Please Critique my Sales Page

You need a headline.

The link you posted above... SEO Article Writing | Reid Writing and SEO Services...

...says more than your sales page.

haha good point - it does say 'SEO Article Writing' at the start of the page but it's not really much of a headline I agree. thanks!

Yes, it needs a headline.

I don't really care about the 1 Million words written. The monkeys in the back room chained to the typewriters can do that, too.

"Grade B articles" frighten me. They sound like eggs laid by that weird mutant chicken that are about to go sulfur on me at any time.

Now if you are trying to get people to choose the "Grade A articles", then having the Grade B option is great because of the way human beings make decisions.

I would make your testimonial in a larger font so it can be read.

See if you can install a widget that rotates testimonials.

I would find out three typical reasons why people choose to have your company write their articles, and put these up top.

I would've (and did) bounce right off the page. It just looks like another boring website.

You need an attention getting headline.

In my humble opinion, the only reason to have a word on a sales page is to get the person to read the next word, the next sentence, to keep them enticed until they think,

hmmm, may be interesting, I'll sign up to check it out.

I would put up a clean with no navigation sales page where they only thing the person can do is sign up...nothing else to click.

However, if you cannot do that, then give me a big red, attention getting headline that addresses some problem I have that you and only you can solve for me.

Good luck.

Thanks Kani and TopKat! Really helps

Let's see...

1. I like the logo, but the header seems to big. Either find a way to shrink it, or add more pages/links on the right and fill up the additional space.
2. Underneath the header, you need an attention grabbing headline all the way across. Either that, or move everything up. Too much white space that should be used.
3. Submit button is cut off on the bottom of form
4. Text needs to be re-worded in various areas, and the columns are lacking appeal
5. Get rid of the grades of articles. Call them something else. Never tell your customers that you're having non-English workers write stuff even if it's a discount. Sell them on the low price, and call it something else.
6. Along with 5, I might consider bunching all 3 grades into one price point, and use specific writers for each type of order.
7. The buy now buttons I would change into a simple buy or purchase button, and link to whatever payment processor you're using.
8. Instead of going down the page, try going across a little.
9. A lot of empty space on the bottom. Either move it up, or fill it up.

Good luck!

Your logo is crap, shadows look like in 2001 year.

When making a logo, focus just on ONE thing to make it different. Otherwise, it will look [logo] silly.

Thanks for all the input guys - I made some pretty big changes - I admit I'm no designer but I think this gets my point across a little better?

It still doesn't excite me. This really isn't a sales page. It has a mediocre headline now, at least, but the whole format still screams "Hi, I'm not a sales page!" You need something more traditional and proven.

The copy is drowsy and the three column setup at the bottom is both boring and against proven copy standards. It looks like a shopping page rather than a sales page. You need a sales letter, not this.

I hope this has helped, and best wishes.

-Zentech

I'm not a copywriter, so I won't address the page itself. But I had a look at the Grade B and Grade A samples, and I was very surprised by the poor grammar and misspellings. Even if I were only spending $10, I'd expect to receive a more polished and professional product.

If prospects are looking at the samples, they may be the cause of low sales volume.

First Of All - Thanks Everyone For All Of The Suggestions!

I've spent a bunch more time on this and I think I've got a more "pro" looking sales page now... Would love more feedback

I used OptimizePress this time around and I'm pretty happy with it. One of the main questions I have right now though is whether it is better to give the paypal buttons right on this page or have a big ORDER NOW button that takes them to an order page with pricing and such and leaving the pricing off the sales page totally...

The sales page confuses me. Too many elements on one page.
The testimonials could be put on another page.
You can convey the message of your service with fewer words.
The red arrow moving up and down annoys me... you can attract attention
to the optin all the same without that.

"Get on the list" is a blatant order / blackmail for $3 saving, I would not be interested. If people find your service offer interesting, they will want to try anyway.
You could look at other similar article writing services to see how they've tuned their page.

I hope you find my points of help.

Hey Dots,

Thanks... I'm pretty bad at this as I'm coming to find out But I've been tuning and testing based on Warriors suggestions and I found that getting rid of the different grades made a nice difference in conversions.

The opt-in rate is around 7.5% with that call to action so i'm sure i could probably do something with that as well - not sure how else to "blackmail" them though

What do I think about it?...


Not a lot Rob.

It's dreadfully, dreadfully boring. Nothing here to excite me in the slightest. No good reason for me to jump out of my seat, whack my head on the ceiling, come back down to earth, rub my head ruefully and think, "By gum! I must contact this geezer instantly."

The deflating balloon says it all as far as I'm concerned.

Where's the zest?

Where's the excitement?

Where, what is your USP?

It's failing on almost every front. Call yourself a writer? Sick and tired of current content writers online? Well, demonstrate it then. Dare to be different. Dare to make yourself stand out from the maddening crowd.

Differentiation is the key here. Something, anything which makes people bolt upright in their seats and go, "WOW! Gotta use this guy!"

Stick a piece of dynamite under your current excuse for sales copy, go back to the drawing board and start over again from scratch is my advice.

Think outside of the box.

Get creative and have fun with words.

If you do this enthusiastically your passion for writing hellishly good content will come shining right through your chosen written language of communication.

Result? You end up putting more profit back into your business.


Mark Andrews

Ouch!

Thanks Mark... will go back to the drawing board with your ideas in mind

not bad dude, i might even add more detail to the page, it seems incomplete

just a newbie observation here, although i have written 2 sales pages myself

i say keep testing and go with whatever your audience is telling you works (aka the version that converts best)