Give Me a Review of My Mircro-C Site and Get a FREE CD!

by 7secretstrategies

Posted: 14 years ago 9 replies

COPY WRITING

Hello Fellow Warriors,

I have recently finished my first official internet marketing website which in micro-continuity/membership site structure. I'm offering a free CD + shipping that moves them into my Expert Interview Series that has a monthly charge and an upsell to my 7 day online e-course for life coaches.

I would love your feedback, input both positive and negative on what can be improved for my upcoming launch at the end of the month so that its 100% ready for my affiliates to promote.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this post and to helping me out by passing on your knowledge

. After taking a look at you can get a FREE CD of the "7 Biggest 99% Mistakes Coaches and Practitioners Make" that hold them back from ever having enough clients.

My website can be found melkotlyar.com
Thanks again, all the best - Allen Kotlyar, Affiliate Manger

#copy critique #copywriting advice #free #give #mircroc #review #site

Nicola Lane 14 years ago

Here is a clickable link:

Client4Coaches - Marketing For Hypnotists, Practitioners, and Coaches: Get More Clients
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Sam Mlambo 14 years ago

A couple of suggestions for your squeeze page...

1. A rewording of your main headline "The 7 Biggest Mistakes Coaches, NLP Practitioners,And Hypnotherapists Make That Ensures They're Underpaid, Overworked and Never Have Enough Clients To Pay The Bills..."

2. Would be more effective to make the benefit in your 2nd headline measurable. ie where it says "Even if you have zero.... in no time flat!" Instead no time flat you could use a specific time frame.

3. Within your copy state a reason why you're giving away this information for free

4. Whenever get some, add testimonials to the page.

Hope that helps

- Sam
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travlinguy 14 years ago

There's a lot of room for improvement. The header graphic is too big and is stealing a lot of valuable real estate on your page. The same goes for your headline. The headline is also too long and rambles. The idea is to get to the point.

There's a lot of debate over this but I HATE video or audio that starts without me starting it. I ALWAYS click away and there are plenty of others who do the same. There are far too many offers out there for me to have someone shouting at me before I even know what they have.

Ideally, you want your opt-in box above the fold. The fold is the top part of your page that the visitor sees without having to scroll down. That's why all that wasted space up top is so important.

Your copy isn't bad but it isn't great either. Some of the wording is a bit awkward and could use some editing. Good luck.
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peter_act 14 years ago

I felt the sales page was entirely wrong for the target market. It would be OK for a "make money online" market, but not for a market of professionals, who I think would appreciate a more subdued approach.
For the same reason, I didn't like the header graphic of dollar bills.
I don't want to be too discouraging, as I'm sure you're very proud of it, but you did ask for an opinion.
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The Copy Nazi Banned 14 years ago

Where's Harlan when you need him.

But yeah...as my esteemed colleague Travelinguy has said - that banner is a stinker. The headline doesn't really work - "The 7 Biggest Mistakes..." has been flogged to death. The video seems too earnest. The body copy is amateurish.

Let's see what Harlan has to say. Maybe you should PM him.
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- GuerrillaIM 14 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Metronicity
  
  Let's see what Harlan has to say. Maybe you should PM him.
  
  I asked him what he thought of the NLP section in "Web Copy That Sells" a while back on the old forum, then a few days later saw a video on his blog of him ripping the pages out of the book hehe. Treat with kid gloves lol.
  
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J. Barry Mandel 14 years ago

If this is what your optin page looks like then I can only imagine that your sales letter also needs much fixing as well, unless you hired a pro to write it for you.

If your launch is in 30 days and your sales letter is a stinker then it's not going to be much of a launch

Best of Luck!
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- Bill Jeffels 14 years ago
  
  As Mal pointed out, I wouldn't go with the " Biggest Mistakes " point of view.
  
  You would be better off leading with a Big Benefit.
  
  Bill
  
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  7secretstrategies 14 years ago
  
  I wanted to say thank you to everybody for your input!
  
  This is my first online marketing type of website and from the past year of studying and knowledge I have gained on online marketing & copy writing, which is only at its beginning levels, this is the best product I have been able to create so far.
  
  So I'm open, ready to work on it, am not emotionally attached to it or the design, and am very coachable on being told what needs to happen to make this website a winner, since I have already put so much time and effort into it already I'm ready for it pay a return on my labor.
  
  I know there is a large leap that happens from taking information from theory in an e-book/online course to actually applying it and making it a professional grade project that converts, causes the cash register to ring, and can lives up to its true earning potential. So that is why I am coming to you guys!
  
  What ever I have to do to make it polished for our upcoming launch I'll do. I can push back the date with our affiliates (currently around 45 solid JV's in our field), since I want to make sure that the page they send their peps to causes them to take action when they see it. Let me know what I need to do to have them opt-in at greater amount and then on the sales page to at least request the free CD.
  
  I want to learn from people just like yourself who are currently making money online and can be a role model for where I want our company's online presence to soon be at.
  
  However you can help would be greatly appreciated. The more specific your recommendations the better so I can alter the page to reflex your advice.
  
  So what do you think I should do next? Are there just a few tweaks that need to happen to it as a foundation, or does it need a major overhaul?
  
  ---
  (additional information)
  
  Right now we have a few people opting in each day (not as much as I would like) and atm around 8 people (personal contacts) who have requested the CD and are now in your expert interview series.
  
  From the small amount of potential clients in our niche who have seen the site they think its great, 100% better than most of the website in our field.
  
  Though I don't think that is good enough, we are getting traffic (not a lot) but not a lot of opt-ins (about 32 opt-ins off of 172 unique views) So I feel the page needs to be improved. Since most of our future promotions is going to be done through this micro-c site it need to be legit and fine tuned to perfection.
  
  P.S - We have already recorded/designed our Free CD of the 7 biggest mistakes coaches make so we sort of have to head that route for right now or would have to scrap the whole thing.
  
  Thanks
  
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