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Any WeightLoss and fitness niche writers

by 7dayfitness
15 replies
Good Morning,

Well I have finally completed my own product and it is working very well online.

One Problem! I am not closing the sale which means no one is purchasing my product. So now I learning how to copywriter, drive traffic and learning how to create sales funnel.

So I have created a Ebook in attempt to explain my program and methods and hoping from this ebook I can sell a person on my amazing fitness program.

I believe a weight loss/fitness copywriter is what I need initially to help with a sales funnel

Here is the ebook and I would appreciate your thoughts CopyWriters.
http://getfitwithpassion.com/hellona...ness-Ebook.pdf

Thanks Guys
#fitness #niche #weightloss #writers
  • Profile picture of the author angiecolee
    Are you actually asking a specialist copywriter to help you create a sales funnel free of charge? That's a way different thing to ask for than a critique.
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    Aspiring copywriters: if you need 1:1 advice from an experienced copy chief, head over to my Phone a Friend page.

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  • Profile picture of the author Dan Curtis
    I'm afraid I don't quite understand what you are asking.

    Originally Posted by 7dayfitness View Post

    Well I have finally completed my own product and it is working very well online.

    One Problem! I am not closing the sale which means no one is purchasing my product.
    What is your product?

    What do you mean when you say it is "working very well online"?

    What exactly are you trying to sell, and what is your selling price?

    I looked at your ebook. You have testimonials in there. If no one is purchasing your product, who are the testimonials from?
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    • Profile picture of the author Mark Andrews
      Banned
      How many times do we have to put up with you spamming this forum with constant links to your product?

      What is this, the 5th time now in as many weeks?


      Mark Andrews
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      • Profile picture of the author 7dayfitness
        [DELETED]
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        • Profile picture of the author Mark Andrews
          Banned
          It's a PDF eBook not a piece of sales copy.

          We don't provide free critiques for eBooks here in the Copywriting Forum.


          Mark Andrews
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  • Profile picture of the author 7dayfitness
    I apologize Mark Andrews that is not my intention to spam.. I am just new to the IM world. I am just look for a critique.

    Please accept my Apologies.

    Wes
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  • Profile picture of the author Corey Geer
    Did you make that header banner in Geocities?

    Well, I actually did read through a couple of pages. Did you write this yourself? It's pretty hard to read and it's not something you want to continue reading.
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    Skype: Coreygeer319

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    • Profile picture of the author Onyemere
      Hey I am a professional weight loss and fitness writer. I am working in this industry for 5 years. If you want to know more about me you could post a question.
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  • Profile picture of the author hhhusted
    Originally Posted by 7dayfitness View Post

    Good Morning,

    Well I have finally completed my own product and it is working very well online.

    One Problem! I am not closing the sale which means no one is purchasing my product. So now I learning how to copywriter, drive traffic and learning how to create sales funnel.

    So I have created a Ebook in attempt to explain my program and methods and hoping from this ebook I can sell a person on my amazing fitness program.

    I believe a weight loss/fitness copywriter is what I need initially to help with a sales funnel

    Here is the ebook and I would appreciate your thoughts CopyWriters.
    http://getfitwithpassion.com/hellona...ness-Ebook.pdf

    Thanks Guys
    I'm not sure what you are asking either. Your use of English makes it hard to comprehend what you are saying.

    By the way, I do write for the fitness and weight loss industry.
    Signature

    -----------------------------------------------------------
    Harry Husted
    http://www.creatingwords.com
    With 20+ years’ experience, I can help YOU stop struggling to stand out, with a more dynamic marketing message, SEO, an attention-getting e-book, or a catchy jingle of your own to reel in those prospects.

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  • Profile picture of the author laurencewins
    I find the photo very off putting to begin with and then the numerous errors throughout. Your book is very vague which is why you're not getting sales.
    Signature

    Cheers, Laurence.
    Writer/Editor/Proofreader.

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    • Profile picture of the author hhhusted
      Originally Posted by laurencewins View Post

      I find the photo very off putting to begin with and then the numerous errors throughout. Your book is very vague which is why you're not getting sales.
      I concur. I actually took a minute or two to skim through the e-book. I noticed a number of errors. The formatting is wrong, etc.

      The best way to get this book shaped up to sell, is to have a professional ghostwriter, like myself, or someone on this board, to re-write it. Then generate a great sales copy based on the content from the e-book.

      Once that is done, the product will do better than it is now.
      Signature

      -----------------------------------------------------------
      Harry Husted
      http://www.creatingwords.com
      With 20+ years’ experience, I can help YOU stop struggling to stand out, with a more dynamic marketing message, SEO, an attention-getting e-book, or a catchy jingle of your own to reel in those prospects.

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  • Profile picture of the author Sue McDonald
    I had a look at the ebook and I found the whole set up very ugly. I got as far as the testimonials and found far too many that it started to look spammy.
    In my opinion this book needs a rewrite and yes I do work out but I don't think this book would motivate me to purchase your product.
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    Let's Learn Wordpress
    How to Build Effective Sales Funnels
    My Blog - Follow my journey online.
    My interest - Alternative Therapies.
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    • Profile picture of the author hhhusted
      Originally Posted by Sue McDonald View Post

      I had a look at the ebook and I found the whole set up very ugly. I got as far as the testimonials and found far too many that it started to look spammy.
      In my opinion this book needs a rewrite and yes I do work out but I don't think this book would motivate me to purchase your product.
      Hi Sue,

      Nice to meet someone from "Aussieland." How's it there? I have a friend that lives in your area. I do work for him once in a while.

      Anyway, I looked at the e-book again, and am wondering exactly what this guy is selling? The e-book is vague. Needs work.

      Harry
      Signature

      -----------------------------------------------------------
      Harry Husted
      http://www.creatingwords.com
      With 20+ years’ experience, I can help YOU stop struggling to stand out, with a more dynamic marketing message, SEO, an attention-getting e-book, or a catchy jingle of your own to reel in those prospects.

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  • Profile picture of the author laurencewins
    Exactly my point. I am also a ghost writer/proofreader and that is why I pointed out those aspects. Your book doesn't give anybody confidence in you at all, sad to say.
    Signature

    Cheers, Laurence.
    Writer/Editor/Proofreader.

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    • Profile picture of the author hhhusted
      Originally Posted by laurencewins View Post

      Exactly my point. I am also a ghost writer/proofreader and that is why I pointed out those aspects. Your book doesn't give anybody confidence in you at all, sad to say.
      That's why I recommended a re-write. Maybe he'll go that route to help himself.
      Signature

      -----------------------------------------------------------
      Harry Husted
      http://www.creatingwords.com
      With 20+ years’ experience, I can help YOU stop struggling to stand out, with a more dynamic marketing message, SEO, an attention-getting e-book, or a catchy jingle of your own to reel in those prospects.

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  • Profile picture of the author 7dayfitness
    THANKS guys. I apologize for my english which was apparently not clear at all. I am learning so much from this forum and you are correct I am looking to hire a writer to rewrite the book as a sales page. I really appreciate the honesty and the critics I need that.

    I will like to see a few of your pages so I can make a clear decision, if that is ok.

    Talk Soon
    Wes
    GET FIT WITH PASSION
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