Big Writing Mistake Many of You Marketers Are Making

[TiffanyDow]

I see a lot of writing mistakes and I always dissect them from a marketing standpoint, so I want to help you out here:

Stop empathizing with negative sentence starters! And I'm not talking about sales copy - I'm talking about articles, blog posts, and INSIDE of the eBook they just bought.

Let me 'splain.

Look at these real sentences I've seen in an eBook or blog post:

Sure, you may hate writing sales copy, but you can master it if you have the right mentor!

You might be intimidated by paying for clicks and worried about losing too much money, but with my guidance, you will see a handsome profit using Google PPC Marketing.

Even if you don't have a good voice, you can join the ranks of those who do live talk radio shows on the net using this easy tutorial below.

Look at what's in bold. It's all plagued with self doubt, insults, and negativity. Hell, they may not have even THOUGHT about having a nasaly voice or considered the fact that sales copy might be hard until you said it!

Look at it once I use my handy dandy Tiffinator Machine on it:

You can master sales copy if you have the right mentor!

With my guidance, you will see a handsome profit using Google PPC Marketing.

You can join the ranks of those who do live talk radio shows on the net using this easy tutorial.

How refreshingly positive that is! No negativity or doubt floating around. I know many of you do it because you're trying to empathize with your reader - letting them know that you know what they're feeling, but this is the wrong way.

If you're selling a how to guide and being a leader, a mentor to these people, then they want - no, they NEED - you to be inspiring, motivational, and encouraging to them. Don't introduce them to anything that might harm their success (such as negative feelings they may not have even considered) because then guess who they're going to blame when they get paralyzed and can't move forward?

YOU!

tiff

[aleisterone]

As you would know..the most important thing is to grab attention and relate...that`s what the first example does, so I think it`s ok. Even better than yours. Cheers, and thanks for sharing!

[Sean Donahoe]

You raise some very good points. I have to keep telling some of my clients the same thing. Everyone seems to be full of self doubt instead of glowing confidence. It's a shame as a positive spin saying the same thing can achieve much greater results.

[TiffanyDow]

Originally Posted by aleisterone

As you would know..the most important thing is to grab attention and relate...that`s what the first example does, so I think it`s ok. Even better than yours. Cheers, and thanks for sharing!

So you disagree?

[Steven Wagenheim]

Depends on your target market and how good a writer you are.

My resource boxes always start with...

"Are you sick and tired of"

or

"Are you fed up with"

And I think you know how profitable my article marketing is.

It's not quite as cut and dried as you'd have us believe. Of course in the
hands of a hack, the negative connotations will pretty much kill any
chances you have of closing the sale, but in the hands of a proficient
master, it can be very effective.

Bottom line: If you don't think you can pull off the "negative" angle, go
with Tiff's suggestions.

Split test to find out what works better for you.

Just my 2 cents on the subject.

[debra]

Originally Posted by TiffanyDow

I see a lot of writing mistakes and I always dissect them from a marketing standpoint, so I want to help you out here:

Stop empathizing with negative sentence starters!

Let me 'splain.

Look at these sentences:

Sure, you may hate writing sales copy, but you can master it if you have the right mentor!

You might be intimidated by paying for clicks and worried about losing too much money, but with my guidance, you will see a handsome profit using Google PPC Marketing.

Even if you don't have a good voice, you can join the ranks of those who do live talk radio shows on the net using this easy tutorial.

Look at what's in bold. It's all plagued with self doubt, insults, and negativity. Hell, they may not have even THOUGHT about having a nasaly voice or considered the fact that sales copy might be hard until you said it!

Look at it once I use my handy dandy Tiffinator Machine on it:

You can master sales copy if you have the right mentor!

With my guidance, you will see a handsome profit using Google PPC Marketing.

You can join the ranks of those who do live talk radio shows on the net using this easy tutorial.

How refreshingly positive that is! No negativity or doubt floating around. I know many of you do it because you're trying to empathize with your reader - letting them know that you know what they're feeling, but this is the wrong way.

If you're selling a how to guide and being a leader, a mentor to these people, then they want - no, they NEED - you to be inspiring, motivational, and encouraging to them. Don't introduce them to anything that might harm their success (such as negative feelings they may not have even considered) because then guess who they're going to blame when they get paralyzed and can't move forward?

YOU!

tiff

You know, I haven't actually thought about it in context like that.

And...Your Right!

I stepped back to read each comment and paid attention to my own reaction to the statements.

