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Hey guys,

Just kidding about the cookies...

But I just wrote my first full sales letter and I'm wanting to get some feedback. Have a look ==> Become an Article Marketing PRO within 30 minutes!

Thanks!
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  • Who are you?

    and

    Why should I believe you?
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    Marketing is not a battle of products. It is a battle of perceptions.
    - Jack Trout
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    • Profile picture of the author Ryan Dodson
      Originally Posted by Joe Ditzel View Post

      Who are you?

      and

      Why should I believe you?
      The people that see this page are already on my list, so they already know these things.

      However, even if I were to release this to the public (i.e. people who aren't on my list), I've been told many times that people don't care about who you are. They just want to know what problem you're offering to solve and how long it will take.

      Maybe so, maybe not - again, that's what I've been told.

      Either way, I guess I'll split-test it to see what results I come up with.
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      • Profile picture of the author videolover7
        Originally Posted by Ryan Dodson View Post

        I've been told many times that people don't care about who you are. They just want to know what problem you're offering to solve and how long it will take.

        Maybe so, maybe not - again, that's what I've been told.
        Whoever told you that had their head firmly planted in their buttocks.

        Most people will not buy from you unless they know, like and trust you.

        VL
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  • Profile picture of the author Karson
    lol Joe might be a bad golfer but he had a good point for copywriting. Even if you list knows who you are... they might want to know where you were previously and why you have the solution.
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  • Profile picture of the author travlinguy
    Overall, I think it's decent. Not sure what font you're using (comic sans, maybe) for your headline but I'd go with something bolder, more authorative. The following comes across as a bit hokey and actually not very believable. Not worthy? Ugh.

    "Most people aren't even worthy of learning such powerful traffic generation methods, and therefore, I'm only sharing them with a handful of lucky individuals. But if you have what it takes - I'll show you how to attract HORDES of readers to every single article you'll ever publish..."

    That big blue rectangular image isn't doing you any good at all. I'd dump it as it's taking up valuable space. The first line after Dear Friend is a grabber. The phrase "laser targeted traffic" makes me cringe but maybe that's just because I've read it several million times and don't believe it. Though I am familiar with article syndication and the traffic derived from proper syndication is actually laser targeted. Go figure, huh?

    Overall, a good effort, though there are quite a few worn cliches (underground, barely used, flock of readers, etc.) in there. Maybe that's just my conditioning and laymen won't puke. Joe makes a good point. Tell us why you're the authority. I also think you need to make more of a case for dumping SEO because people are literally brainwashed into thinking it's the holy grail. One question question would be, why only $17? If you really have the goods this should be at least $37.
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  • Profile picture of the author Mark Pescetti
    The copy isn't bad.

    What I'd like to see way more of is talking about how traffic driving is the heart of any successful online business.

    Without ample targeted traffic, nobody knows you exist.

    Without ample targeted traffic, you'll never make a dime.

    Use some numbers:

    How much money do entrepreneurs spend on P.P.C. ads and other costly traffic driving techniques?

    How much money are you potentially SAVING prospects IF they buy your solution?

    I'd also explain more about why keyword density (and other caveman SEO techniques) are a thing of the past. How have the searched engines, specifically Google, evolved... and why does your solution get them ranked (when the old ways fail?)

    Obviously I'm not asking you to give away your proprietary approach, but further demonstrating your authority will generate more curiosity and impact.

    I'd would recommend making sure your "SEO is a waste of time" more towards the top too.

    Lastly...

    Make a VSL. This is the perfect market to present a nicely produced video sales letter that sets the tone for your copy. (In other words, write an original script. Don't just make a video out of the preexisting copy.)

    Mark Pescetti

    P.S. Definitely explain who you are, and more specifically, why you're the authority I should be listening to.
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  • Profile picture of the author Ryan Dodson
    Made some changes. Not totally done. But I think I'm making progress.
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