I need an intern

Bill Farnham

13 years ago

This space reserved to warn potential wanna-be interns that I might make a better boss..

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BloggingPro

13 years ago

Is there a review copy available?

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Ross Dalangin 13 years ago

Originally Posted by BloggingPro

Is there a review copy available?

Wow, no offense but this post make me laugh out loud. Are you serious, I guess not
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- BloggingPro 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Ross Dalangin
  
  Wow, no offense but this post make me laugh out loud. Are you serious, I guess not
  
  Oh don't get me wrong. I was deadly serious! Deadly!
  
  Hell I'm still waiting. I don't get paid till Friday and really wanna "check out this internship!"
  
  ...I'm here all week! :p
  
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Eduard Stinga

13 years ago

Originally Posted by Ross Dalangin

Originally Posted by BloggingPro

Is there a review copy available?

Wow, no offense but this post make me laugh out loud. Are you serious, I guess not

I second that, the funniest thing in the whole thread!

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tpw 13 years ago

Originally Posted by EduardS

I second that, the funniest thing in the whole thread!

BloggingPro is truly one of the funniest people in the forum.
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SocialMediaOwls

13 years ago

yeah, don't we all need this...

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Matthew Shane Roe

13 years ago

Originally Posted by Kurt

Your compensation:

The privilege of me telling you what to do. I promise that I won't give you tasks that won't benefit me. Because of this, you will learn the essentials of IM and become a generally better person just from the mere association you'll have with me.

hw mch do me get paid?? will work for $0.50 evey hour.

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Joe118 13 years ago

I've tried and Kurt is an awesome boss. He is so so fun to work for, even creeps up to you and screams BOOM BOOM BOOM in your ears without any warning.

How much more fun do you want than that?!

--Joe
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Julie McElroy

13 years ago

Are you flexible on the 24 hour availability? I mean I do need SOME beauty sleep! I can write 236 articles for only $0.0023 a word too!!

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Joe118 13 years ago

Originally Posted by Julie McElroy

Are you flexible on the 24 hour availability? I mean I do need SOME beauty sleep! I can write 236 articles for only $0.0023 a word too!!

You don't need any more sleep if thats a pic of you
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hardraysnight

13 years ago

i would apply but i am not an expert, unlike so many others

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tpw

13 years ago

Now, Kurt is offering an awesome deal there, but I will do one better.

If you are a guy, I will share my sheep with you if you choose to work with me instead.

If you are lady, I will have my oldest boy call you every day to tell you how "ROASTING HOT" you are.

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WebPen

13 years ago

Originally Posted by tpw

Now, Kurt is offering an awesome deal there, but I will do one better.

If you are a guy, I will share my sheep with you if you choose to work with me instead.

If you are lady, I will have my oldest boy call you every day to tell you how "ROASTING HOT" you are.

Sheep? Really?

Goats are so much better.

I mean, unless you're a BBW kinda guy.

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tpw 13 years ago

Originally Posted by AYoungMillionaire

Sheep? Really?

Goats are so much better.

I mean, unless you're a BBW kinda guy.

I am from Oklahoma.

Here, sheep are a favorite pastime -- better than porn... Unless it is sheep porn... :p
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- WebPen 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by tpw
  
  I am from Oklahoma.
  
  Here, sheep are a favorite pastime -- better than porn... Unless it is sheep porn... :p
  
  Well being from Georgia, all I can say is- ew.
  
  Especially if you have a hot sister!
  
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  tpw 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by AYoungMillionaire
  
  Well being from Georgia, all I can say is- ew.
  
  Especially if you have a hot sister!
  
  Like I said... I am from Oklahoma...
  
  Most of us don't have hot sisters...
  
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theory expert

Banned 13 years ago

Originally Posted by Kurt

you will learn the essentials of IM and become a generally better person just from the mere association you'll have with me.

See I been trying to tell people the same thing for decades. The mere presence of asking for my assistance puts you ions farther than your peers. Likewise being in the same forum as me is a gift. This is fact, like gravity, physics, and....

