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Need Email Marketing Feedback

by seanpbh
4 replies
I am trying to write up my first email marketing follow up series and need a bit of feedback to guide me in the right direction.

I have pasted my first 4 emails here Email Test | business cards

I am trying to lay them out going by a post I read which said, 3 information emails,
presell then hard sell.

Any feedback would help

Thanks
#email #feedback #marketing
  • Profile picture of the author copymyideas
    Hi Sean.

    What are people opting into prior to getting this email series? Is it a free report on business cards? Have you got a landing page yet? How many leads have you generated?
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    • Profile picture of the author smismi
      Create a character and magic landing page and go skuplati contacts so you will see the best results
      Signature
      Earn Extra Money From Home

      Total Financial Freedom in 6-12 Weeks?
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      • Profile picture of the author Chriswrighto
        Do people really care enough about their business cards to read emails from you?

        I wouldn't.

        (Although they could be opting in from a page for business card lovers. )

        But if you made the "hook" on gaining more business, making more money, etc etc then I would.



        Right now your emails are dull and ALL of them look like spam.

        People want to be sold to... but only if you bring them enough value first.

        Here's some ideas:
        • Write a few stories.
        • Create a hero.
        • Write about a past experience where business cards have benefitted you.
        • Make it FUN.

        Chris
        Signature

        Wealthcopywriter.com :)

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  • Profile picture of the author JohnMcCabe
    Before I get down to brass tacks, a couple of observations...

    > You picked "one of those" domain names. When I saw it loading for your examples, what I saw was "elite BS cards". Probably not a major factor, but you don't want to be sending any signals, either.

    > In your first email, you use the phrase "don't know how much business they're loosing." The word you want is "losing", with one O. I see this all the time and it drives me crazy. Lose is the opposite of gain. Loose is the opposite of tight.

    Picky? Maybe. But the devil is in the details. You have other grammar issues as well. You're trying to sell a professional service to professionals here.

    On to the brass tacks...

    > I agree that the messages themselves are boring. Not only that, they're asking (and answering) the wrong questions. Business cards are your business, so you care about them.

    No one cares enough to ask themselves "are business cards still relevant?" The question they're asking is "why do I still need them?" You have an excellent answer, but it's buried.

    > In your sell email, you mention that people are telling you about increasing business with your cards. Prove it. Get permission to reprint the emails as testimonials.

    > You also have a good point when you talk about DIY design. Drive it home with real examples, the worst you can find.

    These are just a few quick observations, but I hope they help you out.
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