How Bad Is My Squeeze Page?

[vesonexavier]

Hey Guys,

I just updated my squeeze page and I made my first attempt of making a video and putting it on my page and on youtube. I was wondering if you guys could check out my page and tell me what's wrong with it. I'm sure there's something wrong because it's my first attempt at getting on camera and explaining my business opportunity.

Thanks for your help guys.

[Carlsbadd]

The video is very hard to hear and the angle of the camera made me turn it off after 2 minutes.
The page should be a little more about the product itself and so should the video.
You go right into talking about the business and nothing about the product really.

You must build product value first and the business opportunity second, your viewers have to want the product to stay interested.

[Chris_Willow]

You sure need to do a little more production work. Creating videos that sell is not easy despite the fact many internet marketers try to tell you the opposite...
If you'd like, i can pimp your video for free in exchange for a testimonial

Chris

[vesonexavier]

Awesome thanks for telling me the truth, I was told to try and do it without a written script so that it doesn't sound rehearsed. I'm working on revising the videos right now, after reviewing the videos again you're right, I'm promoting the business more than I'm promoting the product. I have to get people excited about the product before they can get excited about the business opportunity. That makes an incredible amount of sense but again I tried it without a script I might just have to write some "topics" I'm going to cover while the video is recording to make it sound better. Thanks again for the advice.
And I'll change video angle too.

[Zeus66]

Just a little proofreading help...

It's "Paradigm" - not "Paradign." You want to make a professional impression, and misspellings can hurt an otherwise solid campaign. Good luck with it!

John

[Stanley Tang]

Not bad for a first attempt. Like they said, change the video (it looks too "narrow") and also it's waaayyyy too long. I don't think anybody has the attention span to sit down for 7 minutes. Something like 2 to 3 minutes will be better.

I don't know much about the product (unless I watch the 7 minute informercial). I feel you need bullet points. What are the features and benefits of your product?

Something like "I hate SPAM... your info will not be sold, rented etc" right below the optin box will help too. And also your name. Some graphics to make it a more professional look won't hurt either (although some copywriters will say graphics decrease the conversion rate)

[Carlsbadd]

I do a lot of sales person to person but the logic is the same. There is a method I use that is pretty universal to selling so here are some tips and what and why many people do things this way.

1 Warm up: Tell a little about yourself, be friendly and casual
2 Story: Tell them your story ,who you are and what made you interested in what you do
3 Company Story: Why the company you represent is so totally awesome, who the founders are and why you felt compelled to work for them
4: Present problem: make them fell the pain
5: present solution
6:Trail Close: This is hard on a video since you are not one on one but ask the viewer a few questions example, "Would you agree or disagree that if you were able to use this (insert product here) it would improve your (insert problem here)

It's harder on video since you can't get responses but you are leading the viewer down a path to purchase your product without them knowing, read some books on the psychology of selling and you will see it hasn't really changed in 100 years

[Marian Berghes]

i got a couple of advices:
1.make the video louder...i can barley hear you
2.talk about the product more, make ppl have more interest in your product
3.its too long, make it shorter and more to the point
4.change the camera angle...make it equal to your face instead of down.

[Frank Murphy]

I think you need to place your opt-in box above and video below. And add a few compelling words to make people want to sign up. Just my 2 cents

[lakshaybehl]

Squeeze pages need to be more personal.... and there are some flaws in the videos that others have mentioned.


But the BIGGEST MISTAKE IS...

Your video was placed at a place where it was easil distracting me from the headline so I missed the headline and then the vid didn't even play automatically. A person would rather click on "close" instead of "Play".

-Lakshay

(If you need more help, PM me and we'll see)

[vesonexavier]

Thanks again for the help guys, with this being my first crack at doing this video marketing I knew I would have alot to work on. Marketing the "product" makes a lot of sense yet I barely did that, so in my revision I'm definitely going to do that.

Another thing that came off during the video was that I really don't have an internet marketing story. I'm new to this industry and I don't have the huge success story, that most people have. Most people aren't going to join someone who's a rookie to the industry. I'm not sure how create a story for myself that would interest someone enough to go into business with me.

[Marian Berghes]

a good thing to do will be to put some stuff below the headline...like 10 rows or a bit more...then at the end put something big,a graphics or red bolded text, like "Watch the video below for more info" or something similar...and another thing most ppl don't like auto-play videos...cus it makes the customer forget every thing else and concentrate just on the video...so if you want that you should have a V GOOD video, or second they just close the page after 30 secs or so because they don't like the video is on auto play and this bothers them

[Mike Montgomery]

I think it's pretty darn good myself.

The only thing I would change is to put your optin
above the fold, maybe right above the video.

[Carlsbadd]

Most people aren't going to join someone who's a rookie to the industry. I'm not sure how create a story for myself that would interest someone enough to go into business with me.

Your viewers don't need to know you are new to the industry, just tell a compelling story, or you could even turn that to your advantage like:

Folks, I was delivering pizza one day and one of my regular customers handed me a card with a website on it, I looked ot over and was BLOWN AWAY by the potential of this product. blah , blah, blah

Like I said tell YOUR STORY have it hold enough truth to not make it seem like you are full of BS

[BrianMcLeod]

I don't think it's "bad" at all. If you've done this yourself, you've done well!

HOWEVER, and don't take this wrong way, your intro in the video is killing the thing... The company video is much, much stickier.

I would test a version using your photo in the copy and only the company provided video... In other words, lose the personal video introduction, let the company's well produced video sell at the head then introduce yourself via the copy and photo underneath when you ask for the visitors details.

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[vesonexavier]

Thanks LoudMac that's an excellent idea I think I'm going to do that and see how that works out, I guess I thought I HAD to put my face on video which I'm sure I still have to do at some point but the company video is much more interesting than I am. I was thinking of maybe revising the videos on youtube so people COULD still see my face and then go to my squeeze page here?

[Peter Bestel]

Originally Posted by vesonexavier

Hey Guys,

I just updated my squeeze page and I made my first attempt of making a video and putting it on my page and on youtube. I was wondering if you guys could check out my page and tell me what's wrong with it. I'm sure there's something wrong because it's my first attempt at getting on camera and explaining my business opportunity.

Thanks for your help guys.

Forgive me if I don't comment on your page - I can't really add too much to what's already been said.

What I'd like to do is comment on the way you've asked for feedback:

How bad is My Squeeze Page?

tell me what's wrong with it

I'm sure there's something wrong because it's my first attempt

Now, I know you want some criticism, but you're leading people to give negative comments before you start. Before they look at it they'll be telling themselves, "Oh, I've got to find out what's wrong with this guy's squeeze page." If there's anything good about it, they might not tell you.

You're not only leading your questions, if you keep talking like that you'll convince yourself that it's crap. Don't be too hard on yourself.

I'd suggest asking questions in a more neutral way, you're more likely to get a balanced range of answers that way.

Just a thought.

Peter