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HELP: Copywriters - Critique My Sales Letter.. Get Free Stuff!

by ExploringInfinity
2 replies
Hi Warriors, I'm planning my first WSO to be released by the end of the month.

I'd like some advice on improving my sales copy, which is attached below.

Anyone who helps me improve the sales copy is entitled to a free copy of the WSO, just PM me for it and I'll hook it up.

Here's a link to the draft of my sales copy:

RSS BEAST | RSS Beast

Please help me make this as successful as possible, I greaaatly appreciate all of your help in advance!!
#copywriters #critique #free #letter #sales #stuff
  • Profile picture of the author Andrew Gould
    Hi Mitch,

    I like it, it feels honest and your enthusiasm shines through.

    The biggest improvement you can make to it is simply adding proof, preferably before and after analytics screenshots.

    And make it clearer exactly what the offer is, at the moment it reads like I'd just be getting one 45 minute video. If that's right, I'd add a PDF to it as well for the people who don't like video.

    Your bullets could do with being expanded on and becoming more benefit focused. To do this, after your feature "One time set up" add on "so ___" and then fill in the blank.

    You can shorten your headline to something like "Never Worry About Traffic Again!" then directly underneath explain that all they need to do is a simple 30 minute process once and then they're sorted. As a pre-head possibly something along the lines of "Stop wasting your time with backlinks and..."

    I'd also consider not giving away MRR for it as it devalues the actual product.

    And when you say it's going to be "very, very inexpensive for a limited time" give a specific deadline (and dime-sales seem to work very well on the WF).

    Hope this helps.
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    Andrew Gould

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    • Profile picture of the author ExploringInfinity
      Thanks a lot of this advice, I think you're right about the MRR. I am looking for some way to create some kind of upsell, but I suppose that's not necessary for my first WSO.

      Screenshots would be a cool idea, I should work on getting some of those.

      The product is in fact a 45 minute video AND a 20 page .PDF .. I will make that more clear in the sales letter as well, the .PDF is actually the important part, and the video just walks through the process incase you're unsure how to complete a task.

      The rest of your tips, I am going to apply to the sales copy right away, thanks for the help! If you want a copy of the WSO for review, PM me!

      Originally Posted by Andrew Gould View Post

      Hi Mitch,

      I like it, it feels honest and your enthusiasm shines through.

      The biggest improvement you can make to it is simply adding proof, preferably before and after analytics screenshots.

      And make it clearer exactly what the offer is, at the moment it reads like I'd just be getting one 45 minute video. If that's right, I'd add a PDF to it as well for the people who don't like video.

      Your bullets could do with being expanded on and becoming more benefit focused. To do this, after your feature "One time set up" add on "so ___" and then fill in the blank.

      You can shorten your headline to something like "Never Worry About Traffic Again!" then directly underneath explain that all they need to do is a simple 30 minute process once and then they're sorted. As a pre-head possibly something along the lines of "Stop wasting your time with backlinks and..."

      I'd also consider not giving away MRR for it as it devalues the actual product.

      And when you say it's going to be "very, very inexpensive for a limited time" give a specific deadline (and dime-sales seem to work very well on the WF).

      Hope this helps.
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