Prom Dress - Any Suggestions For Copy?

10 replies
Hi All,

Anyone got any suggestions for the copy below for a short sales video?

I don't know anything about proms. I'm going after the keyword "cheap prom dresses".

Thanks!
Max

SALES VIDEO SCRIPT
A pretty prom dress may look real expensive, but it doesn't have to be.
You can get a beautiful dress for way less than what you can expect to pay.
You will look fabulous in this satin chiffon full length gown.
Your prom date will be impressed.
Almost 50 users have given this dress four and a half stars out of five.
Here's some of what they had to say.

I have to admit that we were surprised at how beautiful it was. The color is one of the prettiest reds I have
ever seen... never looked better! H. Holm
It's a perfect fit. The color is bright and beautiful. The best part of all is that the dress can be handwashed
which saves time and money. I absolutely love the fit and flow of this gown. V.R. Neu
When I opened the package, the dress was neatly folded. .. I took one look of this dress and I was
shocked. It was absoultely stunning!!! W. McGill
And how much would this cost?
Certainly for less than a hundred after a huge discount, which you can get by going to the link below.
Prom is that one night where you can look and feel like a Princess, is an evening of romance and celebration.
You can find an elegant dress and feel fabulous in it, while staying within your budget.
Dress to impress without breaking the bank.
Make that one night a night to remember.
The perfect dress is just a click away.
Click the blue link you see at the bottom of this video.
#copy #dress #prom #suggestions
  • Profile picture of the author Stephen Dean
    Check out Ross' commercials, they have the same angle.

    There's a fine line you've gotta walk - because they may want a cheap prom dress but they don't want anyone to know it's cheap. So you might address that a bit more in the copy.

    Notice the first commercial in this series of Ross commercials...


    The viewer is undoubtedly surprised to see it's a Ross commercial.

    Cheers,
    Stephen Dean
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  • Profile picture of the author Traci
    I'd put the talk about pricing and how inexpensive the dresses can be at the end of the video. A girl want's to feel like a princess in her prom dress, even if she ends up getting a red silky dress that her parents are afraid to let out of the house in. When shopping for a prom dress, she imagines walking into the prom and everyone stopping to stare at her in her dress. She wants her date to say how beautiful she is, her friends to ask her where she got it and how much it cost, and all the girls who have ever been snobby to her to see her in a new light.

    Think about movies, like "She's All That." It's all about the girl wanting to be the prettiest, best looking girl there. And they all know that the music isn't gonna stop, prince charming isn't going to sweep them off their feet and the snobby girls are still going to be snobby the next day...but it's the illusion that all the big things are possible that night.

    Help any? lol
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    • Profile picture of the author Stephen Dean
      That sounds exactly right, Traci.

      The only thing I'd add is that he's aiming for people who are searching for "cheap prom dresses." So they are specifically looking for a low price, but they don't want anyone else to know that.

      The commercial does a good job of showing glamour... then revealing low, low price.

      Cheers,
      Stephen
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  • Profile picture of the author MNelson
    Max,

    I agree with Traci, but would add that prom night for most girls is the romantic highlight of their year. Start by engaging her fantasy for the perfect romantic night and how this dress is the dress for the occasion. Use powerful emotional words that convey love, moonlit nights, and magical moments. Romance, not sex, that feeling of being the center of attention and the one girl in the room that every guy wants to dance with. She may not be that girl, but she can certainly feel that way in the dress.

    Then mention that she can be all that without having to pay an arm and a leg. You are selling to girls and their mothers. The girls will relate to the romance. The mothers will relate to the low price while being happy that their daughters can have the best prom experience at the same time.

    All the best,
    Monica
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  • Profile picture of the author RickDuris
    The ideas offered are outstanding.

    What I have to say may or may not be applicable. I have a few gown designers and boutiques as Clients (in other words, not online.)

    They also sell prom gowns.

    1. Prom gowns are a seasonal sale.

    2. FWIW, there are definitive trends, fashions and styles every year for prom gowns. Those should be factored into your videos.

    3. On of the most important attributes of a prom gown for a girl is color. I have watched more than my share of mothers and daughters discussing (arguing over) color.

    4. While the girls want the hottest dresses, the decision remains up to the Mother.

    5. Accessories like matching shoes, purses and jewelry are a great upsell.

    - Rick Duris
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    • Profile picture of the author NewbieWarrior
      Thank you Stephen, Traci, Monica and Rick for your outstanding feedback.

      I incorporated your comments into my video script. I went ahead and created a mock video based on it. The video is just a draft at this stage.

      I will get a professional voice over for the narration after I fine tune the wording. You'll see that I've incorporated your ideas into the video.

      Because I have less than 15 posts in the Warrior Forum, my links are disallowed in this reply here. But if you want to see my prom dress video, search for

      "Prom Dress Test Video"

      in youtube and my video comes out at the very top, with the lady in blue.
      (The username is affordablepromdress, just as confirmation. If you reply in this thread, you could help me embed it for convenience of others.)

      Any further ideas, please let me know.

      A huge heap of thanks to you all.

      Cheers,
      Max
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  • Profile picture of the author Scott Saylor
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    • Profile picture of the author NewbieWarrior
      I think you should know a little about proms. Scott
      Being out of the US (in Australia) I kinda know and don't know about proms. I've not been to one, but I can guess what the experience is like. I must say, Stephen, Traci, Monica and Rick's feedback above are dynamite. They help me get into the mind of the female prospect. That's another point, I don't have the hormones. Never hurts to ask, and in this case I've been amply rewarded.

      Cheers,
      Max
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  • Profile picture of the author evanlambda
    Google ranks related search terms accordingly. For example, the word cheap has negative connotations (e.g. low quality). Use phrases like "inexpensive prom dresses" and you can still rank for your desired phrase.
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    • Profile picture of the author NewbieWarrior
      ...cheap has negative connotations... Google ranks related search terms accordingly
      Thanks, didn't know that. I didn't like the phrase but chose it because of search volume.
      Max
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