Why Keyword Research Is Better Than Sex

50 replies
I cannot believe I said that but at the moment it is true. It really is.

I have all my websites and affiliate sites all set up for the festive season so I thought I would have a crack at micro niche adsense sites which are going off like gangbusters at the minute.

6 days ago I crank up google adwords keyword tool (GAKT) and start throwing in any old niche and start drilling down. I already have my criteria set out that the keyword phrase has to meet and you go through quite a few before you hit a nugget.

I am sitting here clicking away when my daughter walks in the room and tells her mother that she just bought a popular brand of perfume for herself. Now my family accuse me of turning off when I am on the computer but when my wife asked what brand of perfume, and my daughter told her, my ears stood to attention immediately.

Bang!! I whack my term into GAKT and while the little coloured balls are jiggling across the screen deciding my fate I tell my 18" screen how much I love her and to please be good to me. ( I don't really...)

YES!! She comes back and tells me that 6,600 other people are searching for her exactly every month and that there are numerous people paying money to advertise her assets.

SAFE AT FIRST BASE

I am fairly excited at this stage but have to tell myself to calm down, go reeeeal slow, there is a lot more boxes to tick before we snatch up this little hummer. Right now all I want to do is go hammer and tong at this to find out if I have a winner but I decide to pull back and simply admire my technique so far.

At this stage I invite GAKT's sister to join in the act. Google Search is going to tell me about the competition I have for this little beauty. Once again, I have criteria that have to be met in terms of my competitors. I will only be successful if I am on top. Afterall, top 5 on page 1 is vital.

I JUST STOLE 2 BASES

The competition is quite low. I will not go into figures etc, that is for a different post, but I am delighted so far. High searches and low competition on a term that, especially with xmas coming up, is going to be more popular than the queen of the prom.

Right now I am sweating profusely. I can feel the excitement building up as I am getting closer to utopia. My muscles start to tighten. My keyboard strokes are getting faster and faster with more intent in each one. My only hurdle between climbing Everest or certain doom is the domain name. I have recently come to the conclusion that exact name domains are the way to go. No dashes or hyphens.

Please, don't stop now. I grab one of my favorite tools, ajaxwhois.com, to check availability. For those that don't know this tool tells you if the domain is available as you are typing in your keyword. I begin typing in the 3 word phrase. I am checking .com, .net and .org. The pressure I am feeling is enormous. I am going to explode soon.

Firstly, .com is gone. I sigh but push on relentlessly. Soon I am told that .net is a no-no too. It cannot be happening. All the ground work has been laid. I can't fail now. I refuse to.

STOP RIGHT THERE.. I GOTTA KNOW RIGHT NOW

It all hinges on .org. Whats it gunna be boy. Yes or No, Whats it gunna be boy.
YEEES OR NOOOO

I couldn't take it any longer..... (you know the rest)

YES....YES....YESSSSS (Think Meg Ryan here)

I have done it. It is available. A sense of relief envelops me as I have reached my climactic end of research. I jump wildly up from my chair, pumping the air with my fists and yelling in rapture when it finally hits me.

My wifes feather duster that is. Smack in the back of the scone. She is so over my rantings for the last 10 minutes and had an explosion of her own. I bet the Earth didn't move for her.

I sprint over to godaddy and pick up my beautiful .org and race her back to our cozy little C Panel. While tucking her in to her new home I spoil her rotten. I give her optimsation like you have never seen. I spoil her with the most beautiful .jpg's and I give her a title and description that any search engine would fall in love with.

I introduce her to the world in all her splendor. She is radiant and I stare at her, mesmorised by her beauty and elegance. But will the rest of the world have the same feelings as I?

I go to a few neighbours houses and introduce her. I even dropped her name to people I didn't know. Important people like Mr and Mrs PR7 and above and it worked for within 5 days she makes her debut to the world at #10

I am so proud of her. Such a rapid riser and a hard worker for since debuting 2 days ago she has earnt me $3.85.

Now, I am going down the pub for a beer and brag to my mates about my latest conquest.

PS: After the feather duster incident, keyword research is 100% better than sex
#keyword #research
  • Profile picture of the author Liam Hamer
    I loved reading that Congrats on finding a gold nugget, and I hope you can make some great money from it
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1406908].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author JeffLam
    You, my friend, IS AN AWESOME WRITER!

