Write Like You Talk (Email Writing 101 In 8 Steps)

25 replies
I'm on a lot of people's lists - like I'm sure everyone here is.

Right now, my two favorite entrepreneurs I get emails from are Sonia Ricotti and Trace Haskins (The Doodle Video Dude.)

Now, I'm always skeptical whether the business owner actually writes their own stuff, but I'm pretty damn confident these two do. Their energy; their essence really comes through.

Sonia always starts off with some sort of positive note, followed by a little insight into her personal life - like where she is, what's on her mind or what she's doing. It's those little personal touches that make an email feel like it's just a friendly note from someone you love and trust.

Trace always has this upbeat, contagious excitement in his emails. You can tell the guy is really living and breathing his business... and loves it.

On the flip side...

I noticed Rich Schefren has been blasting his list a lot. My opinion? His emails are generic, canned-feeling marketing cliches - obviously written by a hired-hand. I click on the links with a sense of spite - just because I want to see the offer.

Why spite?

Well, the emails that his team blasts just don't have an iota of personal touch... or any feeling "he's talking with me." They're just a bunch of copywriting techniques thrown together to create a contrived sense of continuity and value. I hate it.

That being said...

Here are a few tips for writing your own emails to make sure prospects can FEEL the basic person-to-person conversational quality you want...

Talk about something you're thinking... or something that just happened to you.

"Hey Y'all... I hope you're refreshed this morning.

I had a really bad night's sleep. Weird dreams, hurricane force winds, a creaking house, a noise-filled mind... sleep just wasn't on the menu."

2) Whether you're pitching your own offer... or someone else's... make sure you're sharing your genuine excitement.

"But boy oh boy did I wake right up - when I saw a friend of mine - Trace Haskins is offering a huge 30% off his Doodle Video Program."

3) Demonstrate authority on the offer.

"His program makes it easy to create your own Doodle Videos, which as you know are converting like crazy these days. And not only that, but you can even make totally original videos for other product developers.

I've personally paid over $10,000 for a single video. The guy got the whole thing completed in less than a week. So you do the math on how much you could potentially earn."

4) Get prospects attached to the idea of what could happen - if they take action.

"I know a lot of you have been struggling to truly manifest a spectacular online living. But believe me, it does NOT have to be that way. Trace's program puts you in front of a hungry crowd - with BIG budgets - who NEED amazing people like you to help them maximize their own profits. Talk about win/win.

5) Bring up and overcome an objection or two.

"What makes Trace's course so awesome is... ANYONE can do it. It doesn't matter if you currently suck at drawing a stick man. He'll show you some incredibly easy tricks to whip out perfect storyboards... making the copy REALLY come alive.

Speaking of writing, he'll even show you how to craft your own emotionally-seductive copy.

That's worth the price of admission alone.

Heck...

You might not even want to create videos for other people. You'll be too busy busting out videos for your own products and offers. But the point is, you'll have the skills and options to do BOTH - if you so choose... from anywhere in the world. Brilliant, right?"

6) Infuse your personality into the CTA (and add some genuine scarcity - if it's available.)

"Check out what Trace has to say. I'm extremely confident you'll love what he has to say. The guy is the real deal. Just don't sit on the fence too long when it comes to decision time. His 30% off opportunity is only available to the first 10 people who take action."

7) Create an uplifting sign-off.

"To Your Inevitable Success

Mark"

8) Make sure what's on the table is crystal clear in your post script.

"P.S. Doodle videos can increase conversions in virtually every niche - as much as 800% higher than just copy. So whether you're helping other entrepreneurs communicate the value of their products and services... or your offering your own stuff... being able to easily produce video after video is a no-brainer. It's profit-generating-security at its best. Click here to hear what Trace has to say..."

Keep in mind...

The above isn't meant to be a formula. I just think it's important to have a few insights into putting your own "vibe" into the copy (whether you're blasting your list or buying a solo.)

Have a great hump day.

Mark

P.S. Don't forget your subject line. In this case, maybe something like, "The Ultimate Work-At-Home Miracle?"
#101 #email #steps #talk #write #writing
  • Profile picture of the author The Copy Nazi
    Banned
    Originally Posted by Mark Pescetti View Post

    I'm on a lot of people's lists - like I'm sure everyone here is.

