How comfortable are you talking with people?

[TimCastleman]

In talking a lot with offline marketers and people who are interested the subject seems to come up about having to talk to a live human being at some point during the sales process.

Some people seem really bothered by talking to another human being while others don't have a care in the world about it.

So I am wondering how comfortable would you be selling something face to face or at least over the phone and if you knew you had to do such a thing would you even attempt it?

Tim

[jbode]

I think it is something you have to try a few times and see how it goes... it's easier to sell to someone over the phone because they have more trust in you and you are offering direct help for their current issues.

[Sid Kaplan]

Having been in sales most of my life and knowing talking to people is how I put bread on the table, I have have to say very very comfortable. The key is in believing in yourself and being an effective listener and communicator.

Folks need to be heard and acknowledged and once you build rapport you have a very good shot at helping them get what it is they need or want.

[Lisa Gergets]

I am very, very comfortable talking to people...in fact, I LOVE meeting new people in darn near any situation. I just love people. What I don't love is the automatic distrust that comes with selling anything.

[dv8]

I've been in sales for years. Used to sell over the phone and then meet them in person as well. Also did door to door and cold calling in another business....that is tough!

I think alot of "online people" are the main ones who don't want to talk to someone. Hence them selling online.

[Sid Kaplan]

When you really think about it, all of us are selling daily moment by moment. How about getting a date - selling yourself and the benefits right? How about getting a job, negotiating for a car or home. Keeping a relationship going?

The basic fear is one of rejection and the healthiest way to look at that is - it may be what you are selling that is rejected not you personally.

Also, I found it helpful to think of a rejection as a request for more information :-)

[TimCastleman]

Sid -

I agree completely. Once I realized that women who didn't want to date you would go out of their way to be nice in saying no I started asking every girl I saw.

I went from zero dates to 2-4 dates a week for several months.

But I had to chance how I saw the whole situation and understand that the worst anyone can say to me is no.

Just wanted to get the opinion of others. Keep them coming.

Tim

[myob]

I particularly enjoy meeting new people and giving speeches. That actually is how much of my sales are generated. When you think about it, selling face to face is much easier than online because you have the nuances of non-verbal visual expressions to anticipate objections.

[DogScout]

I used to Finance cars and sell them before that. Before cars it was beer after Pepsi after furniture, so I have been making a living putting THEM at ease quickly for a long time. (Interestingly enough, my writing style can be a bit off; I'm working on it.)

[DogScout]

Originally Posted by TimCastleman

Sid -

I agree completely. Once I realized that women who didn't want to date you would go out of their way to be nice in saying no I started asking every girl I saw.

I went from zero dates to 2-4 dates a week for several months.

But I had to chance how I saw the whole situation and understand that the worst anyone can say to me is no.

Just wanted to get the opinion of others. Keep them coming.

Tim

In college, we'd just ask them if they wanted to have sex. 9 out of ten said no; but you only had to ask 10.

[Profit-smart]

Originally Posted by TinkerAndPo

I am very, very comfortable talking to people...in fact, I LOVE meeting new people in darn near any situation. I just love people. What I don't love is the automatic distrust that comes with selling anything.

Then dont sell them something!

Make them *ask* you for it!

In face to face negotiating, never *Ever* make yourself seem like a salesperson. Leave wiggle room, build a rappot around them, get them to tell you why *they* need your product-Remember, they dont want your product because its shiny and can do X things. They want it because they want to look cool when they use it, and because they need something to do X things for THEM.

Its ALL about them, never ever about the product.

[Rick Ostler]

I have been in sales and service for over 40 years. I always found if your comfortable and believe in what your selling......then your comfortable selling on any platform.

[l23bc]

Before i turned to online marketing and cpa networks and just working online i used to work here in the uk in the telecoms mobile network industry(o2 vodafone ect)

on some very high accounts as a retentions cutsomer advisor, i used to be a shy person but once you know i guess how to approch and talk to people like how i would to my friends and family then my shell cracked and got into the role..great days

i guess it depends on the people i mean some people love being quiet and reserved yet some like me love being very outgoing and personal when needed too,


its all about building a rappor not sales anyway i beleive

andrew

Originally Posted by TimCastleman

In talking a lot with offline marketers and people who are interested the subject seems to come up about having to talk to a live human being at some point during the sales process.