    Reading your article is 100% better than keyword research.

    I wouldn't stoop so low to say its better than sex though. :p
    Signature
    *********************
    Secret Technique Effortlessly CATAPULTS YOUR Opt-In Rates By: 100%..200%..Even 400% Higher!
    >> Interested? Click to find out more.. <<
    *********************
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1406990].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author jazbo
    Nah, I'm still going with the sex option....
    Signature
    CONTENT WRITER. Reliable, UK-Based, 6 Years Experience - ANY NICHE
    Click Here For Writing Samples & Online Ordering
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407211].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author josspam
    Great attraction title!! It caught my attention... still I don't believe it's better

    Jocy
    Signature
    Celuadictos
    X-Box Peru - Fitbox and Martial Training
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407213].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Big JP
    Conclusion:

    What do keyword research + Sex have in common...?

    They can both make you screem!

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407235].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author josspam
      Originally Posted by Big JP View Post

      Conclusion:

      What do keyword research + Sex have in common...?

      They can both make you screem!

      HAHAHAHA!!! Good one... true... but laugheable!!! xD
      Signature
      Celuadictos
      X-Box Peru - Fitbox and Martial Training
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407257].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author Mmfh
        That was a long post and I read every word. You are a good writer!
        I might have read every word because I feel your excitement and know your cause well. The emotional reward when one finds the golden keyword phrase and climaxes when godaddy has the .com available is really pretty darn cool!

        Better than sex, not sure but its up there!

        Great Post!

        Mm
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407293].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author VanessaB
        I suddenly feel very relaxed and content, but yet energized, compelled by an urge to get up and do things. Doesn't matter what, just do. I think I've felt this way once or twice before, when I was not so 'single'. Perhaps more of this will make up for less of that. Keep this kind of stuff coming Craig, you made my day.

        My computer however, is none to happy with you though. You caused it to wear a coffee stained bloused and now it's embarrassed to be seen with me. There goes my date for tomorrow night.

        Dani
        Signature
        The Recon Report
        Reliable Results, Predictable Profits
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407300].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author Intrepreneur
          Nice going. I had a niche the other day much the same way. I was down the usual ole Barber's shop and in walks another guy I know. He sits down beside me awaiting the buzzz of the hair clipper and the snip snip ofthe scissors. Jst like me.

          Anyways the two of us are sitting there talking and he moves onto the topic of hunting. He had been searching everywhere for a particular type of hunting gear. Obviously my ears pricked up attentively listening to hear more. It's the niche listener, never ending marketing analysis and aways raring for something new to arise.

          One niche uncovered and one more to come. I get called for the bop chop and not 3 minutes into the buzzz buzz and the snip snip. The second niche was cropping up. Oh no I said. all I wanted is to come and have a nice quiet hari cut. I don't wanna be analysisng all this crap every moment of the day.

          But I arrive home with 2 brand new niche's and keywords to chase after. One of them actually very intriguing because the hairdreeser product, although extremely popular wasn't very easy to find. I got that keyword for pennies in adwords so didn't even have to build a site.

          I bet everyone could add their own little story of niche listening?
          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407361].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author GoGetta
    Chris, Great Post, I loved reading that! Haha

    Now I am going to take GAKT out for a date RIGHT NOW, Hope you don't mind sharing! ; )

    GoGetta
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407249].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Vagabond 007
    You must be having the wrong kind of sex then.

    I do agree though, finding a great keyword is exciting. And as already mentioned, great writing. Very entertaining.
    Signature
    The Ultimate Sales & Marketing Mind Map (Just updated - now twice as big!) - scott_krech - "Quite possibly one of the BEST WSO's ever."

    www.UltimateMindMap.com


    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407346].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author KimPup
    Haha, fabulous post!! Read the whole thing....entertaining and educational<<hard to find combo!!
    Signature
    Social Media Exchange
    Sign-up and Get 50 free coins to start your campaign!

