How To Make Money Online Step One

Howdy folks,

You know, folks been askin me how I be makin money online! It is really not all that constipated and I will be tellin you how... well, I ain't gonna exactly TELL you how but I am shore gonna tell you a story and see who can figger out the secret...

Down here in the holler we has a fellar called Dookie and his IQ is somewhere in the neighborhood of 4 (We made him a teacher at the local school cause he was so smart)!

The other day Ole Dookie rode his horse into the holler to buy some things to go along with his vittles. He rode his up to the hitchin post at the Holler Vittles & Viennie Sausages and climbed down off that critter! He immediately went to the back of that there horse, lifted his tail (not Dookie's tail but the horses tail) and kissed that varmint right on it's behind! Well sir, I was gobsmacked (I learnt that word from Kim Standerline) and I says to him, I says "Dookie, did you just do what I think I saw you do?" Dookie replied, "You shore did, Thad!" (He called me that cause that's my name!) I said, "Why in tarnation did you do something like that fer?" and he said, "I done it cause I gots some really bad chapped lips!" "Does that cure them?" "Nope, but it durn shore makes shore I don't lick 'em!"

Now, that there story contains one of the most basic but extremely important rules about making money online! Can any of you folks tell me what that main rules is?