Please can you take a look at my sales page?

I thought the beginning was pretty effective, but then you lost me.

First, the recession really is hitting people hard, so I think it's a mistake to say it isn't.

Second, the bulleted list on what you'll get in this report seems tailor made for the rich. It's mostly about investing money. The first bulleted item hints at something the reader could do as a business, but it's just too vague to have impact. The rest of the bullets are about investing and taking cheap vacations.

You also need at least three strong testimonials with full names and locations. You may want to offer a few copies for free (maybe as a WSO?) in exchange for honest feedback and permission to use the positive feedback as a testimonial with full name and location. I suggest you offer more than three copies to be sure you get at least three strong testimonials.

I'd like to hear what others say, as people who are feeling the recession but not enough to keep them from new investments may have a different view.

Best of luck!

Janet

It's all too vague, very skimpy on "reason why."

Go ahead and test. But I'd look at an angle like certain insiders actually look forward to recessions -- wouldn't you like to know what they know?

The problem is who are you to credibly make such claims. You don't say. My guess is you didn't just get fired by a famous investment bank after having made $3,478,362.17 in performance bonuses or you would have said so.

But nothing is stopping you from finding someone like that, and interviewing them.

So, your challenge is getting people to believe you can deliver the goods. If you've studied the right insiders, explain your research, then people might find you credible. And of course, you have no testimonials, the page has zero information value, and so on.

Anyone can throw up a page and make a lot of claims. You need some proof.

Hey thanks for the replies!!

The target I've got is people who are stocks & forex investors - people with a few dollars to throw at investments if needed.

The report is only meant to be a simple thing that outlines what they can do to profit from a recession - nothing major and certainly no "secrets" (that's why it's $15).

My angle with the sales page wasn't to offer any sort of promises of "get rich quick" type schemes - it was more an outline of how they can make the recession into a profitable time.

From your replies - it looks like I've got to make it more specific and less promise?

Maybe I'll shelve the report and work on a more specific one?

R