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Home Page Copy: Please Help

by Liarspoker
3 replies
I recently changed the copy on my home page to play on peoples emotions (I'm sure you copy guys have a different way of phrasing this).

Several phrases are based on keyword research so I am also hoping for higher conversions (aren't we all!) as well as more traffic.

You can see how each line starts and the parts that are underlined.

Previously I described the product instead of stating what is in it for the client.

However the copy still seems weak.

Any suggestions for improvements are definitely welcomed.

Market Swings - Stock Market Training & Education by Marcel Springorum - Ireland

I'm in the process of creating more products to sell which wil be marketed to my list with the 'benefits' of the product described.
#copy #home #page
  • Profile picture of the author shawnlebrun
    Marcel,

    You win if you're trying to create a page based on unspecific ambiguities.

    Not sure that even made sense, but what I'm trying to say is... you gotta get more specific.

    Stock market training for you is about as broad and generic as you can be.

    People want specifics... they want numbers... they want to be able to paint certain vivid pictures in their minds... and they can't if you're too broad.

    "how to lose 10 pounds of blubber in 15 days by eating this one food" will usually get more optins than "how to lose weight"

    "Learn how to play the opening riff of Van Halen's "Eruption" in just 5 minutes" will probably get better results than "how to play the guitar"

    "how to grip a bat just the right way so you hit 410 foot home runs" will probably work better than "how to hit a baseball"

    "How to turn $10 into $10,000 with just 2 stock trading tips" will probably work better than "stock training"

    Being more specific helps people to picture doing those things... it seems more real and believable.

    So, I'd try to think of the biggest problem or issue you can help solve... or think of a very specific tip or technique you can give... and use that instead.

    Give away a solution or tip that focuses on doing ONE thing... something important... and offer that up.

    Think specifics... think actual numbers, timeframes, etc... not generalities.

    That "free ebook" form on the side, again, it's so generic... you'd be lucky to get anyone to sign up.

    You know how National Enquirer has some outlandish headlines... and some of the world's top selling magazines all live and die by their cover headlines?

    Well, think of that when doing your squeeze page or optin page.

    Think of it as a magazine cover... and what you write has to sell that magazine.

    Do you think they'd sell a lot of magazines with "free stock training for you"

    Nope, they'd sell more with "12 Year old Stock Market Whiz Reveals How He Turned $10 into $10,000 in just 3 Weeks"

    Treat your squeeze page like a magazine cover... you gotta make the sale based on the cover alone.
    Signature
    MILLION Dollar Copywriter Offering Written Sales Letter or VSL Script Worth $5,000 - Just $500!
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    • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
      Marcel,

      Which sub group of investors are you wanting to reach?

      Knowing this gives us an insight to the motivations
      which drive the group.

      Each group has different drivers.

      For example...

      * Biz-op like mentality of the penny stock
      chaser

      * "Safety first" mindset of the Treasuries
      investor

      * Colossal greed of the trader wishing to
      turn $25 thousand into $25 million

      * Gold bug-survivalist preparing for the
      "post-apocalypse"

      * Retiree with money who can't resist the
      allure of something that's free

      * Dividend investor dreaming of a bigger
      mailbox to hold her growing number of
      distribution checks

      * Options trader scouting for the latest
      advisory to guide him to successful
      trades

      * Investment newsletter subscriber waiting
      for the discovery of "the next Google"

      And these are just a fraction of the
      types of respondents in the financial
      markets. You've also got traders and
      investors who are faithful to any one of
      hundreds of different sectors... or
      countries for that matter.

      The important thing to remember -- that
      most novice marketers get wrong is...

      What drives financial markets
      respondents isn't money itself...
      but devotion to their particular money
      "channel".

      We can't match the right message until we get this part right first.

      Best,
      Ewen
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      • Profile picture of the author Liarspoker
        Thanks guys. Those are great replies.

        I'll edit tomorrow and run it past ye again.
        Signature

        Lovin' Life!

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