You'll feel like a Buddhist Monk by helping improve my copy
My copy is intended for small business owners and professionals (dentists, psychologists, attorneys, etc).
To compliment my sales calls and door-to-door prospecting, I'm preparing an email and sales letter campaign.
I started an other thread, asking advice for the subject line. Here's what I have for the actual body of the email/letter. Please, critique as harshly as possible.
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Hello [last name of prospect],
I'm a web developer and here's how I can grow your business:
- A website designed to convert targeted traffic.
- Blog sites that appear on first page of Google (6 new blog sites per month).
- Twitter and Facebook account set up and management.
- Branded videos uploaded to YouTube (4 new videos per month).
- Online press releases, participation in local discussion forums, and other innovative ways to engage your local customers.
Pricing is simple:
- A One-time fee for website design starting at $350.
- A monthly fee which includes website content management and all internet marketing (blog sites, SEO, Twitter, YouTube videos, etc) starting at $700 per month - no contract.
Contact me for a free consultation on how I can help grow your business with internet marketing.
All the best,
My name
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A lot of offline warriors here agree specifying prices is not a good idea. I don't have a track record, and feel far more comfortable giving an idea of the prices (starting prices at least).
I also decided to include specific numbers (ie: "6" blog sites, "4" YouTube videos) -- reason behind it: I feel business owners with little knowledge of the internet will feel more comfortable being told such details in sales letter.
The no contract - I know it's very ill-advised. This will only apply to my first 2-3 clients.
The opening "here's how I can grow your business" -- would really love feedback on this. Besides the subject line, this is possibly the most crucial part of the copy, and I feel it can greatly improve.
Any advice and time out of your busy schedule is greatly appreciated. Thanks!
*Breakthrough Marketing Blog (+ goodies) *
CopyWriting Services
*Breakthrough Marketing Blog (+ goodies) *
CopyWriting Services
Whatever you need, my high converting copy puts more money in your pocket. PM for details. 10 years experience and 9 figure revenues.
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