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1 in 70 Conversion Rate - What Would You Change?

by ragstworiches
17 replies
Hi,

I've just released my new football betting service. I was expecting higher conversions, and have used similar sales page layout/structure before.

I wonder if any copywriting gurus can spot anything on this page that is causing the issue.

I would like a 1 in 30 conversion, but I would be happy with 1 in 50.

My sales page can be viewed below

Football Betting System & Tips - 819% Profit In Just Two Years!

Kind Regards, Phil
#change #conversion #rate
  • Profile picture of the author Andrew Gould
    Hi Phil,

    I've read your page and I don't really know what it is you're actually selling. Your offer isn't clear at all.

    Is it for the beginner? The expert?

    If it's for a beginner then your odds (1.6-2.2) don't mean anything and I don't have a clue what backing or laying systems are.

    Break up your paragraphs more.

    Cut down your testimonials and give them a headline.

    Hide your highlighter.

    It seems like there might be monthly charges?? You really need to clarify that or you will get an awful lot of annoyed customers.

    You don't really go into much detail on the benefits.

    You use 'I' and 'We' without defining either.

    Hope some of this helps.
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  • Profile picture of the author Hans Klein
    Hi Phil,

    Here are a few notes:

    * What's compelling about a 28 year old football fanatic... or why would this lead you to be able to develop a surefire betting system? Lots of folks are football fanatics, but that doesn't make them betting experts. I think you can strengthen this a lot. If you look at a lot of the top sellers in Clickbank, they often use the angle that the system came from mathematics PHD... or someone who is an expert at numbers.

    You've got to convince folks that there is a "hack"... a surefire, shortcut way to consistently win.

    * I am not sure the chart at the top is credible enough to act as proof. Show long-term and consistent income coming your way... even better, show proof it came from your betting activities (maybe it's a receipt you receive).

    * Spend more time on the intro by continuing the conversation in their mind. Maybe they've tried other systems, but they were too hard or didn't work. I don't know what the big pain is, but this is something you research and you likely already have an idea from experience.

    * Highlight the results aspects of your testimonials... make sure browsers can see this.

    Study other top selling CB betting products and you can see where yours is weak.

    Best of luck!
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  • Profile picture of the author jbode
    Could you provide more of an instant solution than a 9 month solution?

    Instead of telling them right away what your 'system' does, why not give them a good piece of information to prove you're an expert, or start off with a quick story to relate yourself to your readers (how you lost money before you developed this system)
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  • Profile picture of the author J. Barry Mandel
    I don't mean to sound unfair but if the rest of your page is like your headline and subhead then you will need to change the whole letter to get higher conversions.

    Best of Luck!
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  • Profile picture of the author dannyadams
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    • Profile picture of the author Andrew Gould
      Originally Posted by dannyadams View Post

      With all the "experts" in here, no one picked up on my two points....interesting.
      Well spotted.

      I didn't even check.

      But I was offering a few minutes of my time for free, just to help out a fellow warrior.

      If you read through some of the other threads like this, the OP usually gets a variety of advice with different people pointing out different things. The aim is to help the OP, not to put down other people because they didn't pick up on what you did.

      And I don't think anyone on this forum would advocate changing anything, regardless of traffic and conversion, without some sort of split-test first.
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    • Profile picture of the author AwesomePossum
      Originally Posted by dannyadams View Post


      Two, as a business person, your conversion rate makes no difference if you just launched the product today. 1 in 70 is nothing. Maybe if you were 100 in 7000 then you might think of changing something.

      I think changing something after 70 visitors is a HUGE mistake in my opinion. I'd wait until you have a few thousand before messing with it.


      With all the "experts" in here, no one picked up on my two points....interesting.
      Well said...I completely agree. As a trader you should understand how variance works ; )

      With that said I think you could improve on certain things:

      I think you should gear this toward beginners...especially if your building up to 500 Euros from scratch...

      With that said you can change a lot of things.


      I mean instead of saying Every match, every tournament, everyday you can talk about how it's important to learn "universal" betting systems so you can understand the basics of trading and talk about how that system is perfect for beginners AND THEN to build into special systems for leagues, tourneys, team, etc...

      It's always important to master the core fundamentals of the trading...

      Just show how everything is ideal for beginners...build off of that.

      Don't try to give the customers everything...

      Build a beginner system and then an advanced one...

      Work things like that..

      You get higher conversions & you make more money...because you're focusing in on certain skill levels.