    Right now, my two favorite entrepreneurs I get emails from are Sonia Ricotti and Trace Haskins (The Doodle Video Dude.)

    Now, I'm always skeptical whether the business owner actually writes their own stuff, but I'm pretty damn confident these two do. Their energy; their essence really comes through.

    Sonia always starts off with some sort of positive note, followed by a little insight into her personal life - like where she is, what's on her mind or what she's doing. It's those little personal touches that make an email feel like it's just a friendly note from someone you love and trust.

    Trace always has this upbeat, contagious excitement in his emails. You can tell the guy is really living and breathing his business... and loves it.

    On the flip side...

    I noticed Rich Schefren has been blasting his list a lot. My opinion? His emails are generic, canned-feeling marketing cliches - obviously written by a hired-hand. I click on the links with a sense of spite - just because I want to see the offer.

    Why spite?

    Well, the emails that his team blasts just don't have an iota of personal touch... or any feeling "he's talking with me." They're just a bunch of copywriting techniques thrown together to create a contrived sense of continuity and value. I hate it.

    That being said...

    Here are a few tips for writing your own emails to make sure prospects can FEEL the basic person-to-person conversational quality you want...

    Talk about something you're thinking... or something that just happened to you.

    "Hey Y'all... I hope you're refreshed this morning.

    I had a really bad night's sleep. Weird dreams, hurricane force winds, a creaking house, a noise-filled mind... sleep just wasn't on the menu."

    2) Whether you're pitching your own offer... or someone else's... make sure you're sharing your genuine excitement.

    "But boy oh boy did I wake right up - when I saw a friend of mine - Trace Haskins is offering a huge 30% off his Doodle Video Program."

    3) Demonstrate authority on the offer.

    "His program makes it easy to create your own Doodle Videos, which as you know are converting like crazy these days. And not only that, but you can even make totally original videos for other product developers.

    I've personally paid over $10,000 for a single video. The guy got the whole thing completed in less than a week. So you do the math on how much you could potentially earn."

    4) Get prospects attached to the idea of what could happen - if they take action.

    "I know a lot of you have been struggling to truly manifest a spectacular online living. But believe me, it does NOT have to be that way. Trace's program puts you in front of a hungry crowd - with BIG budgets - who NEED amazing people like you to help them maximize their own profits. Talk about win/win.

    5) Bring up and overcome an objection or two.

    "What makes Trace's course so awesome is... ANYONE can do it. It doesn't matter if you currently suck at drawing a stick man. He'll show you some incredibly easy tricks to whip out perfect storyboards... making the copy REALLY come alive.

    Speaking of writing, he'll even show you how to craft your own emotionally-seductive copy.

    That's worth the price of admission alone.

    Heck...

    You might not even want to create videos for other people. You'll be too busy busting out videos for your own products and offers. But the point is, you'll have the skills and options to do BOTH - if you so choose... from anywhere in the world. Brilliant, right?"

    6) Infuse your personality into the CTA (and add some genuine scarcity - if it's available.)

    "Check out what Trace has to say. I'm extremely confident you'll love what he has to say. The guy is the real deal. Just don't sit on the fence too long when it comes to decision time. His 30% off opportunity is only available to the first 10 people who take action."

    7) Create an uplifting sign-off.

    "To Your Inevitable Success

    Mark"

    8) Make sure what's on the table is crystal clear in your post script.

    "P.S. Doodle videos can increase conversions in virtually every niche - as much as 800% higher than just copy. So whether you're helping other entrepreneurs communicate the value of their products and services... or your offering your own stuff... being able to easily produce video after video is a no-brainer. It's profit-generating-security at its best. Click here to hear what Trace has to say..."

    Keep in mind...

    The above isn't meant to be a formula. I just think it's important to have a few insights into putting your own "vibe" into the copy (whether you're blasting your list or buying a solo.)

    Have a great hump day.

    Mark

    P.S. Don't forget your subject line. In this case, maybe something like, "The Ultimate Work-At-Home Miracle?"
    You'll hate me but I don't agree with some of this. For starters - keep it one-on-one. As soon as I read "I know a lot of you"... I lose interest. You mean you're talking to a whole bunch of people and not just me? You lose me right there.

    This stuff leaves me cold -
    Hey Y'all... I hope you're refreshed this morning.

