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what does "HELP" mean in this case?

by wassim
11 replies
Hello Warriors,

I so often get emails from people I know, requesting to have some web services, but I never understand if it's a paid project or not. Regular clients actually send me a quotation request along with description of their projects, so I never have a problem with that. But sometimes I receive emails from people I know and they send things like the following:

* Hi Wassim... I would like to create a new website about xxx Can you help me with?

* Hello Wassim... Can you help me create one little logo about xxx

And lots lots more similar emails I got within the past years....

Most of these people are people I actually know (my real friends, or people I've met once or twice) and some of them are people I know well through the internet only, but kind of are my friends too.

How can I know if these are real projects or things they want me to do for free? Sometimes I feel shy to ask if you know this feeling...

Can you please pretend what do they mean by "HELP"... and why people use the word "HELP" instead of "Project" or so on...

Please note that people sending me this kind of emails, know very well that *YES I CAN HELP* them do what they are asking for...

In my opinion when people say "HELP" it means "FREE"... What do you think? And how should I reply back to them to avoid this misunderstanding?

Regards,
Wassim
#case
  • Profile picture of the author ForumJoiner
    I've encountered this many times. In my case, there were two categories : friends and acquaintances.

    For the true friends, I did for free what they asked me. For the acquaintances, I said upfront "I'll be glad to help. My rate is $x an hour, but I'll offer you $y per hour." Of course, y < x

    Some of them accepted and made the deal. Others were frustrated, went to other people who didn't do them a good job, then came back to me. Obviously, I charged $x and they were happy with $x.

    If you know that you do a good job, then you have to sort the requests by category (friends/ acquaintances). As the dictionary says : an acquaintance is less intimate than a friend. Friends have top priority.

    If it's hard to decide if a person is a friend or not, reverse the situation. Ask him for a favor and see how he reacts.

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    • Profile picture of the author wassim
      Thanks for the advice. This is something I already consider. But I never actually thought about reversing the situation.

      Originally Posted by ForumJoiner View Post

      I've encountered this many times. In my case, there were two categories : friends and acquaintances.

      For the true friends, I did for free what they asked me. For the acquaintances, I said upfront "I'll be glad to help. My rate is an hour, but I'll offer you per hour." Of course, y < x

      Some of them accepted and made the deal. Others were frustrated, went to other people who didn't do them a good job, then came back to me. Obviously, I charged and they were happy with .

      If you know that you do a good job, then you have to sort the requests by category (friends/ acquaintances). As the dictionary says : an acquaintance is less intimate than a friend. Friends have top priority.

      If it's hard to decide if a person is a friend or not, reverse the situation. Ask him for a favor and see how he reacts.

      Sergiu FUNIERU
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  • Profile picture of the author jwlnewsome
    Hi, sound like good advise from lunlun about asking for a favour in return. I always offer a friends and family rate to people I consider close. That way everybody gets charged and generally know not to ask for freebees. Having said that i wouldn't charge my mum.
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  • Profile picture of the author Diana Lane
    Just reply with 'Sure. How much are you looking to spend?'

    'Help' only means 'free' when you automatically give it the label, especially when you do it on behalf of people who are only too ready to let you.
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  • Profile picture of the author George Wright
    Hi,

    You need to define the word help for them in your emails way before they ask for help. Have a sig automatically inserted in all of your emails.

    "Help with your Internet and PC projects @ very reasonable prices. Need Help? Ask for a FREE quote. If I can't help you I know another Professional who can."

    In that example you nicely contrast free with not free by having a FREE quote on your "help." Also you let them know you are a professional (deserving of pay) by not boasting "Hey I'm a professional," but by referring to other professionals.

    George Wright
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    • Profile picture of the author wassim
      Hello George. Now this is one really good advice. The only thing is that I have to put this at the footer of both my personal and business emails... but still works though. Thanks again.

      Originally Posted by George Wright View Post

      Hi,

      You need to define the word help for them in your emails way before they ask for help. Have a sig automatically inserted in all of your emails.

      "Help with your Internet and PC projects @ very reasonable prices. Need Help? Ask for a FREE quote. If I can't help you I know another Professional who can."

      In that example you nicely contrast free with not free by having a FREE quote on your "help." Also you let them know you are a professional (deserving of pay) by not boasting "Hey I'm a professional," but by referring to other professionals.

      George Wright

      George Wright
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      • Profile picture of the author George Wright
        Hi,

        I had my Coffee now and this came to me.

        I don't know if they have a service like this where you are but here we have a service called, www.Ether.com

        They give you a personal phone number for people to call and before they are connected to you a recording tells them that they will be connected after they agree to pay .99 a minute or $2 a minute, whatever. Or it tells them that they will be connected to you for free for the first 1, 2, or 3 minutes and the charges start after that. It also lets you send emails to them that they can't open unless they pay, whatever you set the payment at.

        Now, When they request "help," say, "Sure, just call me on my 'help' Line." . Or if you send them the email, they pay they open.

        George Wright

        Originally Posted by wassim View Post

        Hello George. Now this is one really good advice. The only thing is that I have to put this at the footer of both my personal and business emails... but still works though. Thanks again.
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  • Profile picture of the author wassim
    Thanks Craig for the tip. The only thing is that people I am talking about don't use these forms to send out emails... they already got my personal one and use it directly... But this could be good for the future too.

    Originally Posted by Craig Desorcy View Post

    Here's a big tip for you.

    Setup a page somewhere that asks for project details, budget, etc..

    When those emails come in, tell them sure! Just go to this link and
    fill out the details. I'll get back to you in a few days.

    Here's an example
    Cool Ryan Services : Cool Ryan - Wordpress Plugin Author - PHP Programmer

    Note the most important part of the form "Estimated Budget"
    Make sure the form is setup so they must fill out all fields.

    Best,

    Craig
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    • Profile picture of the author Dan C. Rinnert
      Do any of these people help you with things for free?

      I do have some online friends that will ask for help, and I may do coding, graphics, whatever for them for free. But, they'll also return the favor when I need something.
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  • Profile picture of the author Matt Bard
    Or you can start a thread like this as a passive aggressive way to address those "friends" reading this

    Just kidding and illustrating a point that I believe they are doing to you when they leave it open for you to interpret.

    Sometimes the asking for "help" forces you to deliver for free or reveal your view or level of the "friendship".

    In my opinion, anyone who would put me in that position in the first place does not deserve the same benefits as a true friend.

    My friends would offer to pay for my services and allow me to decide if I want to make it a gift or not.

    I agree with Craig's post as a way to deal with "all" requests for "help".

    Matt
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