Some people seem really bothered by talking to another human being while others don't have a care in the world about it.

So I am wondering how comfortable would you be selling something face to face or at least over the phone and if you knew you had to do such a thing would you even attempt it?

Tim

[TommyBussey]

I like talking with people. Especially in person because it is easier to establish a connection with them, which can help you gain their trust faster.

When I meet new people I always ask specific questions after I ask the general ones...and I pay very close attention to the answers. If you can spot the things that people have a passion for (or at least an interest) then you can connect with them by focusing on that passion/interest during your initial conversations. Of course, this technique requires that you are "in tune" with a lot of different subject matter.

[TimCastleman]

Originally Posted by DogScout

In college, we'd just ask them if they wanted to have sex. 9 out of ten said no; but you only had to ask 10.

You sir owe me a new laptop. I just spit out my drink reading you comments.

[achivement84]

Originally Posted by Sid Kaplan

The key is in believing in yourself and being an effective listener and communicator.

I agree with you , i worked in direct sales for only 4 months just after my graduation, it`s not long period but i knew that your self confidence and believe in what you are presenting to others is the main factor to their trust on you, if you sell some good and you don`t think it`s the perfect choice for any one , so your client will feel that and the opposite is true.So just trust on your self and on what you are selling.

[mr2020]

Tim,

I am extremely comfortable. Talking with people is perhaps the best way to learn from them. And that makes us money.

Mr Twenty Twenty

[DogScout]

Originally Posted by TimCastleman

You sir owe me a new laptop. I just spit out my drink reading you comments.

Sorry, true story. We were not in a frat but always scored at every tfrat party. The frat boys hated us. Never had a clue what we were doing with 'their' sorority girls.

[TimCastleman]

Oh I understand. I have a friend who is ugly as sin but has no problems with the ladies. His secret ... he waits til the end of the night and starts asking who wants to come home with him. 90% of the time he doesn't go home alone.

[kf]

A friend used to ask a similar question with a twist of adding on 'You wanna have sex and a beer'. He got slapped in the face a lot, but he never went home alone.

And he always had a great comeback ..'what's the matter, don't you drink?'

Of course women would *never* ask those kinds of questions ... b/c they're always get a yes.

Originally Posted by DogScout

In college, we'd just ask them if they wanted to have sex. 9 out of ten said no; but you only had to ask 10.

Now to answer the OP question ....

Many years ago I had lunch with a man who had sold financial investments all his life. He was near retirement, very charming. I was struggling with sales/rejection and a mutual friend set up the lunch so I could pick his brain.

I gave him a long story about how I felt about it (blah, blah, blah) and he very bluntly said 'nothing could be easier. and it's not about you at all. if you have something you think will help them, you have an obligation to let them know about it. then, they either want it or they don't.'

He was a great man who made a living selling who had learned to keep it really simple. I've never forgotten.

[AndrewCavanagh]

I'll be completely honest with you.

I don't WANT to go out of my way to talk to people.

People assume I must be a natural at speaking with people because I seem to be so good at it and so relaxed.

It took me quite a long time and a lot of hard experience to get that way.

There are key areas in your interaction with other people that can make the process go smoothly and far more enjoyable...or you can screw those areas up and it will be a very rocky road indeed.


I stongly suggest three things:

# 1: Read the book How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. Preferably read it multiple times (after about the 5th or 6th reading you start to get it.

# 2: Practice making eye contact, smiling and saying hi to everyone you pass in public (or as many people as you can).

That will help you break the "fear of communicating with strangers" pattern.

# 3: Learn to ask questions, listen and be genuinely interested in helping the people you talk to.


If you do those things even if you're like me and you don't want to talk to people you'll find you WILL be talking to a LOT of people and those people will want to talk to you.

Kindest regards,
Andrew Cavanagh

[Sid Kaplan]

Originally Posted by DogScout

In college, we'd just ask them if they wanted to have sex. 9 out of ten said no; but you only had to ask 10.

Famous Kirby Vacuum Cleaner survey. For every 20 who say no, one will say yes. I like your odds better but same thing. Keep on asking and that is what takes the courage (man you had great success).