    I had a really bad night's sleep. Weird dreams, hurricane force winds, a creaking house, a noise-filled mind... sleep just wasn't on the menu."
    I could give a sh!t.

    I've personally paid over $10,000 for a single video.
    Again, I could care less. I'm tuned to WIIFM (What's in it for me?)

    "Win/win"??? Puke.

    "Take action" - double puke.

    "To your inevitable success"...now I'm dry retching. Hate that stuff. Hate it. "Uplifting" - my ass.

    "The Ultimate work at home miracle". Dude...seriously. That sucks.
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    • Profile picture of the author Alex Cohen
      Originally Posted by The Copy Nazi View Post


      "Win/win"??? Puke.

      "Take action" - double puke.

      "To your inevitable success"...now I'm dry retching. Hate that stuff. Hate it. "Uplifting" - my ass.

      "The Ultimate work at home miracle". Dude...seriously. That sucks.
      And my personal favorite,

      "Take your business to the next level"

      Not in the quoted email, but since you're having a heavefest...

      Alex
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      • Profile picture of the author The Copy Nazi
        Banned
        Originally Posted by Alex Cohen View Post

        And my personal favorite,

        "Take your business to the next level"

        Not in the quoted email, but since you're having a heavefest...

        Alex
        Think "Verticals" man.
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    • Profile picture of the author Mark Pescetti
      Originally Posted by The Copy Nazi View Post

      You'll hate me but I don't agree with some of this. For starters - keep it one-on-one. As soon as I read "I know a lot of you"... I lose interest. You mean you're talking to a whole bunch of people and not just me? You lose me right there.

      This stuff leaves me cold -
      I could give a sh!t.

      Again, I could care less. I'm tuned to WIIFM (What's in it for me?)
      Good call. Agreed.

      Originally Posted by The Copy Nazi View Post

      "Win/win"??? Puke.

      "Take action" - double puke.

      "To your inevitable success"...now I'm dry retching. Hate that stuff. Hate it. "Uplifting" - my ass.

      "The Ultimate work at home miracle". Dude...seriously. That sucks.
      I've actually used that subject line before on something... and it worked... so...

      Mark
      Signature

      Do you want a 9 figure copywriter and biz owner to Write With You? I'll work with you, on zoom, to help write your copy or client copy... while you learn from one of the few copywriters to legit hit 9 figures in gross sales! Discover More

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    • I believe people do like to know a little bit about what is happening in your life when you email them.

      It creates a personal touch and people are essentially voyeurs.

      otherwise Jersey Shore would be flop.
      Signature
      "Peter Brennan is the real deal, In the first 12 hours we did $80k...and over $125k in the first week...if you want to be successful online, outsource your copywriting to Peter"
      Adam Linkenauger

      For 12 ways to sell more stuff to more people today...go to...www.peterbrennan.net
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    • Profile picture of the author RickDuris
      Originally Posted by The Copy Nazi View Post

      You'll hate me but I don't agree with some of this. For starters - keep it one-on-one. As soon as I read "I know a lot of you"... I lose interest. You mean you're talking to a whole bunch of people and not just me? You lose me right there.

      This stuff leaves me cold -
      I could give a sh!t.

      Again, I could care less. I'm tuned to WIIFM (What's in it for me?)

      "Win/win"??? Puke.

      "Take action" - double puke.

      "To your inevitable success"...now I'm dry retching. Hate that stuff. Hate it. "Uplifting" - my ass.

      "The Ultimate work at home miracle". Dude...seriously. That sucks.
      I wrote an email last year in the personal development market that did well...

      "Take action, my ass"
      Signature
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    • Profile picture of the author splitTest
      Originally Posted by The Copy Nazi View Post

      You'll hate me but I don't agree with some of this. For starters - keep it one-on-one. As soon as I read "I know a lot of you"... I lose interest. You mean you're talking to a whole bunch of people and not just me? You lose me right there.

      This stuff leaves me cold -
      I could give a sh!t.

      Again, I could care less. I'm tuned to WIIFM (What's in it for me?)

      "Win/win"??? Puke.

      "Take action" - double puke.

      "To your inevitable success"...now I'm dry retching. Hate that stuff. Hate it. "Uplifting" - my ass.

