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would like constructive criticism

by derb540
7 replies
Hey all I was wondering if I could get a few people to look at my lead capture page and give me some feed back.This was made with free tools ie Adkreator and Trafficwave autoresponder 30 day trial.I also was wondering is it better to send people to a lcp then the sales vid and then to the offer or like I have it set up now video lcp to offer.Here is the link Squeeze Pages (full design)
To Admins and Mods this not an attempt to advertise in here just want some feedback .
Thanks Darren
#constructive #criticism
  • Profile picture of the author kindsvater
    The weird font threw me off and was distracting, causing me to tune out the video as it droned on. What's with the "G" tying to the "E"?

    .
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  • Profile picture of the author Gambino
    Didn't watch the sales pitch video because personally, I find them extremely annoying. I rarely watch them, unless there's just something extremely captivating that forces me to hit play. There was literally no text that told me anything about anything so... If I landed on that page I'd be gone in less than a second.

    The design doesn't look bad. I agree with the text... It looks weird. I'd say add more info, perhaps just a graphic explaining what it is so users can look at it and within 10 seconds or so opt in if its something they're interested in.
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  • Profile picture of the author seobro
    Hi Derb:
    I saw your sales video and I want to be nice. Bro, that girl is so annoying. Hope she is not your cousin. Try to find some one more appealing, even if they are only semi pro, that will hold our interest, as she seems to be a bit of a nag. Video needs more work and get a pro to help you. BTW, there are only nine views.

    Actress need to work on her diction some more. She just rambles on. Do not like her voice. It is like fingernails on a chalk board - hard on my ears.

    Let me add, please have a give away promo. Like a free e-book is great to encourage people to sign up. Also, what is with your curving arrow. Please do redesign the squeeze page. Have it done by a pro.

    All the best to you.
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  • Profile picture of the author SchoolofKA
    Originally Posted by derb540 View Post

    Hey all I was wondering if I could get a few people to look at my lead capture page and give me some feed back.This was made with free tools ie Adkreator and Trafficwave autoresponder 30 day trial.I also was wondering is it better to send people to a lcp then the sales vid and then to the offer or like I have it set up now video lcp to offer.Here is the link Squeeze Pages (full design)
    To Admins and Mods this not an attempt to advertise in here just want some feedback .
    Thanks Darren
    How about a different color palette? One that is warmer or more inviting. The burgandy brown doesn't really do it for me.
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  • Profile picture of the author DWaters
    I actually thought thw woman on the video was OK, except she seemed to be saying "blah. blah. blah" .... just sort of lose interest as nothing grabbed my interest quicky, which you need to do. Nothing immediately made me think "Yes this does sound like a good opportunity!" The page looked OK except everything was close to the top, at least thats how my browser showed it. It could be a bit more centered.

    Also - it seemed like the actual name which I gues would be 5 dollar wonder biz should be more noticable.
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  • Profile picture of the author hilear
    Well..........

    The page is simple which is a good thing but.
    The background color of the ad is such a downer. I would actually prefer just a plain white background.
    Make the Headline a font and color that pops on a white background.
    Maybe change the headline to something like
    Simple Copy, Paste, Post Formula
    GETS YOU PAID!

    The video I did not watch. It looks just like all of those make money videos you see. I would rather see you describe the product and offering your help.....or no video at all. Instead 2-3 bullets of what they get or probs it solves.

    The good news is you have a library of squeeze pages from people who are very successful right here on the WF. Check them out. Note what looks good and what you personally like and then translate that design nto your own template.

    Good Luck!
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  • Profile picture of the author Brent Stangel
    I hate when forms won't allow auto-fill. WTF??

    If you want to be taken seriously then buy your own domain and hosting. And/ or lose the affiliate links. Very amateurish and cheezy.
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