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Hits aren't converting???

by jestershaw
4 replies
I was told this is the place to post issues about my sales page not converting.

I would love if some of my fellow warriors would please check out my sales page and give me so much needed feedback.

gptriches.com

I have had a lot of good comments in the main forum but I was told to come here for "copy" feedback.

Thanks
Shawn
#converting #hits
  • Profile picture of the author dburk
    Hi jestershaw,

    When I click the buy now link nothing happens. I'm sure that would hurt your conversions. Fix that right away.

    I peeked at your code and see that you used Word to create the page. The code is a mess and you really need to clean that up.

    Once that issue is fixed, I think you should experiment with different headlines and different calls to action.

    Try "Get Paid Now!" instead of "Buy Now!". Try a nice big color button instead of a text link.

    Experiment with different headlines, this can have a huge impact.

    Add code for a tracking service like like Google Analytics and test all these variations until you find a proven winner.

    Often what we think will work doesn't. The key is to test, test and test.
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    • Profile picture of the author ndcole78
      There are several problems with your letter. Firstly, you need new headlines.

      The next problem is that your sales letter is too short and needs to be re-written, plain and simple. Here's why: It's missing several elements that should be in a sales letter. Right now you don't have a sales letter, what you have is a note or a suggestion for someone to buy your product.

      You have to convince people to spend their money with you. And in order to get people to spend their money, you must first get them to spend their time. I lost interest in the headlines, so needless to say that I didn't want to invest my time.

      Just read through these 15 copywriting steps that I posted on the forum a few weeks ago and you'll see that your letter lacks about 12 of the 15 steps to copywriting success.

      Here's my post: http://www.warriorforum.com/copywrit...g-success.html


      If you want to let a pro write it up for you, just let me know.
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      • Profile picture of the author adaum
        Hey Shawn,

        You might want to spend a little time on this site as well.

        John Carlton's Big Damn Blog

        Andrew
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        • Profile picture of the author chief1
          Banned
          [DELETED]
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          • Profile picture of the author zapseo
            Not to be rude or anything....but where did you get the copy from ... a crackerjack box ?

            Seriously. It sounds like the trite copy on so many (no doubt hundreds, if not thousands, of sales letters.)

            You don't make sales by copying exactly what someone else does.

            Why?

            Because you have to have a unique selling proposition. They can buy stuff from the people you are copying -- who prolly have a number of other pieces in place for their sales process (e.g., where they get traffic, credibility, etc.)

            BTW -- I'm not sure if any of your images work at all.

            Your lead paragraph is this....

            Hi and welcome to my site. OK, I'm going to keep this short and sweet - I'm not going to bore you with the usual "rags-to-riches" story because I'm pretty sure you don't want to hear it.
            When I read that I feel insulted. You don't even care enough about me, and about the value of your product, to spend the time to tell me about it. It's a huge TURN OFF -- as does assuming whether I want to read your rtr story or not.

            Trust me -- enthusiasm sells -- and what you say above is the antithesis of enthusiasm.

            You should get some professional graphics done. Your page looks unprofessional, and therefore doesn't inspire confidence.

            Everything about your page suggests that you are simply interested in transferring money from my pocket to yours -- with no or little consideration for the value that you provide.

            Provide value, care about your customers, and they will buy from you in droves.

            If you don't care to do that, I don't really care to provide you comments on how to improve your sales letter (other than the ones I've given here.) I don't WANT to help people who aren't providing value to their customers. It's against my principles.

            Incidentally -- if you are comparing "hits" to sales, you are comparing the wrong thing. you need to compare "unique visitors" (which are measured, in part, by pageviews.) and NOT hits. Plenty of free info out on the 'net to explain the difference.
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