[TimCastleman]

Dating is no different than marketing.
-------------------------------------------

Get a target market (the type of girl/guy you want)

Market to them (go where they are/will be)

Sell your goods and SERVICES to them

Oh and if the market test fails you lose half of your money

[Andy Thompson]

Living is no different than Marketing

I mean you are selling all the time - ideas to your family and coworkers etc.

I find the biggest problem people have is not talking but listening - you need to let people talk - firstly everyone like the sound of their own voice, secondly you get the last word, and thirdly you can target that word to everything you have learned about them whilst they have been talking

These are lessons I expand upon on my blog - Personal Devlopment for Wealth Builders where I am going through How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie in a posting and video per chapter.

[Kevin Riley]

Very comfortable. In fact, some folks wish I would shut up.

[TimCastleman]

Originally Posted by Kevin Riley

Very comfortable. In fact, some folks wish I would shut up.

No more than me Kevin, no more that me.

Tim

[Josef_Benjamin]

My secret formula for meeting new people and making new friends with people I want to meet is this:

1. I ALWAYS assume we're friends before I say one word (at first you'll mess up and look creepy, pretty soon your frame will totally make the stranger feel the same about you)

2. Give SINCERE compliments. People see something they like on somebody but are to scared to say "hey, I' like that piece you have on you" because it's socially accepted that people don't have the gut's to say what's on their mind not only to the person wearing the peice...but in front of other people.

3. ALWAYS make an effort to turn the conversation to THEM and what they like, desire, dream or want. This is the hardest because everybody like's talking about themselves...but I've met some beautifull women and some chill guy's by directing and guiding the conversation with open questions that brings out a PASSION in them - not me.

Make Eye Contact. Smile (genuinly). And say your greeting with enthusiams and energy.

Also, I carry around a little notebook of questions I use for female and male conversations...with female conversations almost always leaning way on the sexual side if I'm interested.

Biggest Secret...

Learn how to improv.

Improversation is by far one of the best skills all people persons I know have. It's not hard, it takes practice, but it's simply allowing yourself to "say" what you want to say anyway without fear of what people think about you.

Obviously this post has gone long enough, but it's clear I love people and interaction so much I go out and practice and have fun meeting so many unique personalities almost every day.

Making money online has allowed me to meet even more people, make new male friends and date even more beautful women

[kfilliez]

If you know your product, it is super easy selling over the phone. Confidence is key...

Just like in dating. If you can sell yourself to a stranger in a bar (not in the way you guys are thinking - he he) you can sell someone over the phone.

Back- many, many moons ago - I cold called business to business out of the yellow pages selling trinkets and trash....Got hung up on lots but if you grow by 10-15 sales a day (after making an excruciating 200-300 calls) you were successful. Your leads grew and after a year or so you end up just calling past customers and reselling them.

This method obviously is easier, quicker, and less hostile over the internet. Start a web page and get an autoresponder. It the modern method of doing the same thing. If you need to call your list, at least they are 'warm' calls.

Good Luck

Kirstin Filliez

[archiebunk]

I don't know why but sometimes talking to people can be uncomfortable.
If I walk into a bar where I don't know anybody I'm very uncomforable.
If I know some of the people, then I can get started, I can talk to anyone with no proplem.
I used to do the state fair curcuit I had no problem talking to anybody.
If I had a product I was selling I had no problem talking to strangers. But put me in a room where I don't know anybody, terrible.

[Tinkerbell]

On a comfort scale of 1 to 10 with 1 being very uncomfortable and 10 being very comfortable, I'd have to say my score would be somewhere around -127. I'm terrified of talking to other people...even in text!

I have a real fear someone will make me feel stupid. LOL

[DogScout]

Originally Posted by kf

Now to answer the OP question ....

Was in car biz 25+ years. You don't sell cars not talking to people.

[MissTerraK]

I personally adore talking with people and have been in sales for quite a few years! I used to sell women's fashions and lingerie that was suitable for "from the boardroom to the bedroom" !

I especially loved doing presentations, for either if it were one on one or to a whole group, company policy was we had to wear pieces of our line from the clothing, jewelry, handbags, beauty products, to the shows and I never had a problem with selling in person! As a matter of fact, I have many Top Sales plaques, tropheys, and prizes littered all over the house!

