Take a look at my salesletter and tell me what you think

Well I am not a professional copywriter, but I don't think it matters.

The reason I say that is because the grammar you use is not going to cut it. It is full of spelling mistakes, you repeat words and even partial sentences over and over again, like:

I would suggest either A) getting someone to go through it and make the necessary changes, and there are going to be a lot of them, or B) get someone else to write it for you.

The thing is that you didnt just make a few mistakes, it seems you have trouble with grammar and overall sentence structure, so I dont see any other options.

As for the copywriting, I dont think it is going to cut it either. I am not a girl, so I dont know what goes through their heads when they break up with someone, but I am going to guess it is not what you have written.

What do these girls want most, except for their getting their boyfriend back? Is it to prove him wrong? prove her friends wrong? To get back to normal? To not be alone? Once you figure that you will be in a much better position to structure your offer.

And with your headling, what about just a qualifying question, like


OR

"Getting lost lovers back" is a pretty common theme over at clickbank these days. I recommend you go over there, look at some of their sales letters, gather ideas for your own, and pick it up from there.

I think the sales letter is kind of short and doesn't really connect emotionally with your potential customer

You're pretty far off the mark with this. It needs to be scrapped and recreated. You should consider hiring a professional. One other thing, if the ebook is written like the sales page you're going to be issuing a lot of refunds. Good luck.

Yep, you are singing out of tune.

I love the topic but you are killing yourself right from the start.

If you really want to learn how to do this and perhaps make some money -

1. Get an honest review of your book. Something tells me it isn't as good as it should be (I'm being nice here)
2. Scrap your salesletter and have a pro write it. The niche your selling to is filled with stone-cold direct marketing geniuses.
3. If you have a passion for this topic - become an affiliate of a top Clickbank seller and get a feel for the market. Make some cash and then take what you've learned to make a better product.

Good luck

Stan

P.S. If somebody sold you a PLR book and told you that you could easily make cash by writing a short salesletter to promote it - contact the guru - cuss 'em out and ask for your cash back.