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Where Did I Go Wrong With This Article?

by Jonathan 2.0 Banned
10 replies
Hi Gentlemen,
　
So I tried to make this post as inspiring/motivating and “valuable” as I could. However (it seems like) it completely bombed. : (

I now realize that I need to actually study this.

First though, I would like to ask for feedback: Where did I go wrong with the following post:

http://www.warriorforum.com/mind-war...s-failure.html

[Important note: I would greatly appreciate it if you would tell me what I did right as well as wrong.]

Additionally, what at some good ebooks/resources/etc. for writing motivating, persuasive, and valuable articles?

TIA.
#article #wrong
  • Profile picture of the author Chriswrighto
    In my experience, 90% of the Warriors don't want to do any work...

    Take 100% Responsibility...

    ...will switch people off.

    "Oh he's just another guy telling me I've got to be responsible for myself... I AM RESPONSIBLE!" *goes back to Facebook*

    Even though that section generally tends to be the go-getters of the forum.
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    • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
      Banned
      Originally Posted by Chriswrighto View Post

      In my experience, 90% of the Warriors don't want to do any work...

      Take 100% Responsibility...

      ...will switch people off.

      "Oh he's just another guy telling me I've got to be responsible for myself... I AM RESPONSIBLE!" *goes back to Facebook*

      Even though that section generally tends to be the go-getters of the forum.
      Thanks Chriswrighto. I didn't think of that. : )
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      "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
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  • Profile picture of the author Tim R
    What has this got to do with copywriting?

    Article writing and copywriting are not the same thing.

    Go take a look a copyblogger.com if you want some ideas.
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    • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
      Banned
      Originally Posted by Tim R View Post

      What has this got to do with copywriting?

      Article writing and copywriting are not the same thing.
      Copywriters are “Masters of Persuasion.” Craftsmen of the written word.

      And, in article writing, you have to “persuade” people to listen to what you're communicating etc.

      (There are several more overlaps.)
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      "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
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  • Profile picture of the author Tim R
    They are not the same thing. Plain and simple.

    You're better off posting this in the main forum, as it's off topic here.
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    • Profile picture of the author Benjamin Farthing
      Originally Posted by Tim R View Post

      They are not the same thing. Plain and simple.

      You're better off posting this in the main forum, as it's off topic here.
      They're not the same thing, but he's asking how to grab and keep people's attention in his article. There are plenty of copywriting techniques he could use to do that. It's not off topic.
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      • Profile picture of the author Tim R
        Originally Posted by Benjamin Farthing View Post

        They're not the same thing, but he's asking how to grab and keep people's attention in his article. There are plenty of copywriting techniques he could use to do that. It's not off topic.
        Agree to disagree, then.

        He's asking for feedback on an article. Not asking about his headline or anything specifically to do with copywriting, but what's wrong with the whole article.

        Does the copywriting forum really need to be opened up for everyone to ask for critiques on blog posts?
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        • Profile picture of the author Chriswrighto
          Originally Posted by Tim R View Post

          Agree to disagree, then.

          He's asking for feedback on an article. Not asking about his headline or anything specifically to do with copywriting, but what's wrong with the whole article.

          Does the copywriting forum really need to be opened up for everyone to ask for critiques on blog posts?
          We can assume that because he was posting in the copywriting section he wanted specifics on copywriting.

          Jonathan has been around a while, he knows the deal.

          (Even if he was pushing the boundaries a tad :p)
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  • Profile picture of the author RickDuris
    Give it a structure.

    First, give people a reason to read right up front. What's the big pay off? Preframe the content you're about to tell them in a way that makes them salivate for the info and appreciate it more when they're reading.

    Then summarize it at the end in way that allows them to apply to their own lives.

    - Rick Duris.

    PS: Study this: http://truthaboutfatburningfoods.com/special/
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  • Profile picture of the author Mark Pescetti
    The article or thread did bomb. Big time.

    There's ZERO specificity about what happens - WHEN you take responsibility (response-ability) in the big three areas of life. (i.e. money, health, love.... maybe add spirituality for the 4th.)

    My point is...

    People can't do much with abstract information.

    So IF you want readers to walk away with something they can immediately apply, you have to get specific.

    What circumstances am I going through?

    For instance...

    Let's say (and here's a big leap,) I want to make more money online.

    What does taking responsibility actually mean - if that's my agenda? Give me a step-by-step break down.

    Taking responsibility means NOTHING to people. You have to give context and execution... in every area of life.

    You should do an ebook or series of articles - focusing on different, specific aspects of what taking response-ability means and looks like.

    Maybe interview success product developers and affiliates.

    Talk about what they went through... and what taking responsibility meant in their process towards becoming financially and emotionally successful.

    Just a thought.

    Mark
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