What Do You Think Of This Email Subject Line?

by Ken Strong

Posted: 15 years ago 24 replies

COPY WRITING

From an email I received today:

Subject: I stopped puking on my friends because of This FREE Mike Dillard event!

I imagine this person's friends will be happy to get this email, but other than that... ?

#email #line #puking on friends #questionable taste #shooting self in foot #subject

Collette 15 years ago

That one would be an instant 'delete' for me. I'd have absolutely no desire to read the contents of that email.

Maybe if I were a drunken frat boy I'd feel differently...
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- reynald2790 15 years ago
  
  I can read that subject line but if the content of that is not very important then I guess I quickly delete it. If an e-mail is a spam or not I will see and read what is the content about. What does it offers to me or what can it do for me. Simply, saying subject line for me does not matter as long as the content of an e-mail is very relevant on what I like.
  
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David Raybould 15 years ago

Hey Ken,

Yeah this would get a fast delete from me too.

It's almost like the guy's taken a cue from the
recent spate of awful "rubberneck" subject lines
some of the spammers have been using:
"Paris Hilton Dead In Plane Crash" and stuff like
that. It's like he's watered the shock factor
down to make it acceptable for legit email
marketing...

I don't think it's the way to go to build a
business and make some cash, in my eyes
whoever sent it just a lot of credibility
with me...

David Raybould
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Raydal 15 years ago

The mental picture this evokes is not a pretty one and
even though this could be used within a sales letter
(if you want to get your readers thinking that way) in
an email subject line will be risky.

Plus the imagery doesn't match either: "puking" with "free"?
EXCEPT you are really close and familiar with your list
this would be a 'no-no' for me.

-Ray Edwards
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- Ken Strong 15 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Raydal
  
  Plus the imagery doesn't match either: "puking" with "free"?
  EXCEPT you are really close and familiar with your list
  this would be a 'no-no' for me.
  
  Well -- puking is free, right?
  
  This email was from a safelist I use as a list-building tool, so the sender definitely wasn't communicating with a group he has any relationship with.
  
  The first paragraph went on talk about he was no longer vomiting verbally to his list because etc etc...
  
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BrianMcLeod 15 years ago

I had no idea Mike Dillard was into the "digestive health" niche.

Live and learn...
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- Kevin AKA Hubcap 15 years ago
  
  That would be one that I wouldn't read.
  
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  ndcole78 15 years ago
  
  I don't really like it Ken. I know that the objective is to get people to open the email, but it didn't make me want to open it.
  
  Now, the other day, I sent out an email with the subject line that said: "DAMMIT"
  
  That's all the subject line said.
  
  Now, that's using profanity, but my clients know me, so I can say that. Plus it intrigues them to wanna know why I used that word.
  
  When they opened the email, it said: "DAMMIT I miss working on your copy----here's a special deal for you today.
  
  I won't write the entire email, but you get the point.
  
  Even if I've never written anything for these people, most people would open it, which is the objective. The open rate was very high for this one.
  
  I know you're gifted Ken, so I know you'll come up with something cleaver.
  
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InternetMarketingCenter 15 years ago

It would appeal to a pretty specific audience that might laugh at it -- or end up with some angry opens wondering what the heck it was all about.

But neither group sounds particularly prone to buy.
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carolwingert 15 years ago

Mark it SPAM so anything else from him that comes in I will NOT get. and then DELETE it forever.

What kind of impression was he trying to make anyway????
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Rob Whisonant 15 years ago

I open intriguing, funny and informational email headlines.

That one fits none of the above.

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kdavies 15 years ago

It's a turn off. I wouldn't read it.
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KatHudson 15 years ago

it would be an instant delete for me
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- Loren Woirhaye 15 years ago
  
  the mind-movie image it creates of the sender is not
  attractive at all. I think the sender just shot himself
  in the foot by labeling himself as a "puker".
  
  Gross.
  
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scfc22 15 years ago

It is such an uninviting subject line that is an example of how not to do things. Rather than making you want to read the content, you simply want to prevent the individual from sending further garbage!
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authork 15 years ago

Have to admit this would be an instant delete from me as well. A great headline (or subject line) should grab the reader and make them WANT TO READ MORE! This subject line (as another pointed out) not only does not make me want to read more, but is incongruent. Who pukes on their friends (besides the aforementioned drunk frat guy)? What were some of the other subject lines you came up with and dismissed in favor of THIS subject line??
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peter gibson 15 years ago

Originally Posted by KenStrong

From an email I received today:

I imagine this person's friends will be happy to get this email, but other than that... ?

What's the word I'm looking for? hmmm... oh; ridiculous. That gets the instant delete from me with the lingering sensation to take a hot shower. It's childish, asinine, and intrusive, not to mention ridiculous. (Oh, I did mention ridiculous).
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Eric Dick 15 years ago

If you are in Multi Level, puking on your friends has connotations of just spewing information about why your part time business opportunity is so great. It's not bad, and I think the MLM crowd that is frustrated traditional MLM sales techniques will resonate with it, however free is a tricky word.

I usually never use it.
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Phalanx 15 years ago

I guess I'm the exception here then, but that headline made me burst out laughing

It's probably because I don't know who Mike Dillard is (I'm new in internet marketing).

So the first image that went through my mind was some Mike Dillard guy teaching a three-day workshop on how to not puke on your friends

Just imagine the exercises they would do...

"Okay guys, now let's split into groups of four. Pretend you're having a conversation. I'm going to hand you this special liquid, it will make you puke in about twenty seconds. [drinks] Once you feel the urge coming, I want you to turn your head over your shoulder, away from your friends, like this, and..." [proceeds to demonstrate]

Ohhh, yea!

But would I buy from an e-mail like that? Nope. I can't take the sender seriously with a headline like that.
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jasonsystema 15 years ago

I have to say I wouldn't read that email. The mental image isn't attractive, not to mention it doesn't motivate me to see what's in the email.
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multimastery 15 years ago

Sounds corny to me and more than likely would be an instant delete!
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Tom Sheltraw 15 years ago

It would be an instant delete for me too. Personally, I never open an email that has not appealed to a need or desire that I already have unless it looks sooo good that I want to research the email style.

BTW, when I do open an email that is not a need or desire I always save it to a folder for future reference. I figure if I opened it it must have some magnetic appeal to it and I need to study it to find the reasons I wanted to open it.

Just my thoughts,

Tom
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