    AND...pm me in here and I'll add you as VIP Member for 2 weeks..and add 500 free coins to your account!
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407400].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author sbucciarel
    Banned
    Originally Posted by Craig McPherson View Post

    PS: After the feather duster incident, keyword research is 100% better than sex
    Maybe you should try some new techniques?
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407510].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Fun to Write
    LOL

    Great way to tell you story, dude.
    Signature

    Focus+Smart Work+Persistence=Success

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407573].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Karen Connell
    Originally Posted by Craig McPherson View Post


    STOP RIGHT THERE.. I GOTTA KNOW RIGHT NOW

    It all hinges on .org. Whats it gunna be boy. Yes or No, Whats it gunna be boy.
    YEEES OR NOOOO

    I couldn't take it any longer..... (you know the rest)
    Absolutely great post - had to read it all!

    But...

    I have a complaint.

    I can't stop that darned Meatloaf song from going round and round in my head!

    You are a very talented writer.

    Thanks for the entertainment.

    Karen
    Signature

    Never Mistake Activity for Accomplishment

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407604].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Michael Mayo
    Hi Craig,
    Great story...lol

    I decided to put your theory to the test with the help of my lovely wife.
    Mission: To see if , Keyword Research Is Better Than Sex.

    While In the process of testing your theory with my lovely wife's help she
    called out many keywords. As she did(and with one hand on the keyboard)
    I typed each one into GAKT and the big G respectively.

    Many of the keywords she called out were very religious in nature
    (such as "Oh God!") while others had possibilities and some were hard to
    understand because of the pillow that came between us.

    Anyway, after 30 minutes with no desent results from either of the big G's
    tools I decided to really drill down deeper to see if we could find the really
    deep seeded keywords.

    To make a long story short, after 2 hours of testing we could not find one
    usable keyword. Being exhausted from all the research we decided to just
    lay there and rest a while. Ten minutes had past when we looked at our
    results and tallied them up.

    Our conclusion: "Keyword Research Is Not Better Than Sex."

    We also came to another conclusion: "Keyword Research and Sex don't mix".

    It's hard as hell to type a Keyword into the big G with out double stroking
    and misspelling a word. (That was one of the reasons we had to continue
    testing for a couple of hours)

    To be fare to you, we've decided that we will try this experiment a few
    more times over the weekend to create a proper case study.

    We'll update you on the rest of our results on Monday!

    Have a Great Day!
    Michael
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407672].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Mmfh
      Originally Posted by Michael Mayo View Post

      Hi Craig,
      Great story...lol

      I decided to put your theory to the test with the help of my lovely wife.
      Mission: To see if , Keyword Research Is Better Than Sex.

      While In the process of testing your theory with my lovely wife's help she
      called out many keywords. As she did(and with one hand on the keyboard)
      I typed each one into GAKT and the big G respectively.

      Many of the keywords she called out were very religious in nature
      (such as "Oh God!") while others had possibilities and some were hard to
      understand because of the pillow that came between us.

      Anyway, after 30 minutes with no desent results from either of the big G's
      tools I decided to really drill down deeper to see if we could find the really
      deep seeded keywords.

      To make a long story short, after 2 hours of testing we could not find one
      usable keyword. Being exhausted from all the research we decided to just
      lay there and rest a while. Ten minutes had past when we looked at our
      results and tallied them up.

      Our conclusion: "Keyword Research Is Not Better Than Sex."

      We also came to another conclusion: "Keyword Research and Sex don't mix".

      It's hard as hell to type a Keyword into the big G with out double stroking
      and misspelling a word. (That was one of the reasons we had to continue
      testing for a couple of hours)

      To be fare to you, we've decided that we will try this experiment a few
      more times over the weekend to create a proper case study.

      We'll update you on the rest of our results on Monday!

      Have a Great Day!
      Michael
      Now that's my kind of keyword research!

      I wish my wife would help me with my work the way your wife does!!

      Mm
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1408969].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author Craig McPherson
        As an update, it is 28 hours since I posted this thread and my keyword phrase is now #5, up 5 places from yesterday.

        As I said, I love my .orgy
        Signature
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1413371].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
      [/B]

      Anyway, after 30 minutes with no desent results from either of the big G's
      tools I decided to really drill down deeper to see if we could find the really
      deep seeded keywords.[/QUOTE]

      Now you are getting seedy.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1413390].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author k0zm0zs0ul
      Originally Posted by Michael Mayo View Post

      Hi Craig,
      Great story...lol

      I decided to put your theory to the test with the help of my lovely wife.
      Mission: To see if , Keyword Research Is Better Than Sex.