I don't like it when you start out on a negetive tone. It feels like you are handing me unsolicited pitty. I don't like to be talked down to and I suspect that others could feel the same.

[TiffanyDow]

If your whole intention is to target frustrated, fed up people, then a completely negative-spin with an ending of a solution is one form of marketing, yes.

That's not what I'm talking about.

I'm talking about marketers who are not using the "are you fed up" angle - just trying to inform, motivate and become a mentor to people looking to learn. Two different audiences.

IE: a Newbie marketer who knows nothing about making a Squidoo lens comes to my blog and reads, "I know you don't have time to make a Squidoo lens, but you can make money blah blah blah"

versus:

"Making a Squidoo lens is quick and easy and can provide a great ROI of the time you spend perfecting your lensmaster skills!"

I've still met the "arguments" the people who've worried about the time are thinking, BUT I've also left out the introduction of that concern to people who may not have even considered it.
tiff

[Jkeown]

Hey good post Tiff thanks for that.

I mostly agree but have to shamefully admit that the negative headlines you used as examples did more for me than the positive ones!

When I read something like:

"Even if you don't have a good voice, you can join the ranks of those who do live talk radio shows on the net using this easy tutorial."

versus

"You can join the ranks of those who do live talk radio shows on the net using this easy tutorial."

I tend to pay more attention to the first one. I think it's probably because it addresses an issue MOST buyers are going to have, and because it gives the impression it's something different. Chances are they've tried a few guides and found they didn't work and their voice still wasn't good enough etc, but with that headline it appears this product has an innovative solution and a way around that issue.

Similarly, the headline about PPC was better the first time (just for me!) simple because it offers more interest and makes me believe it's something special, even though it could be a run of the mill PPC product. The headline made me feel like you were going to address the issues of losing money and ensure that it wasn't going to happen to me.

Also,

I think fear sells. I personally don't use it often at all. But when I started out I leant towards buying things that made me subconciously feel like I would fail if I didn't buy the product. Things like

"PPC is a DANGEROUS GAME, without this detailed road map, your PPC venture will see you lose thousands"

Are effective to a newbie market. I don't find this tactic particularly honourable or heart-warming but it seems to work! I also understand we're not all targeting a newbie market so maybe this point is wasted completely but I just wanted to throw that in anyway.

ANYWAY

On the whole I do a gree Tiffany. I particularly dislike headlines that insult or demean the customers in any way, and think they should be cut out. And it's usually better to give the reader a good impression of the business they're about to buy into, whatever it may be.

[Steven Wagenheim]

Originally Posted by TiffanyDow

If your whole intention is to target frustrated, fed up people, then a completely negative-spin with an ending of a solution is one form of marketing, yes.

That's not what I'm talking about.

I'm talking about marketers who are not using the "are you fed up" angle - just trying to inform, motivate and become a mentor to people looking to learn. Two different audiences.

IE: a Newbie marketer who knows nothing about making a Squidoo lens comes to my blog and reads, "I know you don't have time to make a Squidoo lens, but you can make money blah blah blah"

versus:

"Making a Squidoo lens is quick and easy and can provide a great ROI of the time you spend perfecting your lensmaster skills!"

I've still met the "arguments" the people who've worried about the time are thinking, BUT I've also left out the introduction of that concern to people who may not have even considered it.
tiff

Thanks Tiff, missed your point...obviously.

You're right. If you're trying to introduce people to the joys of creating a
Squidoo lens, you don't start out with, "Look, I know putting these modules
together is a bitch, but with my great guide..."

Yeah, wrong tact.

What you CAN do however is this.

"Look, if you're fed up with not getting anywhere with your marketing, my
guide to Squidoo will have you creating money manufacturing lenses in
the time it takes to make your morning coffee."

Much better.

[TiffanyDow]

I'm not talking sales copy though - I'm talking regular content like inside the eBook or on a blog post or article. Not headlines for sales copy

They've bought. Now they're looking to you for the answers and you're drilling the negatives into their head. Sorry for the confusion about where it is I'm talking about

Couldn't you read my mind? LOL
tiff

[TiffanyDow]

Right Steve - you got what I mean now. Maybe my next writing tip should be, "How to convey your thoughts so people aren't forced to read minds."
lol

[Steven Wagenheim]

Originally Posted by TiffanyDow

Right Steve - you got what I mean now. Maybe my next writing tip should be, "How to convey your thoughts so people aren't forced to read minds."
lol

Ah, ebook content...oh brother. Don't read any of MY ebooks

I drive many points home from a negative angle because I need people to
understand that making these mistakes can land them in the poor house.