      Making a superstar system always kills your conversions...especially if you're selling it cheap.

      Aaryn
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    • Profile picture of the author Daniel Soulsby
      Originally Posted by dannyadams View Post

      Two, as a business person, your conversion rate makes no difference if you just launched the product today. 1 in 70 is nothing. Maybe if you were 100 in 7000 then you might think of changing something.

      I think changing something after 70 visitors is a HUGE mistake in my opinion. I'd wait until you have a few thousand before messing with it.
      Well it was launched Thursday, and as of midnight saturday it had 5000 unique visitors, the price has gone up and I have tweaked the site a bit and now it converts at an average of about 1 in 50, that doesnt mean we have had 50 visiors and one sale, it means on average 1 in 50 people are buying, lol, if we only had a few visitors on launch day it wouldnt be much of a launch would it!
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    • Profile picture of the author Ashley Gable
      Originally Posted by dannyadams View Post


      Two, as a business person, your conversion rate makes no difference if you just launched the product today. 1 in 70 is nothing. Maybe if you were 100 in 7000 then you might think of changing something.

      I think changing something after 70 visitors is a HUGE mistake in my opinion. I'd wait until you have a few thousand before messing with it.


      With all the "experts" in here, no one picked up on my two points....interesting.
      Well it may have something to do with the fact that half of your argument is based on an extreme ... hum ... "misinterpretation" of 1 in 70.

      As the op has already pointed out that doesnt mean he only has had 70 visitors and one sale.

      This may be some far out on the edge thinking but maybe, just maybe the "experts" realized that ... and therefore found no reason to comment on it!
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      • Profile picture of the author dannyadams
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        • Profile picture of the author Daniel Scott
          Originally Posted by dannyadams View Post

          The OP said nothing like that at all. Someone else jumped in and said something AFTER I put up my post...but the OP never said anything about the number of visitors they are receiving.

          What the op said was "1 in 70 conversion - What should I change" (thread title)

          And my response to that was NOTHING. If it were 7,000 visitors with a 1 in 70 rate, maybe look to change.

          I also pointed out that the "beta tester" emails were from the day before I replied and that could be a bit of a problem.

          Yes, BOTH of those points were missed by the "expert copywriters".

          And YES, both of those points are extremely important.
          People LOVE new and cutting-edge.

          I'll grant it's POSSIBLE the date on the emails hurt conversions... but I seriously doubt it.

          If anything for a betting system I think people would WANT to get in quickly.

          The point about 1:70 seemed to be something you kind of jumped to conclusions about.

          At least... that's the way I read it... and judging by responses I wasn't the only one.

          So I don't think it's "interesting"... as much as you picking up on things that aren't as important as you think they are.

          -Dan
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        • Profile picture of the author Ashley Gable
          Originally Posted by dannyadams View Post

          The OP said nothing like that at all. Someone else jumped in and said something AFTER I put up my post...but the OP never said anything about the number of visitors they are receiving.

          What the op said was "1 in 70 conversion - What should I change" (thread title)

          And my response to that was NOTHING. If it were 7,000 visitors with a 1 in 70 rate, maybe look to change.

          I also pointed out that the "beta tester" emails were from the day before I replied and that could be a bit of a problem.

          Yes, BOTH of those points were missed by the "expert copywriters".

          And YES, both of those points are extremely important.
          Once again you have jumped on something without really looking at it. The "other" person, at least to me, isnt just some other person, if you go back and reread his posts you will find that he is some sort of partner to the OP.

          So yes, in essence the OP, or at least the party concerned, did in fact clear up the ratio misunderstanding.

          As for your comment about looking at the page from a buyers point of view, yeah I dont have a problem with that, I think the problem arose from your attitude.

          I am not a professional copywriter but I sometimes comment on things I see, but I would never draw attention to the fact that the "experts" didnt catch it.

          99% of the time the sales letter needs a lot more than just a few posts to fix it, we all know that, that is why we just kind of take a quick look and post our thoughts ... not all of them, just a few.

          I doubt you will find anyone willing to give a full critique without any sort of compensation.

          So instead everyone chips in with a few constructive points that the OP can use.

          Ashley
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  • Profile picture of the author Nick Brighton
    Critical info needed:

    1. How long are your visitors staying on your page?

    (If the average time on site is less than a few seconds, then you know the top fold of the page is doing something wrong)

    2. Are your visitors clicking links to your blog or other pages? What are they doing?

    (The reason I ask, is because your header links could be distracting people. If I see a blog, I might assume the info can be found there, or just be curious and want to see what's over there, and forget to come back.)