A few witty stories, explanations on how to put pieces together, literally show them by wearing the product, tips on what they could do with them not only got sales, but lots of referrals and return customers and invitations for more group presentations!

I love talking to people because I love to talk! So as you've discovered, LOL!
MissTerrak

[Keith Boisvert]

Originally Posted by TimCastleman

In talking a lot with offline marketers and people who are interested the subject seems to come up about having to talk to a live human being at some point during the sales process.

Some people seem really bothered by talking to another human being while others don't have a care in the world about it.

So I am wondering how comfortable would you be selling something face to face or at least over the phone and if you knew you had to do such a thing would you even attempt it?

Tim

I am comfortable selling face to face, but not in a cold calling situation. To just walk off the street unannounced I simply wont do it. But if a person approaches me, I can talk all day long.

I hired a sales women to do the face to face cold calling stuff for me(strictly commission based). But to be honest, I have never needed to cold call to get business.

keith

[TimCastleman]

Wow this thing came back from the dead. Good to see so many people say they are comfortable talking with people. Makes all the emails and excuses I get from coaching students about not feeling comfortable talking with people puzzling. Oh course it did allow me to figure out the new thing I teach in Offline Marketing ... so that is nice.

Every minus has a plus.

At any rate, thanks for input.

[jedz]

I've been in this business for almost 3 years now.
I think being comfortable when talking to people/clients depends on the mood of the person that you're talking with. If you feel that this person is not interested with the product or services that you're offering, it will give you some negative impression that will result for not being comfortable.

[NightWriter]

I've done lots of face to face sales - including time share! If you want to learn sales, those people are some of the most expert sales people I've ever run across.

I would not feel comfortable with telephone sales - never done it. I live in a state that takes illegal telemarketing very seriously. I've actually sued a persistent caller before via the attorney general's office. I swear like a drunken sailor at overly aggressive telephone sales people who rudely - and illegally - disrupt my work, my thoughts, my sleep, my bath time, my movie time, etc.

The only way I could do telephone sales was if it was B2B with a qualified list of people who actually want to be called. Then, I'm sure I 'd be fine.

I have really become a hermit over the last year. I was nearly murdered a little over a year ago - uniformed police were involved. Unfortunately, this isn't the first time something like this has happened to me. Generally speaking, however, I generally like other people. I like that we are all unique creatures and I have very much enjoyed doing face-to-face sales. I had a genuine love for my bookstore customers when I had my brick and mortar stores.

I think you have to take a natural interest in people to be able to do sales well. You have to be able to put yourself in the other person's shoes.

[BIG Mike]

Originally Posted by TimCastleman

In talking a lot with offline marketers and people who are interested the subject seems to come up about having to talk to a live human being at some point during the sales process.

Some people seem really bothered by talking to another human being while others don't have a care in the world about it.

So I am wondering how comfortable would you be selling something face to face or at least over the phone and if you knew you had to do such a thing would you even attempt it?

Tim

I'm pretty much a natural facilitator, so don't have any problems doing it, although my own preference is doing it face-to-face.

[kohaku]

Well it's much easyier to communicate online than to face real people.
We are on our way to become some kind of robots aren't we?

I think many people nowadays are afraid of facing others and talk to them. Kind a sad don't you think?

[MichaelHiles]

I can talk to anyone, anywhere, about anything without reserve.

[MissTerraK]

Originally Posted by MichaelHiles

I can talk to anyone, anywhere, about anything without reserve.

I double that and also add, I'm not afraid to talk to anybody!
MissTerraK

[845]

I have noticed that talking to people is definitely one of my biggest weaknesses. Now that I have come to this realization I have simply been practicing talking to more and more people. Fortunately, the most important step is identifying the problem.

IMHO, if you view talking to people with trepidation the best way to fix this is to dive head long into that fear.

[Kevin Barnes]

I actually enjoy talking to people face to face.. If you really believe in what your selling it the best way to sell, because you can't help but sell!! it just comes natural when you talk about it...

One of my favorite things to do is what I call infield training... it's where me and my buddy get together and go to like a mall or downtown and try to sell items we get at the dollar store for double the cost. It really helps.. and you would be suprized how many people buy that stuff for more than you payed for it.