      "The Ultimate work at home miracle". Dude...seriously. That sucks.
      CopyNazi, with all the hate and wretching, you obviously have strong opinions on Mark's draft... I'm curious how you might recast some of those lines.

      Mark, imho, those are good points and durn good copy.
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      • Profile picture of the author The Copy Nazi
        Banned
        Originally Posted by splitTest View Post

        CopyNazi, with all the hate and wretching, you obviously have strong opinions on Mark's draft... I'm curious how you might recast some of those lines.

        Mark, imho, those are good points and durn good copy.
        If you think this "durn good copy" there's absolutely no point in my trying to convince you otherwise. And it's "retching".
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        • Profile picture of the author splitTest
          Originally Posted by The Copy Nazi View Post

          If you think this "durn good copy" there's absolutely no point in my trying to convince you otherwise. And it's "retching".
          That's a cop out. I don't doubt that you know what you're talking about (after all, you're a nazi ), but since you have such strong opinions about good copy (post after post), I'd like to see some of yours.

          Or at least post links to "Frankie-boy's latest emails 'send elephant tranquilizers (please)'" so we know what you're impressed by.

          No offense though -- the retching definitely adds value to the discussion.
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          • Profile picture of the author The Copy Nazi
            Banned
            Originally Posted by splitTest View Post

            That's a cop out. I don't doubt that you know what you're talking about (after all, you're a nazi ), but since you have such strong opinions about good copy (post after post), I'd like to see some of yours.

            Or at least post links to "Frankie-boy's latest emails 'send elephant tranquilizers (please)'" so we know what you're impressed by.

            No offense though -- the retching definitely adds value to the discussion.
            Hey Mister 25 posts/joined December...I don't need to prove anything to anybody. If you don't know of me or my work that's your bad. Same with Kern. Get on his list - it's easy enough.

            How old are you BTW? 19? 20? College boy perhaps? You really want to cross swords with me? Go for your life. I'll eat you alive. You're way out of your depth. But have a go - I'd enjoy it.
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            • Profile picture of the author splitTest
              Originally Posted by The Copy Nazi View Post

              Hey Mister 25 posts/joined December...I don't need to prove anything to anybody. If you don't know of me or my work that's your bad. Same with Kern. Get on his list - it's easy enough.

              How old are you BTW? 19? 20? College boy perhaps? You really want to cross swords with me? Go for your life. I'll eat you alive. You're way out of your depth. But have a go - I'd enjoy it.
              wtf?

              I'd rather just see some of your copy, mr. nazi. Never mind.

              But back on topic:

              Conversational writing is harder than it seems. For most people, simply writing "like you talk" wouldn't work out so well. Affecting a "one-on-one" conversational tone -- regardless of the product at hand -- is a real craft. Doesn't come easy.
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              • Profile picture of the author The Copy Nazi
                Banned
                Originally Posted by splitTest View Post

                wtf?

                I'd rather just see some of your copy, mr. nazi. Never mind.

                But back on topic:

                Conversational writing is harder than it seems. For most people, simply writing "like you talk" wouldn't work out so well. Affecting a "one-on-one" conversational tone -- regardless of the product at hand -- is a real craft. Doesn't come easy.
                Writing conversational-style - like you're blogging or on facebook or something is easier than writing hackneyed boring stuff like "Win/win", "Take action", "To your inevitable success". People don't talk like that. Robots might. Get yourself "Dragon Naturally Speaking" speech recognition software...record yourself...then clean it up.

                Here's an old post of mine that may help your writing - http://www.warriorforum.com/copywrit...-business.html.
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                • Profile picture of the author shawnlebrun
                  Originally Posted by The Copy Nazi View Post

                  Writing conversational-style - like you're blogging or on facebook or something is easier than writing hackneyed boring stuff like "Win/win", "Take action", "To your inevitable success". People don't talk like that. Robots might. Get yourself "Dragon Naturally Speaking" speech recognition software...record yourself...then clean it up.

                  Here's an old post of mine that may help your writing - http://www.warriorforum.com/copywrit...-business.html.
                  For what it's worth...

                  Some of the newer writers here could do themselves a favor and go back through some of Mal's (Copy Nazi) posts and study up on what it takes to get noticed these days.

                  F**king personality.

