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My new sales page ... please review

by rankwarrior
8 replies
I have just finished a new sales page, which I am not sure if I am happy with or not!

Conversion will be the deciding factor ... but before I launch, just wanted a few first impressions off you guys.

Let me know what you think.

www.rankwarrior.co.uk/limitedoffer
#page #review #sales
  • Profile picture of the author BestNoMoneySystem
    Hi Rankwarrior

    I'm not an expert, but I'll throw out my 2 cents.

    I'm using FireFox and your page is very wide (had to scroll over to see it) that could be a negative.

    The music in the background made me turn off my speakers.

    The blue links look too googleads'ish.

    Finally, I think I'd add some bullet graphics (call to action graphics), I think that would be more enticing.

    Hope that helps!
    Signature

    Kevin
    http://ColoradoGourmetKettleCorn.com
    Hand Popping 101+ Flavors of Gourmet Kettle Corn

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    • Profile picture of the author rankwarrior
      thanks kevin

      as far as the firefox thing, i know there are a few issues there that need sorting out.

      yeah, i also think it needs some more calls to action.
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    • Profile picture of the author rankwarrior
      thanks Loren, some good points.

      I have stuck to the 'video game' style since starting rankwarrior, and although it does come across as 'hype' ... it does stir some emotion in people.

      One of my main concerns was, as you pointed out, people will either love it or hate it.

      But ... I guess you can't be all things to all men!

      I will do a split test, with something more simple and see what kind of results I get.

      Thanks again for your valuable feedback!
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  • Profile picture of the author Loren Woirhaye
    Fun to look at. Hard to read though. I think your video upstages
    your letter and message - but, you know, the game is always
    changing. I would suggest your split test what you've got against
    a more traditional letter with black-on-white text and without the
    video.

    Your page may appeal to people who play video games and like
    comic books. Some people will love what you've done and others
    totally won't relate. The question is whether the people who like
    your style will buy.
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  • Profile picture of the author MonsterZero
    Right off the bat you encourage the reader to think about how many times he's wasted money on SEO products ... and you're selling the same thing to him. Worse, you admit that he's read your headline (or something similar) before.

    I don't see this as being a winning tactic.

    I find the checkout links to be excessive ... almost to the point where it makes you seem desperate. And it disrupts the flow of your copy.

    Overall, I'm just not sold. I think some strong bullets would help to build intrigue.
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    • Profile picture of the author rankwarrior
      Hi Monster,

      thanks for the feedback. the message I am trying to portrait is that all of these 'secret tactics' and 'exclusive formulas' that bombard most peoples email on a daily basis, are just pieces of a jigsaw ... where as I am offering the full A-Z.

      I'm starting to think maybe the headline is a bit old hat (Guaranteed Rankings...) , and has been overdone, so that is something that may need re working.
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      • Profile picture of the author MonsterZero
        rankwarrior,

        Yeah, I get where you were going with that ... I just don't know if you've done a thorough job of washing the doubts away.

        If you're going to encourage doubt ... well, you'd better follow with something really strong.

        I think you could probably get there with more work, but there may be easier approaches than the one you've chosen.
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  • Profile picture of the author Scott Murdaugh
    The Mortal Kombat music is annoying, IMO, and it may even land you in hot water for using it for commercial purposes.

    Your headline is waaay overplayed and pretty damn vague... "Dominate Google" rah rah rah.

    You're wasting your prime real estate, the space above the fold, with a huge graphic that adds nothing to the sales process.

    I don't like the colors or the layout... What I like or don't like doesn't matter, but my gut tells me that a more traditional layout will work better.

    I have no idea what separates your SEO course from your competition... And when you've got SEO Book and BIG name established competitors, you'd better have a strong USP... I don't see a USP at all.

    The "What you'll learn" sidebar... "Answers not keywords", "initial planning phase"... That does absolutely nothing to tell me what I'll get out of this product.

    You introduce your price before I know what you're selling, and then try to justify the price later.

    The dozen or so order links throughout the copy are distracting, they force me to stop reading and lose my train of thought.

    And ... guess what ... most of those so-called "secret tactics" or "underground methods" don't even provide a fraction of what you will get from the "Ultimate Google Fighting Tactics".
    So what do I get that they don't offer?

    There's no bullets to compel me. There's no sub heads to scan.

    There's no guarantee.

    I'm practically giving it away at that price!
    No, you're not. You're selling it for £27 and I have no clue what kind of info I'm getting.

    You claim to have made £35 million in 2008 with no proof to back it up... What was the site? What did you do that was so special...

    And I could go on and on and on...

    I need A LOT more information on WHY I should buy before I'm spending that much money on an SEO guide...

    I say back to the drawing board with this one.

    Good luck.

    -Scott
    Signature

    Over $30 Million In Marketing Data And A Decade Of Consistently Generating Breakthrough Results - Ask How My Unique Approach To Copy Typically Outsells Traditional Ads By Up To 29x Or More...

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