Landing Page Recommendations

5 replies
I'm trying to help a client get better results from his landing page.

This is the page:

Code:
http://dreamswing.com/promo/
I'm running a split test with one version containing links to a separate buy page and one version containing the purchase form at the bottom of the page. The original (control) is the one with the link instead of the form.

I'm about to open the program to a wide variety of affiliate networks, but thought it would be a good idea to see what you guys thought of the page.

Just FYI, I didn't write the copy or design it.

Current affiliate stats are 84 clicks and 1 purchase.
#landing #page #recommendations
  • Profile picture of the author Mike Mendell
    I don't mean to be offensive, but that entire page just looks really amateurish to me. I could point out all sorts of areas that need improvement, but I'd say it's just easier to start over from scratch.
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  • Profile picture of the author travlinguy
    The page has little or no eye appeal. There's no headline so there's no way to know what's going on. I know you have the autostart video but many, like me, (about half of your visitors will turn it off or just leave). I would have left immediately had this not been a critique request.

    I didn't read much of it but there are huge blocks of text, especially in the testimonial boxes. That text needs to be broken into bite sized bits. The pictures of the guy swinging are low res and close to useless other than giving the clue this thing has something to do with golf.

    There really isn't anything to test here because this page isn't ready for prime time at all. Good luck.
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  • Profile picture of the author Dean Jackson
    Gene, I only scanned it because there's almost nothing that grabs my attention in it.

    So I'm not going to judge the copy, but here are some design issues you need to work on:

    The "header" area is a waste of space and it's way too confusing. Just stick to the basics with the main headline leading to the rest of the copy.

    Get rid of the bright green colour, it's very hard on the eyes. Use white or navy blue instead.

    For some reason there are small "related" videos on top of the video at the top, even after it starts playing. I suggest you host it on Amazon S3 (there was another service that doesn't display obnoxious ads, but the name escapes me).

    Break up the chunks of text

    Use headlines for the johnson boxes where you have the "demonstration" images.

    The compass analogy is OK, but I'd get rid of that huge image at the top

    That should keep your client busy

    Dean
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  • Profile picture of the author Gene.Gerwin
    Great feedback guys.

    I agree that the overall look of the landing page needs to be improved... the huge text blocks are pretty overwhelming... a headline is needed... better images are needed... etc.

    Your comments will help my client see his landing page with fresh eyes... perhaps consider a complete redesign after we have more stats...
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