Salesletter for Web Design Business

[Nitro]

Hey fellow warriors,

I have a small Web Design business and somebody told me basically that my salesletter pitch (if you could call it that) sucks, that it doesn't sell, which is why my sales have been down.

I am in the midst of re-designing my site, to make it more catchy and professional and was wondering if I should re-write what I have on? or maybe hire someone to write it for me?

What do you think? Is there someone that you could recommend? I welcome all PM's if you are someone who can help me for a decent price.

My current website is in my signature if you have any pointers.

Thanks!

Aaron

[Loren Woirhaye]

Well... your site is pretty forgettable and unspecific.

While I'm sure you strive to deliver:
* Great Rates
* 100% Customer Satisfaction
* Friendly Service
* Professional Designs

... the truth is that consumers and business owner have been
so over-marketed to with such chest-thumping, "We're the
best because... we're the best!" type thing, they pretty much
just ignore it and ask:

"Where's the BeeF?"

(Not-really)

Actually what happens is they wonder for half-a-second
how much it costs or what kind of specials you have or
"what's this company got going for it the competition doesn't?",
click on one or two of your headings, don't find any specific
offer or element that hooks their attention... doesn't find
it, and sidles-off across the street to check out the competition.

In short: You are losing the battle for the buyer's mind here,
and the root of the cause is a lack of specificity, front
and center, about why they shouldn't leave your site in less
than 5-seconds...

...in other words, when you answer the question "what can
I do for my customers that they both want and need and
how can a communicate that advantage instantly to every
visitor?" then you will be on the way to having a viable
USP (unique selling proposition) around which you can build
a presence in the marketplace.

[BlueSquares]

Here's your competition. Ramp up your game.

Minisite Frog :: Minisite Design, Graphics, eCovers and Templates
Design Guru Ryan: Result Driven Direct Response & Minisite Designer
eCoverArtist: Professional eCover Design - 3D Book Cover Graphics

[Fernando Veloso]

Aaron, don't go changing everything JUST because others have this and that.

Different markets want different approaches: You need to focus on your target market before you think about your own design/sales pitch.

The sites above may work well for some people while others choose some less BANG sites.

Just my 2 cents.

[JohnMcCabe]

Aaron, you've made a typical designer mistake. You have a few 'cool' graphical things going on (the little hitch in your menu, the flash software thing, the lightbox faq) and very little real content.

Your only testimonial is rather weak. It says you got the work done on time and the site was ok. Those are conditions of entry if you really want to compete. You want people testifying that they generated real results (leads, sales, profits, even opt-ins) because of your work.

Picky note: on your prices page, Americans typically put the $ before the numbers ($100, not 100$).

Last thing - if your prospects are a little older, the smallish light type on the gray background can be hard to read. I'd up both the font size and the contrast, and consider switching to dark type on a light background for your text areas.

Good luck to you...

[Nitro]

Thanks everyone for your comments, it seems that I have a lot to think about