Doubt & Fear...the dream killers

2 replies
It still amazes me and makes me think why the school system hasn't taken the time to reform their lesson plans and actually make lasting change in kids. Since this is where it all starts to form...

All those doubts in one self and one's ability to succeed.

Most of this is preemptive. And can be fixed early on in a child's life...where an identity is formed. But I guess society can't function if the society (low and middle class earners) decide to focus on other things than regular jobs.

It is the school's and a child's parent's fault that they turn out like they are.

But enough yammering about what should have been.

If you want to become better outwards, you start by looking inwards.

If you haven't gotten the results you wanted, it IS because YOU are at FAULT.

This is fixed by looking inside of yourself and asking specific questions to WHY you think/feel this way.

It's not an easy fix. It sometimes takes years. There are a lot of sites out there that cover limiting beliefs and how YOU can go about finding/exposing them and reframing them into better ones that gives you power.

I for one had a lot of "I'm not good enough" and "whatever I do, turns to crap anyway".

And those 2 are very big ones.

All of these I got from my mom and I do blame her. I will always blame her, BUT I only blame her for my past. NOT for my future. This is YOUR own responsibility to take care of. Sure, it's not your fault you turned out like you are now, but it's NOT anyone else fault you CONTINUE to be like this, that's on you!

"I'm not good enough" and "whatever I do, turns to crap anyway" oftentimes cause a result of fear and doubt in yourself and your abilities.

That's why goal setting doesn't work for those people if they don't go against their own programming & belief system. I'll cover these 2 in this post.

And this will always make them stand still because they want to go one way in their head, and another in their feelings.

The thought process goes like this...

"Ooh! I want this/do this!" --> [Feelings of positivity and excitement come in, rush of adrenaline, endorphins & dopamine, at some rare cases oxytocin] --> [Thinking about all the possibilities and dreams of grandeur and the end goal]...(depending on how good/strong your mindset and programming is)
--> [you either start to research it, go into it 100% and find different ways you could do this in theory, or if you have a really bad mindset, your brain hits you with the negative hormones causing you to just stop] the quicker you stop, the worse is your mindset.

So how do you get rid of "I'm not good enough" and "whatever I do, turns to crap anyway"?

Well the story begins at an early age, when you find "evidence" (I say this loosely since it IS relative) of what you do, doesn't turn out the way you wanted.

Find evidence that you could do it. Someone that tried it before you and succeeded.

Or go back to whatever instance you can think of and run that movie through your head of the time THIS happened. How did you feel?

Bad didn't you?

So now I want you to SEE yourself as you do this and IMAGINE a DIFFERENT ending.

Apply your feelings to it. See an alternative ending where the movie turns out in your favor.

How does that feel?

Better doesn't it?

To make it even more effective...

1) Just DECIDE to LET GO of the fear and doubt and just DECIDE that you'll focus on how it would be to win. JUST POSITIVE AND GOOD EMOTIONS. Nothing else exists.

2) In that instance where you didn't get what you wanted, just say to yourself in that movie, "I didn't fail now, I learned what didn't work for me, it doesn't mean I'm bad or a failure, it just means that next time I try I will be better prepared".

Mind you...this isn't done in a day. You trained yourself to have doubt, fear, insecurities, negativity for a lot of years. If you apply the same amount of years into constantly feeling happy, positive, good, secure etc, you will have the SAME EFFECT, but to your favor.
#doubt #dream #fearthe #killers
  • Profile picture of the author Gandolfo85
    That's a clever tool to overcome any self-doubts along way and it can be more powerful if you change the perception of your negative memories with NLP reframing techniques and your desired outcome, as you said.
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  • Profile picture of the author mentat47
    Yeah, doubt and fear are definitely the bigest enemies of every human being!

    If you like to do something, you don't have to doubt like: is it gonna be, am I be able to handle with that, what if... etc. If you plan to do something, just put your thoughts in you brain and start to program yourself. Thoughts are like clouds, they are coming and leaving.

    On the other side fear can also destroy your dreams. According to me, doubts are the messenger of fear. So, if there is doubt, they will be and fear.
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