6 {{ upvoteCount | shortNum }}
6 {{ upvoteCount | shortNum }}

Critique!

by Freddie Worrall
5 replies
Hey guys,

Hope your all well.

Recently I've been working on my auto-responder series.

I wanted to ask what you guys think of the opt-in page, free report and the series itself. Please don't hold back with any criticisms, I love them, they're what drives me ever closer to a really great email marketing list and ever closer to pleasing my subscribers and offering them what they want and need.

Here's a link

I've also been working on sub list's recently. This is a great angle of attack for any of you marketers out there that haven't considered this approach. So you basically use individual categories within your niche and create a series of lists based of the main subjects. This means that you can target your customers much more effectively, thus giving you and them much more value....which of course is what us proper marketers always aim to do, provide massive value to our loyal subscribers.

Just thought I'd chuck that in so it's not all take, take, take, a little giving is always good.

Thanks for your time guys, I look forward to all your criticism's!

Cheers,

Freddie
#auto-responder #critique #email marketing #list building
  • Profile picture of the author JohnMcCabe
    Two words, Freddie - TOO MUCH.

    It's way too busy. I counted ten possible options for action in just the first screen, and none of them were your opt-in form.

    The whole 'green box' should go in the footer. Scratch that, the current footer is fine. Lose the green box altogether.

    Reduce the line spacing on your bullets so they fit above the fold.

    The stuff in the right column is fine for content pages, but on your lander you don't need it. For the landing page, I'd switch to a single column page template.

    If you scroll just until the green box is gone, you'll see what should appear just below the header graphic. I would shrink the second ebook graphic (the one below the arrows) so that the form shows on the opening screen. Then lose the form under the bullets. That close together, it just looks messy.

    As for the report itself, again, too much. You're promising a comprehensive marketing course in return for an email. Sounds way too good to be true. Take three benefits from the pure squeeze you link to, and make those your bullets:
    • How to Start Your Internet Business Today
    • How to Start Making Sales Quickly
    • How to See Your First Profits Fast
    The table of contents you list sounds like a) too good to be true for a free report and/or b) too much work.

    I've handed you a bunch of criticism, but I do have to commend you for a good first effort...
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[7714288].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Freddie Worrall
      Really great input John, thank you very much. I had a little 'fiddle' as it were, what do you reckon?
      Signature
      Guaranteed Risk Free Money (UK)
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[7714504].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author Shaun OReilly
        You need to take away a LOT of unnecessary clutter
        from your opt-in page and follow some very simple and
        proven fundamentals...

        For example, the FIRST thing you should see on an
        effective squeeze page is a headline.

        Instead, on your page the many things that catch my
        eye... the blue logo/banner, the green section below
        it with a ton of shit that's hard to read.

        Get rid of both those sections and the header navigation
        as well.

        Instead, have a simple squeeze page:

        Headline, Benefits, Offer, Call-to-Action and Opt-in box.

        That's it. No need to complicate things.

        Dedicated to mutual success,

        Shaun
        Signature

        .

        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[7714551].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Raydal
    I just want to concur with those before that your page
    is far too busy. Shaun already gave you the outline
    to follow, you just have to ad some flesh but don't
    make it overweight.

    About 10 years ago I read a book by Steve Krug
    called Don't Make Me Think. This should be required
    reading for every online marketer.

    The essence of the book is that your website should
    be so simply and intuitive that I don't have to think
    in order to understand your message. And right now
    you are making your visitors think a lot.

    Where do I start? What is this about? Should I
    sign up now or read the rest of the page? Should
    I click on the top links or the bottom ones?

    You get the point. I suggest you get the book.

    -Ray Edwards
    Signature
    The most powerful and concentrated copywriting training online today bar none! Autoresponder Writing Email SECRETS
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[7714626].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author longblog
    I agree with the other two posters. There's way too much going on with that page. 50% of your valuable Above The Fold real estate is taken up with a very cluttered header - it's totally distracting.

    I think you should get rid of the entire green section of your header; at least for the squeeze page.

    Make sure the meat and potatoes of your offer is easier to discover. I had to search around to figure out what the sqeeze page was even trying to offer me.

    Put this line above the squeeze form: "So with all this up for grabs, why not grab your copy now and get started on your internet business, it’s simple and we’re ready to show you just how to do it." and condense it.

    Make your headlines bigger. Center your content, put your squeeze box right next to your content.

    Get rid of the border on your image. Put your image closer to your squeeze fields.

    Maybe pay someone on fiverr to make a page for you, since that's not your strong point. Graphic Designers think differently and have an eye for what is visually appealing.
    Signature
    Are you ready to make an extra $1300 this month? Click here to find out how easy it is!

    Complete All-in-One WordPress Training - Sign up now!
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[7714655].message }}

Trending Topics