critique my first landing page

Hi, love the niche you're in

Your copy though needs a little work. I'm by no means an expert, but I'm studying copywriting at the moment and I suggest you do the same.
Check out websites such as copyblogger.com or michelfortin.com
Have a look at the copywriting section of this forum it has some great resources. You can't write the best copy at your first attempt and that's okay. You have to deal with trial and error just like with picking up women you fail at your first attempt but with practice you'll become great at it at some point.

Anyway.. my suggestion is this... Start of emphasizing your prospects problem.
Don't be afraid to share your story. How you used to struggle for years, really address the problem, tell your prospect about the challenges you used to face, how your failure made you feel. Really emphasize their problem.
Tell them the benefits of being great with women and what happens if they don't take up on your offer. Write in a tone as if you were speaking to your friend. Show proof (testimonials) Have a call to action.

Also, great copy should address every objection your prospect might have...
I've read this great article about how to turn around objections..check it out:
http://www.michelfortin.com/ways-turn/

Try not to sound like a commercial! "never again this...never again that"...this sort of writing puts me off very much!

Also your copy is very confusing...who is your prospect?
The guy who already had a few bad dates or the guy who has never been on a date before? Your copy is full of everything... how is your prospect ever going to relate to that?

THINK LIKE YOUR PROSPECT! Try to put yourself in his shoes.

You must understand the situation according to your prospects point of view. What's in it for them? What are their benefits? Answer their objections, say what they want to hear.

Also, your headline needs improvement...

"Here's how to date any woman you want.. Guaranteed!" would be better. I have much better headlines, but I can't reveal them all as you're my competition. (I'm in the same niche..sorry)

The Bonus packages don't match. A guy who doesn't even know what to say to a woman, won't likely be giving a woman oral sex as he hasn't even come past the stage of rejection.

For example: "Here's how to talk to women (on dates)" would be much better.
"Here's how to go from A to Z with a woman (from hello to sleeping with her)" These would make better bonus packages.

And start capturing your prospects data so you can follow up with them. People most likely won't buy at their first visit.