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Please Give Me a Metaphor that Explains Internet Marketing

by BizBoost
26 replies
Howdy,

I'm wondering if anyone has a metaphor, or just any effective way, of explaining internet marketing to friends and families. "I sell stuff online.", doesn't really cut it because they assume something like straight sales on eBay or Craigslist. But our style of internet marketing is a little more creative and complex than that.

Anyone else been through this?

Thanks,
Eric
#explains #explanation #give #internet #marketing #metaphor
  • Profile picture of the author Scott Ames
    Thats a hard one. My wife asks all the time what I do and its really difficult to explain without going into detail. Even if I give detail, she stares with a blank look on her face. I would be interested to see what people come up with.
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  • Profile picture of the author rickdearr
    I used to own a convenience store/gas station, this is allot like that. If you are an affiliate marketer, you let them put their products in your store, like when you send an email for an affiliate promotion, and you get paid when things sell. No that's a crappy analogy... I'll have to think some more about it...
    Hmmmm
    I'll have to get back to you...

    There has to be a good analogy, just got to run to the airport right now, so I'll post it when I land... (If I have got it)
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    Rick Dearr
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  • Profile picture of the author wolfmonk
    I tried to explain this stuff many times, it always depends on who you're speaking with.

    I ended up with explaining that I look at some data and make decisions. If I make CORRECT decisions, I get paid

    It satisfies plain curiosity and if they want more, they shall ask more questions
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  • Profile picture of the author koolwarrior
    Banned
    Here's how I explain to my friends and family what I do.

    "I do affiliate marketing where I refer people to other people's websites. For instance, there's a site that sells a weight loss program, and kicks out 50% of the sale to anyone who refers a customer. My job is to find fat people who want to lose weight, and tell them about the site. When they buy, I get 50% of what they spent."


    Then they go "WOW! How do you know about all this?" At that point, I give them my website's URL or I give them my affiliate link to the Rich Jerk
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  • Profile picture of the author Matt Bard
    You're a product representative.

    That means that you advertise, determine distribution channels, plan promotions, and sales.

    Or, like a McDonald's franchise but you don't sell burgers.
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    • Profile picture of the author DeadGuy
      I used to have a job I liked
      It made me lots of money.
      But up at 6 and home by 5
      Now really sounds quite funny.

      Directing people to and fro
      Is how I make my living.
      They gladly pay the price I ask
      When they see what I am giving.

      The net is full of long lost souls
      All wanting to be rich.
      They're not afraid to spend some cash
      To reach that noble wish.

      I'm just there to guide their steps
      Toward that glowing pot of gold.
      They're in a rush and like to think
      They'll make millions before they're old.

      Now I can't tell you what I do
      Or describe it to the masses.
      But I have 4 boats and 18 cars
      Paid for by selling classes.
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      You are making this work at home stuff way harder than it is. Ready for some sanity? Clear your head and start over.

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      • Profile picture of the author esr
        Originally Posted by DeadGuy View Post

        I used to have a job I liked
        It made me lots of money.
        But up at 6 and home by 5
        Now really sounds quite funny.

        Directing people to and fro
        Is how I make my living.
        They gladly pay the price I ask
        When they see what I am giving.

        The net is full of long lost souls
        All wanting to be rich.
        They're not afraid to spend some cash
        To reach that noble wish.

        I'm just there to guide their steps
        Toward that glowing pot of gold.
        They're in a rush and like to think
        They'll make millions before they're old.

        Now I can't tell you what I do
        Or describe it to the masses.
        But I have 4 boats and 18 cars
        Paid for by selling classes.


        That was awesome! Thanks Deadguy. Do you REALLY own 18 cars? To me, that just sounds like an extra decision I'd have to make every day that I don't need. (How's THAT for sour grapes? LOL)
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  • Profile picture of the author mikemcmillan
    I've said before it is kind of like a Realtor selling a house. They are selling a product which they don't own themselves in order to receive a commission on the sale. Affiliate marketers put a lot of work into closing sales just as Realtors do.
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    • Profile picture of the author ShayB
      Affiliate Marketing is like telling people about your favorite pizza joint, but with a twist - you get a commission every time someone buys a pizza.