    Secondly, your headlines need some work:

    "28 Year Old Football Fanatic Reveals How He Made £24,057 Profit In Just 9 Months Using His Secret Formula"

    - Good for him. What about ME? And £24,057 in 9 months sounds like a lot of hard work and capital needed to get to that point, IMO.
    - Secret Formula is cheesy, and way too vague. Specificity is crucial in today's competitive landscape, especially in your particular market.

    "Finally After Two Years Of Testing I Am Ready To Life The Lid On My Cash Churning Football Betting System & Allow You To Share My Success of 819% returns..."

    - What does life the lid mean?
    - Churning implies that cash is going around and around, and being chewed up. Not the image I want of my money, going in or coming out of a system
    - Why would I want to share YOUR success? I want my own success, my own money...not some of yours, which is what this implies

    Your sentiment is right, but the words and phrases you are using subtly paint the wrong picture IMO.

    I didn't have time to read the rest, but I think if you get the headline sorted, you'll probably get more readership and subsequently, more buyers.
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  • Profile picture of the author ragstworiches
    Hi Warriors,

    Just seen the replies, some great input thanks, I'll try a few things out and report back if anything was successful.

    Thank you, Phil
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  • Profile picture of the author RentItNow
    Looks good except that huge header and the typo in the subheader (life instead of lift).
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    I have no agenda but to help those in the same situation. This I feel will pay the bills.
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  • Profile picture of the author Daniel Scott
    In my experience 2% CR is pretty low for this niche... especially for a launch.

    I think this letter is missing a lot of stuff... where's the empathy? The agitation of the prospect's pain?

    There are also a lot of issues with the writing itself... syntax.. readability... that sort of thing.

    There's no story of how you stumbled upon this method... no credibility... and no close.

    In short... this thing is bare-bones... which is why I think your conversions are hurting so much.

    Kind regards,

    -Dan
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    • Profile picture of the author Daniel Soulsby
      Originally Posted by Daniel Scott View Post

      In my experience 2% CR is pretty low for this niche... especially for a launch.

      I think this letter is missing a lot of stuff... where's the empathy? The agitation of the prospect's pain?

      There are also a lot of issues with the writing itself... syntax.. readability... that sort of thing.

      There's no story of how you stumbled upon this method... no credibility... and no close.

      In short... this thing is bare-bones... which is why I think your conversions are hurting so much.

      Kind regards,

      -Dan
      Hi

      I agree thanks, to be honest this launch was a bit rushed, only 2 months from our last one. Phil doesn't have much copywriting experience and he wrote the sales page because I didnt have time.

      Nest time we will get a real copywritter because to be honest it would have more than paid for it's self on this project, I think we could have got at least double the sales with a good sales page, which would have paid for a copywriter a few times over.

      <edit> then again Phil did very well with the last project getting better than 1 / 20 conversions over 50,000 uniques, not just the launch, I think he connects more with casino players than sports gamblers because he really into casino.

      I connect better with sports bettors because thats where I started out and thats where my experinece is. Next time we will sort it out anyway, this is a quality product and service and will do very well in the long term. </edit>
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  • Profile picture of the author Daniel Scott
    Danny,

    First of all... I have a track record.

    I've produced hundreds of thousands... maybe even millions of dollars for my clients.

    So please... don't tell me I don't know what I'm talking about here.

    Like I said... you could be right... but I doubt it.

    Thousands flock to new programs on their first day of release... and I'll bet this one is no different.

    Regarding the 1:70 thing... it doesn't actually mean one buyer out of seventy visitors.

    It means that's an average... a conversion rate.

    Some people talk in %... some people use a ratio.

    That's why I'm saying you jumped to conclusions... because you assumed he'd only sent 70 visitors (or at least, your post read that way).

    -Dan

    P.S. The most expensive copywriting course I have was like $27 from Paul Myers. The rest is stuff I got off Amazon. Unless you count Vin's coaching... that's a bit more than $27.
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  • Profile picture of the author seobro
    Hi rags:

    Typically, the problem is that people will ask me - "If your system works so well then why ain't you rich?" There is a bit of disbelief in the population so they are hard to convince.

    OK, I believe that very doable number is one in nine. I am getting for one of my sites one in seven.

    Well, your problem is price. It is over 50 dollars and people are poor. They fear losing their money. Create a cheap intro course. That will give you more leads and lower the bar of entry for your consumers.
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