      While In the process of testing your theory with my lovely wife's help she
      called out many keywords. As she did(and with one hand on the keyboard)
      I typed each one into GAKT and the big G respectively.

      Many of the keywords she called out were very religious in nature
      (such as "Oh God!") while others had possibilities and some were hard to
      understand because of the pillow that came between us.

      Anyway, after 30 minutes with no desent results from either of the big G's
      tools I decided to really drill down deeper to see if we could find the really
      deep seeded keywords.

      To make a long story short, after 2 hours of testing we could not find one
      usable keyword. Being exhausted from all the research we decided to just
      lay there and rest a while. Ten minutes had past when we looked at our
      results and tallied them up.

      Our conclusion: "Keyword Research Is Not Better Than Sex."

      We also came to another conclusion: "Keyword Research and Sex don't mix".

      It's hard as hell to type a Keyword into the big G with out double stroking
      and misspelling a word. (That was one of the reasons we had to continue
      testing for a couple of hours)

      To be fare to you, we've decided that we will try this experiment a few
      more times over the weekend to create a proper case study.

      We'll update you on the rest of our results on Monday!

      Have a Great Day!
      Michael
      LMAO!! Lordy, even funnier Michael! Looking forward to the latest 'results'!
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1415871].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author KateD
    Craig,

    As someone who is skilled at both topics, I found your thread very entertaining. Good way to start off this dreary day.

    Thanks for the smile.

    KateD
    Signature
    Why Aren't You Making Money On Kindle With Erotica?


    --->I can also write other fiction (horror, romance, mystery, etc). Just ask me, I don't bite. :)
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1407756].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Bob Harmon
    Maybe I just don't know what I'm doing...Naked chick will ALWAYS trump Google's colored jiggle balls.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1408869].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Debbie Songster
    Well! That was the best "O" I've had in a long time - LOL

    Thanks for the entertainment

    I'm enjoying John's material too.
    Signature

    Getting back in the grove after taking a year off following a family tragedy.

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1413394].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author paulie888
    Interesting comparison to sex there! I wish it had the same type of connotation for me, but at the moment keyword research for me (even though I know how to do it fairly well) might as well be the same as pulling out a tooth out for me!

    I know the mind is all-powerful, so perhaps I can meditate on your words and convince my subconscious that underneath the staid persona of keyword research does indeed lie some sexiness....lol!

    Paul
    Signature
    >>> Features Jason Fladlien, John S. Rhodes, Justin Brooke, Sean I. Mitchell, Reed Floren and Brad Gosse! <<<
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1413396].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Kevin Regier
    I do like sex a lot but I agree that keyword research is right up there with it.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1413946].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author JayXtreme
    Craig...

    I have to seriously question your previous sexual encounters, if keyword research even comes close. You need to get out more

    Actually, you need to turn the damn machine off.

    Peace

    Jay
    Signature

    Bare Murkage.........

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1414358].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author markfb
    Craig,
    Thanks for cheering up a boring Sunday, Love your style of writing, you really have captured the feelings we all get when stumbling across one of those rare "nuggets".
    Good luck with the org.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1414377].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Ken Leatherman
    Craig,

    Man you just put a big old ear to ear.

    Many of us could learn from your not so subtle writing style and the way you set your 'hook'. You 'forced' us to keep reading with humor and a great story line.

    Each and every paragraph led seamlessly into the next one and you left out just enough information to make us look forward to hearing what else you have to say about your technique.

    However, the feather duster is a bit kinky for me :p , but you may change your mind about sex being 2nd to keyword research if you used it.

    Ken Leatherman

    The Old Geezer
    Signature
    Ghost Writing Services Coming Soon


    So Check Out My WSO
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1414445].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Marhelper
    I am not sure I agree with the ultimate conclusion but that was worth the laugh and good solid info as well ... go get 'em tiger! ('er I mean that in a non sexual way).
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1414452].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author zapp99
    Great tip! I'm gonna apply them tonight and see if I can get some orgasmic results!
    Signature

    Someone pls tell me the logic behind Google ranking my blog at #1 for "stop animal abuse"?

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1414489].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author cosmetic
    Loved It. Keyword research just got better...hahaha
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1415839].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author k0zm0zs0ul
    LMAO!! Loved it! Great story, too funny. And good luck with your better than sex gold nugget!