      You do the same thing - tell people about a product and make money if they buy.
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      "Fate protects fools, little children, and ships called Enterprise." ~Commander Riker
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  • Profile picture of the author dave147
    [DELETED]
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    • Profile picture of the author marcanthony
      It's like selling drugs -- while trying to convince everyone that drugs sell themselves. It's all bullshit really...
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  • Profile picture of the author Traffic101
    LOL... I have the same issues. I've slowly been educationing my spouse, so he knows what PR is, and how you just can't build a website and expect people to come. But if it's someone else, I just tell them I write online as a hobby. Until it's a full time job, I figure that's sufficient information. I mean right now I'm an accountant and if I tried explaining my day job to people, they still stare at me with that blank expression.
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  • Profile picture of the author jasonl70
    lol - I just went though this a few hours ago with a friend when he saw me pull up my clickbank account

    I said I run websites and newsletters, which I use to promote and market products/services from.
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    -Jason

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    • Profile picture of the author Andyhenry
      I just tell people that I own Google.

      If they don't believe me, I show them the checks they keep sending to my home that I don't do anything for.

      Usually I just say I'm Internet problem solver --- I find people who want/need something and I get the solution in front of them, and I make money whether they buy or not.

      Andy
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      nothing to see here.

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  • Profile picture of the author Adaptive
    Eric, it sounds like the people you're talking with want to figure out which of their existing pigeonholes to put you into. They're not actually interested in learning anything, not even the two sentence summary of what you really do. So what you need is a conversation stopper.

    I recommend: "I set up computer programs to help people who sell things online."

    Then whatever they come up with - Oh, that's like punch cards, isn't it? It's like eBay, isn't it? It's like Java, isn't it? Oh, my nephew makes web pages, how cute..
    just say, "No, it's not like that, it's a specialized system only used by marketers."

    Guaranteed conversation stopper. They now have the pigeonhole: something mysterious about computers and marketing, not worth asking more.

    Regards,
    Allen
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  • Profile picture of the author Kris Turner
    How about keeping it simple by saying: "I create and market high quality information products online"?
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    • Profile picture of the author Midas3 Consulting
      Depends what element of IM you're trying to explain, do you mean affiliate marketing?

      If so, it's pretty simple, no ?

      " I send traffic to a website and the owner of that website pays me a commision for sending them the traffic"..

      Why over complicate it, if they can't grasp the above it's time to get new friends :-)
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  • Profile picture of the author MaxReferrals
    Doing 50 things at once hoping it sticks.
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  • Profile picture of the author BizBoost
    Lol!! All these are either wonderfully direct or supremely funny! I think all of these suggestions could be employed depending on the situation. Some people are super-intellectual and would do better with one type of reply... some are super-emotional and would do better with a funny reply (like Andy's)...

    Adaptive was right on, too... people are really just trying to pigeonhole us when they ask.

    So, maybe I'm better off finding something more fitting to my personal style. It might be a tad obtuse but I don't believe it's over the top...

    "I wake up, shuffle over to my computer and see how many people paid me for referring them to things they could have found without my help."

    Would anyone here say that about described it?

    Eric
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  • Profile picture of the author ryanvhamer
    I would say you are a product matchmaker of sorts. You provide the introduction between the product/service and the potential customer. Of course its not as easy as simply setting up the date and intruducing the two but there are other elements that come into play such as setting up the time the place to meet and of course you are the go between and you smooth everything over and then finally get the happy couple together where they live happily ever after until the need to meet a new partner/product.
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    • Profile picture of the author BizBoost
      Originally Posted by Clintonio View Post

      My metaphor.
      Have you ever needed a problem solved. I've solve all sorts of problems with the power of the Internet.
      But they think that just means you're good at Googling... it needs something added to it... but what?

      Originally Posted by ryanvhamer View Post

      I would say you are a product matchmaker of sorts. You provide the introduction between the product/service and the potential customer. Of course its not as easy as simply setting up the date and intruducing the two but there are other elements that come into play such as setting up the time the place to meet and of course you are the go between and you smooth everything over and then finally get the happy couple together where they live happily ever after until the need to meet a new partner/product.
      Sounds like a madam at a brothel. Might not be a bad metaphor, though... after all, many marketers do get "f******" a few times until they finally settle down with the right product, program or person, right?
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  • Profile picture of the author Matt Bard
    Now that I thought about it more, I would say a freelance or an independent sales rep for Internet vendors.

    Find leads for companies.
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