Valentine Active Warrior War Room Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Helsinki/Finland Posts: 79 Thanks: 20 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Contact Info	Re: NON-NATIVE SPEAKER: Please critique my "Warriors For Hire" offer Thank you warriors! Is there anyone who is interested in helping me writing a nice copy, and what would be your price? BTW, this is not a WSO, but a normal offer. But I was planning to run a WSO with a 30-40% discount, I'm not sure if I'm ready yet, but I might take 5 customers, so keep an eye on the WSO section.
	"Another one of those things that keep people from taking action on anything is because every time you look into something, its already been done!" (c) shanerbock (War Room Forum)

05-11-2009, 04:31 PM	#6
Cherilyn Woodhouse Formerly Cherilyn Lester War Room Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Chilliwack, BC, Canada Posts: 2,215 Blog Entries: 1 Thanks: 78 Thanked 257 Times in 67 Posts Social Networking Contact Info	Re: NON-NATIVE SPEAKER: Please critique my "Warriors For Hire" offer Wow, you're a kick-ass graphic designer that is for sure. Perhaps one of the copywriters in here (cough maybe me cough) would be willing to give it a quick run-over for persuasion, spelling, and grammar in exchange for some design work???
	Take your product from idea to profit in less than 90 days! Work with me to develop and implement a step-by-step plan for success! Coaching & Consulting @ BCWebMedia.com

05-12-2009, 03:45 AM	#7
Dmitry HyperActive Warrior Join Date: Sep 2008 Posts: 371 Thanks: 74 Thanked 15 Times in 11 Posts	Re: NON-NATIVE SPEAKER: Please critique my "Warriors For Hire" offer I think your art skills are pretty darn fine man! I have an idea about your copy... why don't you remove it? People are already searching for this, it's not like you have to push and sell them anything... just make the prices real cheap for the first 5 - a WSO. Get testimonials. Then increase the price a bit for the next 5. Get testimonials. And so on. Make your initial prices maybe 75% - 90% off. Yes, you must give first to receive. But this will build a strong portfolio for you here. People will love you. Then they'll be comfortable spending more with you. Make an offer too good to refuse and you don't need any sales copy.

05-12-2009, 10:28 AM	#10
Valentine Active Warrior War Room Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Helsinki/Finland Posts: 79 Thanks: 20 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Contact Info	Re: NON-NATIVE SPEAKER: Please critique my "Warriors For Hire" offer By the way guys, I've launched my offer in the "Warrior For Hire" section. Good news is that I've lowered my price to a bare minimum but for the first 5 lucky warriors only. http://www.warriorforum.com/warriors...er-inside.html - Valentine
	"Another one of those things that keep people from taking action on anything is because every time you look into something, its already been done!" (c) shanerbock (War Room Forum)