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Looking for honest feedback on website

by SBCopywritingGuy
8 replies
Fellow copywriters,

We all know one of the best ways to improve our copy is to have a "fresh set of eyes" take a look at it.

So if you would, do me a favor and give me a little feedback on my new copywriting site.

And please...be HONEST.

I'm looking to get better...I don't want to be one of those writers who simply "has a website"...

Because I don't have a lot of posts (yet), the website is smallbusinesscopywritingguy.com

Thanks!
#feedback #honest #website
  • Profile picture of the author OutOfThisWord
    Can see you've put a lot of work in.

    But is there really a hook?

    Have you tapped into the emotional needs of small biz owners?

    You have only seconds to hook them or they swim away.

    Try removing stuff, one at a time, until you've got a crystal clear offer and a reason (reward) for reading further.

    You definitely have ability and talent, you just need to edit and refine more.

    Picture the prospect as someone you were just introduced to at a cocktail party and you've got only seconds to galvanize their interest, or they will say 'nice meeting you, excuse me while I get another drink.'

    Good luck!
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  • Profile picture of the author RickCopy
    I think theres just not enough to keep people reading in the beginning. People that know IM already know this stuff and seems noobish to them....the people that dont know IM dont really care and I feel you'll lose them with a lot of your terminology. IE if Im selling shoes at my store and Im also selling shoes on my website (that I probably dont understand and paid someone to put up)... would I REALLY know what content creation is? Copy? Do I care? I just care about selling shoes... how can you help me do that?

    Maybe start off with something more along the lines of "$XXX,XXX,XXX.XX worth of products were sold online last year. How much did YOU make from online sales?" essentially making the reader (hopefully your targeted business owner) think "I didnt sell #$%^ last year!...why not?!"

    ..and then you tell them why and what you can do to help them make 'da interweb moneyz.
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  • Profile picture of the author lexmar111
    The pop-up subscription form apeared and I could not see the rest of the website because it was imposible to close the pop-up. It is possible that my browser is bad or your website has serious issue and people cannot access it.
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  • Profile picture of the author Ken Hoffman
    Small business and copywriting don't go together. Small business owners don't usually know about copywriting. If going after that market talk about your advertising, marketing, or getting new customers.

    Since 2 out of 3 of your testimonials are in fitness...why not make that your niche? If not, you need to focus. Small biz, consultants, and info marketers are 3 entirely different areas.

    You need to focus. Even your free ebook offers online and offline solutions. The more specific you are the more you can charge and the more compelling you are to your chosen target market.

    I would eliminate the headline and whole first page. Start with your 2nd subhead as a headline "how to..." That is more specific and lends itself to a sales story. And the copy from that point is sales copy...before that, not so much.
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    • Profile picture of the author WittyBlogger
      Originally Posted by Ken Hoffman View Post

      Small business and copywriting don't go together. Small business owners don't usually know about copywriting. If going after that market talk about your advertising, marketing, or getting new customers.

      Since 2 out of 3 of your testimonials are in fitness...why not make that your niche? If not, you need to focus. Small biz, consultants, and info marketers are 3 entirely different areas.

      You need to focus. Even your free ebook offers online and offline solutions. The more specific you are the more you can charge and the more compelling you are to your chosen target market.

      I would eliminate the headline and whole first page. Start with your 2nd subhead as a headline "how to..." That is more specific and lends itself to a sales story. And the copy from that point is sales copy...before that, not so much.
      Ken took the words straight out of my mouth. Seconded.

      You need to pay heed to the specialization tip. Too many copywriters lose their heads writing a vast range of copy. It certainly helps to ease your research load and at the same time, increase sales copy conversions.

      -wittyblogger
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      7-figure entrepreneurs aren't made overnight. You can make money online with a full time income through blogging and making words crackle with energy. ;)
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    • Profile picture of the author SBCopywritingGuy
      Originally Posted by Ken Hoffman View Post

      Small business and copywriting don't go together. Small business owners don't usually know about copywriting. If going after that market talk about your advertising, marketing, or getting new customers.

      Since 2 out of 3 of your testimonials are in fitness...why not make that your niche? If not, you need to focus. Small biz, consultants, and info marketers are 3 entirely different areas.

      You need to focus. Even your free ebook offers online and offline solutions. The more specific you are the more you can charge and the more compelling you are to your chosen target market.

      I would eliminate the headline and whole first page. Start with your 2nd subhead as a headline "how to..." That is more specific and lends itself to a sales story. And the copy from that point is sales copy...before that, not so much.
      Thanks for the feedback Ken. I think I will sharpen my focus and go from there. Thanks!
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  • Profile picture of the author valuecreator
    Like Jerry Garcia said:

    "don't be the best at what you do, be the only one in the world who does what you do."

    My point is: What is your UNCOMMON OFFERING? Your big promess?

    It's all very good, but very bland. Feels like a lot of work to go through all of it. why don't you hook them up with a story?

    I would put a cool video right under a headline with a big promess. Bump all the rest of the copy way down. people scan, at first.

    test both version and see what converts. I already know because that's what I did...

    Also, you need a kick-ass pic for your free product at the right.

    you're almost there!

    seb
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  • Profile picture of the author Pathway Insurance
    I'm not a personal fan of "long copy" sales letters that I believe are a hallmark of Dan Kennedy proselytes, that go on and on and on. Business owners are super busy, so your sales message needs to be concise and to the point. As some one mentioned previously if you don't "hook" them immediately they will spit out the bait and swim after other tasty morsels.
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