See illustration below:

This is my last pupil.... Washing my clothes with a smile. I work wonders don't I ?

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BloggingPro

13 years ago

So I guess that's a NO on the review package then huh? Damn... I wanted to review this so I could promote my sig!

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dcristo

13 years ago

These type of job offers always make me cringe. Slave labor at its finest. Not only do you want a slave, you want someone to work your schedule. If your **** smelled better then the next person to make it worthwhile for the intern, you'd be able to afford outsourcing. Just sayin.

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BloggingPro

13 years ago

Originally Posted by dcristo

These type of job offers always make me cringe. Slave labor at its finest. Not only do you want a slave, you want someone to work your schedule. Good luck finding a monkey, because thats what you are looking for.

I could be wrong, but I do believe this link could help you understand whats going on here.

Joke - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

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tpw

13 years ago

Originally Posted by dcristo

These type of job offers always make me cringe. Slave labor at its finest. Not only do you want a slave, you want someone to work your schedule. Good luck finding a monkey, because thats what you are looking for.

Finding monkeys is easy...

And finding people in this forum, who always seem to miss the point, is always easier... :rolleyes:

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Richard Van

13 years ago

Originally Posted by dcristo

These type of job offers always make me cringe. Slave labor at its finest. Not only do you want a slave, you want someone to work your schedule. If your **** smelled better then the next person to make it worthwhile for the intern, you'd be able to afford outsourcing. Just sayin.

Well at least you can say you won something today.

What really makes me laugh is I bet Kurt's had at least 50 "When can I start" PM's already.

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dcristo

13 years ago

Fair enough if its a joke. But I have seen this type of intern jobs in job classifieds.

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tpw 13 years ago

Originally Posted by dcristo

Fair enough if its a joke. But I have seen this type of intern jobs in job classifieds.

Yes, and the OP was making fun of people who do things like that. :p
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dcristo

13 years ago

Ok ok, the joke is on me now. The "Be on-call 24 hours a day" bit put me over the edge.

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tpw 13 years ago

Originally Posted by dcristo

Ok ok, the joke is on me now. The "Be on-call 24 hours a day" bit put me over the edge.

I have actually had customers in the past, who believed I should be on-call 24 hours a day, because they paid me a few bucks.

My response to 3am phone calls = Refund. Block.
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Matthew Shelton

13 years ago

Here's a dumb call-for-an-intern story

- one time I replied to a call for an intern (a serious one) and got mixed up between Brad Fallon and Brad Callen in my response email

- the Brad involved didn't take too kindly to my mistake and so that knocked me out of the running right there!

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richgrad

13 years ago

Thanks for reminding me to reply the guy who wanted me to teach him everything I know for free that he can learn by being my intern =)

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schttrj 13 years ago

Just curious...

What would anyone gain from this internship? He's working for free, after all.
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- Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by schttrj
  
  Just curious...
  
  What would anyone gain from this internship? He's working for free, after all.
  
  Post #18 above may help you (and various other Warriors who like to reply without reading threads first) to understand, Ron. :rolleyes:
  
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  schttrj 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Alexa Smith
  
  Post #18 above may help you (and various other Warriors who like to reply without reading threads first) to understand, Ron. :rolleyes:
  
  Ha ha...I seriously missed it! Thanks.
  
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- tpw 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by schttrj
  
  Just curious...
  
  What would anyone gain from this internship? He's working for free, after all.
  
  They greatest rewards in life will not always come in the form of dollar bills.
  
  For example, when my kids reward me, no dollar bills are involved.
  
  And more so, when my wife rewards me, only smiles are included.
  
  Thanks
  
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  Bill Platt, Oklahoma USA, PlattPublishing.com
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Andyhenry

13 years ago

Hey Kurt,

I might take you up on this

I've been wondering how to get more access to your brain.

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nothing to see here.

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jcruz

13 years ago

Thanks thats about 30 seconds of my life that i will never get back.

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tpw 13 years ago

Originally Posted by jcruz

Thanks thats about 30 seconds of my life that i will never get back.