                  Whether you agree with him or not, there's one thing you can be sure of...

                  He's not boring. He has personality. He'll call you out when needed. He creates discussion. He'll debate.

                  Marketing 101. He stands out and gets noticed.

                  Without that, you're toast these days.

                  With everyone on information overload these days... you gotta
                  be different and stand out, for the most part.

                  Mal does that probably better than anyone here.

                  And in the case of email... it's all about personality. Sh*t, how many emails do you get each day?

                  Me, I get 1,000 or more.

                  But I read 2, maybe 4.

                  Matt Furey and Ben Settle... and Frank when he emails.

                  Why? Personality.

                  I can get information anywhere... it's a commodity.

                  But what I'm "buying" is them... the people.

                  Look at anything that's gone viral these days... it's about
                  something so interesting, so unusual and out of the ordinary...
                  it gets attention.

                  All else just blends in.

                  so yeah, sure... you can send the same old boring-ass emails...
                  and just continue to blend and fade into the background.

                  Me, I agree with Mal. Be outrageous... yet helpful.

                  Tell stories, but add value.

                  One of my most profitable emails I've ever created was
                  back a few years ago when I was running my fitness
                  company.

                  I was having SUCH a sh*tty day... I decided to write
                  my list.

                  And honestly, all the email was about was how crappy
                  I was feeling... how I was feeling down about such and
                  such... but yet I still decided to suck it up, take action,
                  go workout, blah blah blah.

                  It was all about me, my day, how depressed I had
                  been feeling, and then at the end, I turned it around
                  and gave some advice/action on what I did to improve
                  my situation.

                  It was the most personable email I had ever written.
                  And the most profitable.

                  so, the more I study email and learn from some of the
                  best emailers... the more I realize it's about being
                  unique and different... having personality that stands
                  out... being a storyteller... adding value and solving
                  problems.

                  And being real.

                  Anytime I go through the affiliate swipes on Clickbank,
                  to see what most marketers give their afffiliates to use
                  for emails... I want to vomit. Horrendous.

                  So yeah, great email writing is part art, part science,
                  and something you can develop over time by using feedback
                  from your list.

                  Keep a pulse on what creates some big time
                  chatter... and do more of that.

                  But yeah... Mr. Split Test... not picking on you, but DO
                  go to that post of Mal's that he listed.

                  I have over 850 of Matt Furey's emails. Been studying his
                  writing since 2003 or so.

                  I've studied both of his email writing courses. Studied most
                  of his sales letters.

                  Some have called Matt the greatest living email writer alive.

                  And the funny thing is, reading Mal's post above reminds
                  me of Matt's writing... because it draws you in with story.

                  Storytelling is a nice and easy way to sneak by the defenses
                  most people put up when it comes to resisting a sales pitch.

                  Reading Mal's story draws you in because, well, it's a story.

                  So yeah, for what it's worth... Mal's post reminded me a lot
                  of what I read when seeing Furey's stuff.

                  but even still... Mal is Mal and Matt is Matt... and that's my
                  point.... just find your own unique voice.
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                • Profile picture of the author Mark Pescetti
                  Originally Posted by The Copy Nazi View Post

                  Writing conversational-style - like you're blogging or on facebook or something is easier than writing hackneyed boring stuff like "Win/win", "Take action", "To your inevitable success". People don't talk like that. Robots might. Get yourself "Dragon Naturally Speaking" speech recognition software...record yourself...then clean it up.

                  Here's an old post of mine that may help your writing - http://www.warriorforum.com/copywrit...-business.html.
                  I use voice recognition software. And totally agree it's the right way to go.

                  I also agree that Mal is the epitome of being real... writing how he talks. Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, can say Mal isn't authentic. You always know where you stand with him... and he's constantly leaving behind golden nuggets to pick up in his wake.

                  But I wholeheartedly disagree with a few things being said here.

                  Remember Walter Cronkite? Do you remember his sign off? It's hard not to, right? He's say, "And that's the way it is" at the end of his pieces.

                  Andy Rooney had one too.

                  Is it natural to say in a conversation? No. And yeah, the title of this thread is "write like you talk."

                  Here's the thing...

                  We're in sales, but we're also in the business of being a personality; a brand.

                  Sonia Ricotti uses them. Rich Schefren uses them (something like To Higher Profits and Beyond)... and most other marketers do.

