Review my partial sales video

Hey Matt. Congrats on your upcoming product.

Your point here stood out to me immediately because the beginning of your video had too much "script" and "I-heard-it-before" copywriting. Listen you look like an honest guy, and I really want to believe what you are saying, but to me, the overly tight production values of your video are getting in the way of YOU and I making a personal connection.

If you are selling me something that is really quite this personal, I need to be hooked in to this video from the first moments, and I need to really BELIEVE every word you are saying. I feel that your sales copy / script is actually inhibiting some of your natural passion for your product.

So yes, then perhaps you can start off dead smack in the middle of one of those interviews, then loop back into how you are going to help that person. Some of the gym shots can also be used a b-roll while you cover some of the major sales copy points that you will need to get across.

Let's face it, you are in an ultra-competitive market so to me cookie-cutter sales copy is not ideal. What I need to see here is sincere passion, honestly and emotion. (And I do also say this from the point of losing 30 pounds recently.)

You may not agree with everything that Gary says in this video below, but from the very first moments you MUST absolutely believe him, and respect HIS passion for the message. This is the crux of what I feel you are missing in your video, and what will keep you from making a measurable impact in a very competitive niche.