You are welcome. :p

Glad I could be of some help.
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pjCheviot

Banned 13 years ago

Thanks

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jcruz

13 years ago

I think i found a couple of guys for you, cream of the crop, but they drive a hard bargain.

YouTube - ‪Worst Job Interviews EVER very...

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AnniePot 13 years ago

What a gem. The best laugh in weeks (for me anyway ). Thanks!!!
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kPybus

13 years ago

I actually have an intern to do most of my repetive boring work. In exchange he gets experience and a lifetime of knowledge. It's working well for everyone involved.

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sweetloleypop

13 years ago

Nice to heart that sir, i am interested even without pay just to learn.You can message me if ever i caught your attention.

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pjCheviot Banned 13 years ago

Originally Posted by sweetloleypop

Nice to heart that sir, i am interested even without pay just to learn.You can message me if ever i caught your attention.

Do you want a reference? - I can put in a good word for you
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- notrichyet 13 years ago
  
  A quote by Albert Einstein:
  
  Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
  
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JamesGw

13 years ago

I'm going to be honest: This deal is hard to pass up.

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Kurt

13 years ago

To those that are "upset" over my OP...

Yes, it's a joke. But there are also a couple of real points you should take away:

Asking someone to mentor you for free is just as unrealistic as me wanting someone to do all my crap work for free. And I've seen a lot more threads asking for free mentors over the years than I've seen threads asking for free interns.

Most importantly, if you really want a mentor, don't ask what the mentor will do for you, tell us what you will do for your mentor.

Obviously I don't expect anyone to work under the conditions I posted in my OP...But if you really want some help, offer something of value instead of just asking for something of value...Something like, "I'll do this and this and this for you if you can help me learn a little bit." I'll bet you'll get much better results, plus some respect from potential mentors.

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Bill Farnham

13 years ago

Originally Posted by Kurt

To those that are "upset" over my OP...

Yes, it's a joke. But there are also a couple of real points you should take away:

Kurt,

The responses speak volumes about some people's ability to comprehend things on the internet.

Perhaps I'm just old, but the point of your OP was crystal clear to me despite my off-handed response.

This problem also carries over to things like 'sales copy'. Just be glad this wan't a WSO you started...

~Bill

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pjCheviot Banned 13 years ago

Originally Posted by Bill Farnham

Kurt,

The responses speak volumes about some people's ability to comprehend things on the internet.

Perhaps I'm just old, . . . . .

Got to agree, KJ (not about you being old but ..... )

And also, Kurt - I already have five people lined up for interviews with you
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Kurt

13 years ago

Originally Posted by Bill Farnham

Kurt,

The responses speak volumes about some people's ability to comprehend things on the internet.

Perhaps I'm just old, but the point of your OP was crystal clear to me despite my off-handed response.

This problem also carries over to things like 'sales copy'. Just be glad this wan't a WSO you started...

~Bill

Hey Bill...

I agree you're old and my reaction to your first post was: C'mon man! It's ME we're talking about...

Seriously, there are some cultures that don't really understand sarcasm and tend to take things literally. Those folks can be excused for not getting the joke...But the native English speakers are another story.

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Robert Puddy

13 years ago

Originally Posted by Kurt

To those that are "upset" over my OP...

Yes, it's a joke. But there are also a couple of real points you should take away:

Asking someone to mentor you for free is just as unrealistic as me wanting someone to do all my crap work for free. And I've seen a lot more threads asking for free mentors over the years than I've seen threads asking for free interns.

Most importantly, if you really want a mentor, don't ask what the mentor will do for you, tell us what you will do for your mentor.

Obviously I don't expect anyone to work under the conditions I posted in my OP...But if you really want some help, offer something of value instead of just asking for something of value...Something like, "I'll do this and this and this for you if you can help me learn a little bit." I'll bet you'll get much better results, plus some respect from potential mentors.

when i first started online i would have jumped at that deal from someone i knew could put me straight, and more to the point could introduce me to their teams and contacts.

the 24 hours a day might be stretching it but still for someone with some gumption it might actually benefit them