Or maybe that's not what you're talking about either.

Know what? I'll just keep writing like I do...it seems to work for me.

[Jkeown]

Oh!

late night + hangover + attempt at thoughtful post = looking like a complete idiot.

I see, inside the content is a whole differnet kettle of fish indeed. Once they've bought the product you're right, they shouldn't ever feel negative vibes, only inspiration and confidence, which the examples you gave definately included!

Cheers!

[DaveDunn]

Hi Tiffany

I see what you are saying, but surely some of those negative thoughts are how you get people interested in the product. By playing on their emotions. People buy on emotion, not always because they actually need something.

Of course it depends on the market.

Dave

[TiffanyDow]

Originally Posted by DaveDunn

Hi Tiffany

I see what you are saying, but surely some of those negative thoughts are how you get people interested in the product. By playing on their emotions. People buy on emotion, not always because they actually need something.

Of course it depends on the market.

Dave

Hi Dave!

yeah I'm going to go in and edit the top - in a later post i explained that it's not sales copy I'm talking about - so the interest is solved.
tiff

[Scott Woodside]

I will take anything to the bank that Tiffany says! I love you Tiffany! It's always refreshing hearing from a professional! Merry Christmas.

[aleisterone]

Yeah, you should have made it clear that you`re not referring to the sales copy. In the actual content I tend to use exciting and positive words.

[Raydal]

How you structure your sentences all depends on your audience. I see
that you have already clarified that you are not refering to copywriting
but I want to show how this applies to copywriting.

Most people are familiar with the tried and true A.I.D.A. formula for
writing copy. What most don't realize is that how you get attention
from your target depends on your readers opinion of your product.

Are they uninformed? favorable? opposed? or apathetic towards your
product or service? Your answer to this question will determine HOW
you get their attention.

For example if the reader is opposed to your product (say using blackhat
methods to get traffic) then you'll get their attention by emphasizing
a common ground you hold with them. In other words you'll AGREE that
blackhat is the 'less than ideal way to go'. Hence, you must be negative.

You'll have to emphasize points of agreement which may mean 'starting
with a negative idea'.

Now if your product is new to your readers then to get attention you'll
have to focus on the basic elements of the problem your product
solves and clarify possible misunderstandings (educate them.)

The bottom line is that you can't always use "positive" statements for
this will only reach the "favorable" section of your potential market.

Still a great topic for discussion though.

-Ray L.,

[Loren Woirhaye]

This IS a good topic of discussion. Starting a sentence with
a negative frame and then writing "BUT" is mostly just poor
communication. It's an over-used construction which bloats
sentences and fiddle-faddles around making a real argument.

Sometimes we start a sentence with a positive frame and then
we qualify it with "if" - also over-used but "ifs" and "buts" are
actually fairly conversational. You won't find the best writers
in print using such muddy English too often. Online with marketing
content we do make some concessions to get the material
outand producing traffic or sales or test results or Google
ranking.

Writing clear, communicative prose is challenging to say the
least. There is always a lot of room for improvement in my
own so I like to read these sorts of things and be reminded.

[Steven Wagenheim]

Originally Posted by Loren Woirhaye

This IS a good topic of discussion. Starting a sentence with
a negative frame and then writing "BUT" is mostly just poor
communication. It's an over-used construction which bloats
sentences and fiddle-faddles around making a real argument.

Sometimes we start a sentence with a positive frame and then
we qualify it with "if" - also over-used but "ifs" and "buts" are
actually fairly conversational. You won't find the best writers
in print using such muddy English too often. Online with marketing
content we do make some concessions to get the material
outand producing traffic or sales or test results or Google
ranking.

Writing clear, communicative prose is challenging to say the
least. There is always a lot of room for improvement in my
own so I like to read these sorts of things and be reminded.

Loren, chatty prose has its place, and if you're good at it (I like to
think I am) you can really suck your readers in.

All I know is it DOES work for me BUT may not work for everybody.

[Loren Woirhaye]

Yeah, of course it does BUT I gotta justify my degree
in English Lit. somehow.

[Steven Wagenheim]

Originally Posted by Loren Woirhaye

Yeah, of course it does BUT I gotta justify my degree
in English Lit. somehow.

Ah yes, English lit. Had plenty of that stuff in college.

Why do you think I became a writer in the first place?

That, and hanging out in clubs. (don't ask )