    Warm regards,
    C
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1415868].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author jessiej
    your a genius!congratulations hope you make gold on what you've found!keep it up
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1415883].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Sophist
      Dude, sounds like you're having boring married people sex. And even though Im an expert keyword researcher and find much pleasure in doing keyword research for myself and others, I think I'll choose exciting single people sex over keyword research anyday
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1440094].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Joel Gray
    Congratulations on finding such a lucrative niche and with the .org available and while I think that you just got caught up in the moment during the keyword research the effort you put in was rewarded. I would also think that you may have written this post during that time also as there is NO WAY that keyword research is better than sex, but I can certainly entertain the thought that during a brief, very brief mental breakdown that was caused by the rush you got when finding that profitable niche and domain you just thought that keyword research was better than sex...but we both know that it is NOT!

    LOL....it is a fantastic post.

    Thanks Joel
    Signature

    "Punish The Deed, Not The Breed"

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1440123].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Tron2k
    you are a very good writer! im sure you will have no problem making money! good luck!
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1440134].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Diana Lane
    Like anything that can give you a buzz, it does pay to be aware of the drawbacks. I'm always mindful of the fact that unprotected keyword research can have consequences, and am careful to use a sturdy firewall. I just wish I could give up the post-keyword research cigarette

    And yes, you are a very good writer. You should have public .org-ies more often
    Signature

    Plot short fiction, long fiction, even outline non-fiction * Edit the question prompts to suit your genre * Easily export text and image files for use with your word processor or Scrivener.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1440277].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Christian Fox
    I prefer to do keyword research while having sex.... But all i hear over and over is oh God oh God.... Maybe I need to get into the Christianity niche?



    Many of the keywords she called out were very religious in nature
    (such as "Oh God!") while others had possibilities and some were hard to
    understand because of the pillow that came between us.
    Oh crap just noticed someone beat me to it....
    Signature

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1440284].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Shana_Adam
      Jeeeeesss how could you be having an affair with GAKT

      The evidence is all there for the world to see, your footprints have been cached and your wife may decide its time for you to choose being GAKT pimp or spending all the revenue on her to make up for it!

      Cyber affairs can be lethal.
      Signature

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1440408].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author jamiedolan
    Any updates on how your site did over the holidays? Thanks for the amusing post.
    Signature
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1564298].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Craig McPherson
      Hi Jamie,

      I am happy with the site although I expected a touch more due it being xmas and the keyword phrase is a popular brand of perfume.

      The site has been going for 45 days now. (debuted on 16th Nov) and it has returned
      $36.64 for an average of 81 cents a day from 16 impressions a day. Impressions and clicks have dropped a lot since 25th Dec which is understandable.

      It is currently sitting #3 on google after being #1 for about 3 weeks.

      This baby was the first of 4 of these types of sites I made and in total they have made
      $128.01 with my best performing site making $59.81 since 24th Nov

      So, if 4 sites average $21 per month each, as is the case here, logic says to pump out more using the same criteria that I used for these four.

      Signature
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1564492].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author Ditso
        I disagree.

        Doing keyword reasearch is NOT better than sex, though it usually lasts longer!
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1564523].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Dennis Gaskill
    Um...Craig old buddy, when was the last time you took a vacation?

    Most people look for organic search results, not orgasmic.
    Signature

    Just when you think you've got it all figured out, someone changes the rules.

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1564434].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Craig McPherson
      Originally Posted by Dennis Gaskill View Post

      Um...Craig old buddy, when was the last time you took a vacation?

      Most people look for organic search results, not orgasmic.
      Hey Dennis,

      That is very, very good mate.
      Thanks for the chuckle.
      Signature
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1564496].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author CMCarlin
    Very entertaining. Thanks for that!
    Signature
    I can help your business grow. Spend less time backlinking and more time focusing on your clients. Skype me anytime for more details. Custom packages available.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[1564450].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Noctilus
    Oh Craig oh Craig

    I couldve just thanked you for that post but I had to say that post had me LOLLLLLLLLL.

    I love the warrior forum but its posts like these which diffuse the tension during a hectic work day that realllly make this forum AWESOME!

    Thanks CRaig
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4352788].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Targeted Traffic
    You are quite an entertaining writer
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4352993].message }}

Trending Topics