                  They're trying to get known for a specific phrase or a way of affirming the benefits they want prospects to achieve.

                  Also...

                  We're in the business of results.

                  That's why I always say, "Result don't lie!"

                  Is saying "take action" cheesy as hell? Sure it is. And as a copywriter, it's been used more than Dick Cheney used W. Not the point. The question is, can it work in the right context? And the answer is yes.

                  Here's something else...

                  Just because we don't all talk alike - it does NOT mean one person's style is better or worse. Just different. Again, copy is either effective... or it isn't. And sounding as natural as possible is A goal, but not THE goal.

                  THE goal is connecting and converting.

                  Everyone here strives to make their copy sound like talking, not writing.

                  And most people fail - with glimpses of utter brilliance.

                  [sign off]

                  Mark
                  Signature

                  Do you want a 9 figure copywriter and biz owner to Write With You? I'll work with you, on zoom, to help write your copy or client copy... while you learn from one of the few copywriters to legit hit 9 figures in gross sales! Discover More

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                • Profile picture of the author splitTest
                  Originally Posted by The Copy Nazi View Post

                  Here's an old post of mine that may help your writing - http://www.warriorforum.com/copywrit...-business.html.
                  Yep. That's good stuff.

                  I like your points there and especially how you recast your mentee's copy to illustrate them.

                  Gives me interesting insights and approaches to emulate, which is exactly why I come here.

                  I really have to police my stuff to keep it "conversational," coming from a long background selling products targeting professionals and academics. Not to mention the "storytelling" aspect, which in most schools of thought is far less valuable in "b-to-b" than "b-to-c"...

                  (...outside of white papers, of course.)

                  Now getting into "b-to-c" I'm massaging my skills...
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                  • Profile picture of the author The Copy Nazi
                    Banned
                    Originally Posted by splitTest View Post

                    Yep. That's good stuff.

                    I like your points there and especially how you recast your mentee's copy to illustrate them.

                    Gives me interesting insights and approaches to emulate, which is exactly why I come here.

                    I really have to police my stuff to keep it "conversational," coming from a long background selling products targeting professionals and academics. Not to mention the "storytelling" aspect, which in most schools of thought is far less valuable in "b-to-b" than "b-to-c"...

                    (...outside of white papers, of course.)

                    Now getting into "b-to-c" I'm massaging my skills...
                    Well that guy was a bit of a smartarse - like you. But after I beat him about the head a few times with his copy...he hung in there...took it on the chin, punched on (which, incidentally is what I PMed Mark about - using the exact same words) and one day he'll make a good writer...and maybe we'll see him here being a cranky old man comme moi. I'll be dead and gone by then but at least I've passed the baton. Boring story - and the guys here have heard it a million times - but my first copywriting boss - in a major American advertising agency - used to reject EVERYTHING I effing wrote. Everything. I was on the verge of quitting...until the day he approved some copy and gave me a cigar. But I tell you what - it made me a much better writer.

                    (BTW nobody picked me up on my bullsh!t of marlin-fishing with Gary Halbert. I never met the man. But I was a game-fisherman (with my own 40 foot boat) and I did have a dream I went fishing for marlin with GH.)
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    • Profile picture of the author Raydal
      Originally Posted by The Copy Nazi View Post

      You'll hate me but I don't agree with some of this. For starters - keep it one-on-one. As soon as I read "I know a lot of you"... I lose interest. You mean you're talking to a whole bunch of people and not just me? You lose me right there.

      This stuff leaves me cold -
      I could give a sh!t.

      Again, I could care less. I'm tuned to WIIFM (What's in it for me?)

      "Win/win"??? Puke.

      "Take action" - double puke.

      "To your inevitable success"...now I'm dry retching. Hate that stuff. Hate it. "Uplifting" - my ass.

      "The Ultimate work at home miracle". Dude...seriously. That sucks.
      I really don't know if you are serious in these comments or not but
      everything you have written here ILLUSTRATES the points that
      Mark made and you use the same strategies in all your posts.

      And talking about Frank Kern, he tells a LOT about what's happening
      in his personal like--getting his 2 yr old to go to bed?

      So you are contradicting your own self. Find another example, not
      Frank.