Its kinda like golf.. some days you got it, some days you don't.

[bfletch]

I am very comfortable with face to face sales. Before I was an internet marketer I was in a retail business. Most of my sales came from either face to face sales or phone sales. I kind of miss it but the economy did a number on that business so I had to find an alternative.

[MichaelHiles]

Originally Posted by MissTerraK

I double that and also add, I'm not afraid to talk to anybody!
MissTerraK

I tend to be too transparent. Since I am not easily offended by many topics, I typically cross over to what others consider to be taboo or uncomfortable subjects easily.

Like... "HONEY! COME HERE AND SEE WHAT I JUST DID IN THE TOILET!!"

[TracyNeedham]

As for the results here being so different from what you here--there may be a bit of bias in that people comfortable on the phone are also quite comfortable posting in forums...

Personally, I hate having the money conversation on the phone, in person, sitting down, upside down or whatever. Often, I get around it by doing a proposal. But that doesn't always work.

[CDarklock]

Originally Posted by TimCastleman

Some people seem really bothered by talking to another human being while others don't have a care in the world about it.

I'm way too drunk to answer this effectively, so pardon me while I ramble.

Most people are fully aware that they suck. The problem is that they forget everyone else sucks, too. So they sit around going "man, I suck" without ever figuring out that all you have to do is suck a little less than the next guy. Almost nobody hires the greatest. They just hire the guy who sucks a little less. Sure, you suck. I suck, too. But one of us sucks less than the other, and if we both throw our hat in for a job, that one will get the job. Sit on your arse and say nothing? I'll get it. Even if I suck more than you.

I'm going to shut up now.

[rconejr]

I was in real estate sales and made a point of 30 contacts a day minimum, everyday period. I simply said "Hi I'm Shelly I'm a real estate agent, here's a handout on what the market is doing, if you're ever in the market or know someone who is call me," and I'd leave. But on the second or third time I'd call they'd actually stop and think who they knew. Got top salesperson that way.

It was always scary as hell when I'd start out for the day and sometimes just saying "hi my name is ..." would get people yelling at me (for all they knew I could've been there to hand them a million dollars) but I knew that out of those 30 contacts I'd get about 5 good leads.

Guess it wasn't so much that I was comfortable selling but just focused and totally believed that the numbers will work. Oh and that I shouldn't take things personally.

[MissTerraK]

Originally Posted by MichaelHiles

I tend to be too transparent. Since I am not easily offended by many topics, I typically cross over to what others consider to be taboo or uncomfortable subjects easily.

Like... "HONEY! COME HERE AND SEE WHAT I JUST DID IN THE TOILET!!"

Yikes, Mike! LOL! I'm not afraid to talk about anything, but umm, maybe somethings to some people! Somehow I don't see making things in the toilet a big money maker though!
MissTerraK

[Danton Morgan]

Tim,

My experience with "selling" has been primarily in convincing existing customers or warm prospects to use my company's products and services in the right way and to change their internal business practices if need be to match established best practices (those best practices, of course, involved the use of my company's tools).

I was very comfortable doing this. I believed in my companies tools and I saw the company's clients reap the benefits of following best practices. That came across in my presentations and I was very successful at it.

However, now that I'm on my own, starting my own business with my own products, I'm in a new realm. I don't have (at least not yet) professional salespeople to bring the customers to the table. I have to do it myself, now. This presents me with a challenge.

Where before I could count on the fact that the people I was talking to had a basic understanding of my company's industry, tools and services and were in general agreement that my company could help them reduce costs and work better, now I'm starting at ground zero with every new prospect. I have to educate them not only about how to use my products effectively, but also about why they need my products in the first place.

It's a new world for me. But, I'm looking forward to the challenge. Social media/web 2.0 tools are going to be a big part of my online marketing efforts. And while these are not exactly face-to-face interactions, they ARE personal interactions. And I think that will be the key to reaching, and educating, my target market.

- Danton

[pink sapphire]

I wouldn't be comfortable at all - I'm not a particularly social person at the best of times, and I especially hate talking on the phone, even to people I know. That's why I love working online - I can communicate exclusively through writing, which suits me much better.