Squeeze Page copy Critic

Looks pretty good.

You might want to put a call to action under the bullets.

You might also use some scarcity. If you're only going to give out 5,000 copies, put that on there to create some urgency.

BTW... you might already know this, but conversions are going to be much lower with PPC traffic in general, compared to traffic like JV traffic.

What matters most is how much you're willing to pay per lead.

Right now you could be killing it with a 15% conversion rate, but I don't know because I have no idea how much you're paying for those clicks.

I have no idea what level of marketer you are... you might know all this stuff... just thought I'd give some insights anyway since you asked for help.

Well there are some grammatical and syntax errors in there and it sounds a little hypey...

You might posting on the Copywriting Board but make sure you read the sticky about asking for critiques first!

Or, you know, you could just hire me to write your sales and landing pages for you. I do have a WSO running right now.... (okay, blatant self promotion is over now)

Honestly--if you're looking for help with writing and conversions, the Copywriting Board is a good place to post something like this.

My two cents:
Corrected some grammatical errors and changed the copy a bit. I'm not copy writer by the way so seek competent copy writing advice from a licensed copy writer in the state of Mississippi :-)

The Exact Two Landing Pages That Earn Me Over $2,500 Daily


Download the same landing pages which are making me money online 24/7 with PPC, SEO & Facebook (On June 2th, 2010 I made $2730).


These landing pages are cash cows and you will definitely see a higher conversion rate when you use them for your own campaigns.


Why should you MUST have these two landing pages?

* They have been carefully optimized by my team over the last year after lots of testing.

* They have constantly outperformed other landing pages in several niches. We have spent several thousands of $$$ of our own money testing them.

* Our tests have shown that these landing pages convert consistenly between 7% and 8% every single time.

* It is very easy to change the text and images using any html editor for the landing pages and even my 7 year old nephew was able to make the changes. No child labor laws were broken ,mind you.

* The landing pages are designed to gain trust, which leads to higher conversion rates.

Grammar and snytax doesn't really make a difference...

Because average people read at an 8th grade level.

I guarantee it'll have no effect whatsoever conversion-wise if you fix it.

Just something to think about.

thanks guys for the great help.

I'd be able to forgive one grammar error as a customer, but after that I'd leave the site if there are more. Makes me feel like I'm dealing with a scammer or an idiot. No offense intended. At the same time, I may not be in the market you're trying to sell to and I may not represent a significant market share. I'm just saying that lots of people with money who work in the corporate world or went to university will notice it, even if the majority of the population reads at an 8th grade level.

I agree you should only write at an 8th grade level, just try to be clear on who your market is and if grammar and spelling matter to them.