How to write 'sales pitches' without overselling it?

Facts!

There's nothing worse than lying in a sales pitch just to make the sale. Not only will this lead to a poor reputation for yourself but can also lead to an influx in refunds as people don't get what they paid for.

Stats and Numbers!

Part of facts, yes, but numbers make things easy to understand for people who just scan over your sales copy.

Headline!

Focus on it. You'll have a matter of seconds to attract your visitors attention so make the headline catchy. Don't be too clever here. This is one mistake people make. They go all out trying to be quirky and to them it seems like a great headline but to people who know nothing about the product, it's rubbish. Make the headline clear and intriguing.

Questions are a great thing to throw into your headline "Are you Struggling with XYZ?" "Do you need Help with your XYZ?" These sort of things will get people intrigued.

Another type is the 'How One Man Cured his XYZ in 5 Minutes!" OK, not the best headline but it's a template for how to start your headline. Then you can begin to bulk it out with adjectives that sell it.

Don't scrimp on your headline. Spend hours and possibly DAYS getting it right. A headline is what will get people reading the rest of your copy.

Good luck!

I must have wrote a few hundred sales pitches now and had a few very high converting ones. I have tried everything from high pressure high hype when I started to later learning from mentors and what tends to convert at least for me better is if in the pitch I can also educate the prospect so they become more aware and understanding, then the call to action tends to become natural and not high pressure sales but an normal extension. That being said it's not easy to do.

Length is one of those funny things. The right length is "however long it takes you to pitch the product, and no longer."

Some audiences will read, some won't. If they won't, try more of an infographic style.

Deliver enough information about the product that the prospect feels comfortable buying. Illustrate all the benefits they'll enjoy with the product. Tell them about your guarantee. Inspire them to action.

Think about it this way. Who goes to Amazon or Walmart.com and buys just based on the photo and manufacturer's description... versus paging through the reviews, searching the internet for "kitty kuddler reviews" and "does kitty kuddler suck," etc.

One reason sales letters are so good at increasing conversions is they take care of the "looking for information" step in the buyers' buying process.

What's the hook in the main sales letter or VSL?

Now...

How can you build interest in that hook, without divulging it, so prospects are "primed" or pre-qualified when they click thru?

It's not just about getting clicks onto the offer; it's about getting REAL buyers to take action.

Get clear on who the avatar is.

Talk with her.

Give her something to earn credibility; to build curiosity.

What are your ideas?

Mark

Having the pitch too lengthy definitely is an automatic turn off to readers, but too short most likely didn't give them enough information or hook them enough to want to learn more about the product. The sales pitch should tell them enough information to understand what you are selling but not giving too much information so you entice them to want to learn more and really get to know the product. When explaining the weight loss product, don't get too technical with words, but put in necessary and helpful facts. The trick is to find what is the important information vs. what is just flashy wording that doesn't necessarily need to be in the sales pitch, but can be included in the information that they will (hopefully) read when finding out more about the product.

It may take a few tries to see which angle truly works for your audience. The nice part is, you can put out a few different sales pitches generating an audience of different backgrounds.

I agree what others are saying here, keep your sales page as short as possible. And split test.

Think about what the reader will need to achieve his ideal outcome.

You can teach him one step to get closer.

Second step is the upsell to the main affiliate offer.

Take a dating example.

A single guy thinks about "will she like me and how can I tell,
without being rejected or made to look like a fool".

Sound reasonable so far?

OK, you've entered into the conversation he has going on in his mind.

So you promise to teach him how to tell if she likes him,
without making a fool of himself,
and do it easier than he thought he could.

On the thank you page you upsell him...

"Oh now you'll have mastered knowing if she likes you or not fast and painless,
you'll probably be thinking on how you can get a date now you have that skill mastered."

Naturally, that's the next step he will be thinking,
so you give him what he wants.

And then you lead him to "Double Your Dating"
in which you are an affiliate.

In summary, give an easy first step to achieve the outcome he is after.

Next step...the upsell becomes the affiliate offer which takes him
closer to getting the desired end result.

Ideally you should charge for the first step, because
$30,000,000 of test results have shown
your core product offer is bought in much higher numbers
when it's presented as an upsell at the time of purchase.

Best,
Ewen