      -Ray Edwards
      Signature
      The most powerful and concentrated copywriting training online today bar none! Autoresponder Writing Email SECRETS
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      • Profile picture of the author The Copy Nazi
        Banned
        Originally Posted by Raydal View Post

        I really don't know if you are serious in these comments or not but
        everything you have written here ILLUSTRATES the points that
        Mark made and you use the same strategies in all your posts.

        And talking about Frank Kern, he tells a LOT about what's happening
        in his personal like--getting his 2 yr old to go to bed?

        So you are contradicting your own self. Find another example, not
        Frank.

        -Ray Edwards
        What on earth are you on about? I said
        I don't agree with some of this
        and then I commented on what I disagreed with. Not contradicting myself at all. But the most important thing is - and perhaps you missed it - is... DON'T talk to the crowd - talk one on one.
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  • Profile picture of the author The Copy Nazi
    Banned
    Go read one of Frankie-boy's latest emails "send elephant tranquilizers (please)". That's how you write an email.

    (I have hundreds of personal emails between FK and moi that I've threatened to turn into a book. It would be a best-seller.)
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    • Profile picture of the author Mark Pescetti
      Originally Posted by The Copy Nazi View Post

      Go read one of Frankie-boy's latest emails "send elephant tranquilizers (please)". That's how you write an email.

      (I have hundreds of personal emails between FK and moi that I've threatened to turn into a book. It would be a best-seller.)
      The point of the post, Mal, was meant to spotlight adding a little more genuine personality in emails. That's it. The example I wrote wasn't meant to be stellar copy or something worthy of sending out. It was on-the-fly writing - without worrying too much about substance.

      I did write a few emails a couple months back to run some traffic to his doodle video affiliate offer, but I never did it.

      As far as Frank goes, yes, his whips out some awesome stuff.

      Mark
      Signature

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  • Profile picture of the author The Copy Warriors
    Great advice, as usual.

    I would just add one thing:

    Once you understand that "writing like you talk" is one key to better copy, I think it logically makes sense to zero in on a niche.

    If you target clients in niches that you are GENUINELY excited about, you're more likely to carry that enthusiasm and "realness" over into your copy.

    On the other hand, if you target clients whose business bores you, you'll likely be capable of nothing better than generic, cliche-ridden copy.

    Of course, there are exceptions to every rule. I once worked for a guy who was just a PRO at writing copy "by the book," he would kick ass in split tests and claim he just did it by following a formula. But I think people like that are the exception instead of the rule.
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  • Profile picture of the author ThomasOMalley
    Putting your personality into copy can certainly work well.

    Copy Nazi is a case in point. He certainly puts his personality into his posts. I find his comments entertaining to say the least (usually with some wise advice as well). WF would not be the same or as interesting without someone like him.
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  • Profile picture of the author max5ty
    The write like you talk thing is a bong induced idea.

    Dude, we all talk to people everyday...some we dig and others...

    You've got the "I know it all" that snoops out anyone that will listen. Yeah, they might know what they're talking about, but we're listening to their blabber trying to calculate how long it would take a swat team to show up if we took a hostage.

    Why?

    They have no clue how to influence people.

    Lots say President Obama is one of the best speech givers there is. Tons of people even decided to vote for him in 2008 because of his way with words. Crowds around the world listened to his stuff and went bat chit with praise.

    Raise your hand if you think he talks like that in his everyday life.

    Now, I know many copywriters here have clients wanting to sell their latest "How I make a big fat wad of cash every day" schemes...

    in that case, "Yo, sup..." probably would excite your gnarly dude base to buy.

    Of course you'll still be on the corner of "Yo sup..." and "Chillin out" avenue 5 years from now with a little cardboard sign looking for work, but hey...y o u a r e one cool dude.

    Some get teary eyed and weak kneed when "the rad way" some write is discussed. Chances are they're playing to your rebellious attitude...but it doesn't always equal sales.

    Think about this...

    the richest guys in the world aren't running companies that do nonsensical blab blab blab campaigns...it's calculated and designed to influence you into buying. They're not advertising like they talk in everyday life...they're advertising like they want you to think in everyday life.

    So my advice, use a conversational tone, but also get a clue on how to influence people.

    Thanks for sharing.
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    • Profile picture of the author Mark Pescetti
      Originally Posted by max5ty View Post

      The write like you talk thing is a bong induced idea.
      Weird statement. Not true. At least, not true - without understanding your context.

      It's like me saying...

      All women are bi-sexual.

      Originally Posted by max5ty View Post


      You've got the "I know it all" that snoops out anyone that will listen. Yeah, they might know what they're talking about, but we're listening to their blabber trying to calculate how long it would take a swat team to show up if we took a hostage.

      Why?

      They have no clue how to influence people.
      Okay, I get it. You were smoking a bong - just before writing this post, right?

      I kid, I kid...

      Writing like you talk does NOT mean you have to aimlessly blabber on. Again, I'm not sure where you're coming from.

      Originally Posted by max5ty View Post

      Lots say President Obama is one of the best speech givers there is. Tons of people even decided to vote for him in 2008 because of his way with words. Crowds around the world listened to his stuff and went bat chit with praise.

      Raise your hand if you think he talks like that in his everyday life.
      I personally find Obama robotic sounding. Not natural at all.

      Bill Clinton on the other hand...

      There's a guy who talks naturally... at least now.

      I remember at the last DNC, my wife said, "I understand why women want to blow him" after he finished his speech. That's a GREAT salesman.

      Originally Posted by max5ty View Post

      the richest guys in the world aren't running companies that do nonsensical blab blab blab campaigns...it's calculated and designed to influence you into buying. They're not advertising like they talk in everyday life...they're advertising like they want you to think in everyday life.
      You're talking about branding.

      I always say... Branding is choosing how you want people to think or perceive you. (So it makes sense to make your branding frickin rad, right?)

      Look at the latest (brilliant, but annoying) ad put out by Cadillac. It's influencing the hell outta people - triggering their American pride - somehow convincing people to work more to own one of their cars. Is the ad working? Ask Rick or Joe. I'm sure one of them knows.

      Originally Posted by max5ty View Post

      So my advice, use a conversational tone, but also get a clue on how to influence people.
      You should be influencing people - whether you're using brand/image advertising OR writing like you talk.

      Writing like you talk doesn't mean just blabbering on, like you've insinuated. It means connecting with people on a real level.

      Brand advertisers often try. Direct response writers definitely try. But again, most of us fail... and the copy ends up sounding like writing, not talking... except for Mal, of course.

      Mark
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      • Profile picture of the author max5ty
        Originally Posted by Mark Pescetti View Post


        You're talking about branding.

        I always say... Branding is choosing how you want people to think or perceive you. (So it makes sense to make your branding frickin rad, right?)
        Not true...and it's one of the many reasons branding attempts fail with so many.

        Most copywriters have no clue how to brand themselves. They (some) focus on creating an image of themselves. All wrong.

        Reading your sig, I assume you're working on "branding" yourself as a character from Mad Men...or a top clickbank writer. Neither of those two have a thing to do with branding.

        Now follow me here Mark, I know a thing or two about branding...

        Let's take Coke.

        What would you consider branding.

        The logo? The can design? Their image in the world? Their ads working on name recognition? Their recipe? That they beat Pepsi in a taste test?

        None of those are branding...just like the Mad Men reference in your sig.

        To truly get branding right, you have to understand what it is.

        It isn't working on how people think about or perceive you (like you said)...

        it's creating a feeling they get about you or your product.

        It's the "feeling" part that creates a brand.

        How do you feel when you think about Coke?

        How do you feel when you think about a certain copywriter?

        Quite sure some will say I'm being too technical, but it's the whole kit n kaboodle when it comes to branding. Using the right mental focus can change the whole outcome. Thus it's the reason I often sit back and chuckle at the so called branding experts who work on an image instead of working on a feeling.

        Now to the thing about writing like you talk...

        so hey, I've got this thing that you put like fruit and veggies in. You got a little plunger thing and you push them through this chute and it takes and squeezes the juice out into a little cup. The one I'm selling is pretty good. Some of the others I looked at were pretty cheap, but the one I got seems like it's a lot better.

        That could be a write like you talk pitch.

        But no, we take that and spruce it up with some selling tactics and make it so it influences our reader.

        Which is what I meant when I said use conversational writing...but learn to influence.

        Simply telling someone to write how they talk can be misleading.

        Just taking your headline at face value
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