Why and how to fix shyness

15 years ago

Im really shy, i hate talking infront of the class or somthing, i always feel nervous. When im with my friends im alright, when im with strangers im decent, but when it's me on my own in front of everybody, i get shy xD

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acedalright

15 years ago

You have to bite the bullet and work your way out of it by starting small and talkingto strangers and slowly increasing your aptitude in this area.

I was a shy introvert and realized my kids might miss out on all things I did, so I bit the bullet and started my own progression out of it.

First I would talk to random people with tiny pleasantries

Next I went to full scale questions and flattery

Then I started to joke

Now I'm a really social extravert andit comes with so many benefits

Shyness is a disease that will rob you of money, friendship, love and social support.

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rocketmail009 15 years ago

I always find that breathing deeply helps me. I am extremely shy to and talking in front of a lot of people absolutely kills me. Try breathing in for 7 seconds and out again for another 4 seconds. This can help before speeches and things. But if you want to stop blushing completely without all this the best way will probably be to become more confident. Join a group of some sort, maybe not one that you need to talk all the time like a drama one. Join a swimming group or something like that. At least with swimming no one can tell if your blushing, just stick Ur head in the water or if your anything like me swimming pools make you go red anyway Talking to people will help you become more confident )
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- Matt D. 15 years ago
  
  Well I'll give you a very simple advice. Make friends with more guys. Go out there and start talking to them. I know it's hard and it feels bad, but what exactly can happen?
  
  I think every one of us is shy to some degree. I also think that people who talk too much are not really smart, it can happen you tell a bit too much very fast. Listen more than talk, but don't be shy to start conversations.
  
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Peter Temp

15 years ago

Hey this is a nice topic to discuss, and some nice suggestions presented. Most of the people are shy talking to new people, the reason may be because they don't get any interesting topic where in the conversation can go on for a longer time as they hardly know each other. Introduction is the only thing that happens. So i would say start observing which will help you to get to understand the good things about each individual and will help you to interact with them the better way. Thanks

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kennethsmith72

15 years ago

Be confident and not to be shy.Shyness it can't help anyway.......

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emofree

15 years ago

well for me personally I'am also a shy person when I talk or introduced to a new friend same as you are. but I usually build my confidence in talking to them removing my shyness factor. maybe that depends on who you are talking with.

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smile633

15 years ago

I am leanring to accept my character and other - unfamiliar and sometimes uncomfortable - ways to communicate. Just because it feels strange to it does not mean I should stop.
We all have our preferred ways of doing things, but can learn the opposite way if we want to.

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EIH888

15 years ago

What are you saying to yourself or how do you feel before you meet these guys? If you find the voice in your head saying, "what are these guys going to think of me? Are they going to like me?" or something where you find you really want their approval or you really want to make a "good impression" that can make you very nervous or shy.

Compare that with what you say to yourself or how you feel during an interaction where you aren't shy.

Maybe that will help...

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paperkool

15 years ago

Shyness seems to be the mark of intellect, in my opinion. People who are extroverts are apparently that way to make a gain of some sort. This is not to say that extroverts are not intelligent. I'm usually quite because I'm studying my surroundings. This is sometimes mistaken for shyness. Really what is the gauge to determine what is an extravert and what is shy? Cultures differ as dialect and values have differences all over the planet.

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manadospace 15 years ago

- put your self with all people
- all people same with you
- self confident
- think if you special
- be stronger

hope this help
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SamKane

15 years ago

Shyness is NOT a mark of intellect. What's smart about missing out on
possible friends ,romances and clients.

Shyness usually happens to people who OVER THINK about how
others see them. As much as you may think your smarter
than others because your "studying your surroundings" , most
people are NOT thinking about YOU at all.

So admit you're a little afraid of the situation. But take
action anyway -- eventually you get over your shyness
through action...

Originally Posted by paperkool

Shyness seems to be the mark of intellect, in my opinion. People who are extroverts are apparently that way to make a gain of some sort. This is not to say that extroverts are not intelligent. I'm usually quite because I'm studying my surroundings. This is sometimes mistaken for shyness. Really what is the gauge to determine what is an extravert and what is shy? Cultures differ as dialect and values have differences all over the planet.

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Paul Ho

15 years ago

One good technique I've found is to force yourself to stare into the eyes of the other person.. basically force yourself to make eye contact.. this can be very difficult during the first few times.. but after awhile you'll generally grow more confident.

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MurphSmurf 15 years ago

I consider myself a shy person, although I've changed a lot in the past year or so. The best way to break yourself out of your shell is to work around people all the time so that you're constantly forced to communicate and express yourself.

At least, that's what has worked for me.

Previously, you would've NEVER seen me

-Giving orders
-Speaking up in front of an entire room of my co-workers
-Provoking / arguing with a supervisor

I've done all of these things in the last week without blinking an eye. I guess from being around people all the time, I've learned that there's no point feeling inadequate or thinking that no one wants to hear what you have to say. Even if they don't, who cares?

I'm still very quiet, though. I'm simply not a talkative person. But now I can honestly say it's not because of shyness... it's just my personality.
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- Jack Chua 15 years ago
  
  I think I have overcome my shyness when I was assigned with more responsibilities at my work place. It was a turning point for me because it made me realize that my shyness can't do any good to achieve my success in what I am assigned to do. I have to challenge myself to get over it and speak out.
  
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Shana_Adam

15 years ago

I think sometimes shyness could be disguised as lack of interest.

If you don't know some one then you would not be interested in them. Then that may make you feel awkward by thinking of their perception of you.

Sometimes its just too draining to be making small talk with boring people. How do you know they are boring? Well if they were not you would be interested in making conversations with them - a certain energy and rapport would be present.

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Gary Pettit

14 years ago

Try to mingle with other people slowly. Build your confidence so you can act yourself without being conscious on what other people will say towards your personality.

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thebrightredfish 14 years ago

I used to be shy too. But I gradually overcame my shyness when I let go of trying to appear good or perfect to the other people and just be myself , and not caring how they think.
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Gator1

14 years ago

Try to make sure you get out of your comfort zone and talk to people. It will get much easier the more you do it. Try to make it a point to go to all the social functions in your area that you are able to and make it a point to meet at least 2 new people every time and you will be amazed how much this will help you and how quickly you will transform.

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PeterDunin

14 years ago

I have the opposite problem I'm shy around women,I don't know why either.I seem to get very shy when introduced to women unless I've had a few beers before hand.It's strange because I actually prefer the company of women when I've got over that initial shyness.

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tryinhere

14 years ago

So, as said in the title above, i am clueless as to why i am shy sometimes

.

Personal Development Pro [Dot] Net. A personal development blog for the making of an independent, strong, simple and happy individual.

Lets see your shy around boys ? you may be a he boy and not know it yet, or maybe drop a line to that personal development pro thats in your Sig ?

what one is is it ? shy or a dev pro ? or just confused about everything ?

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wvcopywriter

14 years ago

I have always been shy to a point. Not so much now than when I was younger. When in school people thought I was stuck up because I never would talk to anyone. I was just so scared to talk to anyone.

The only way I made friends was they started to talk to me first and then after I got to know them, they couldn't get me to shut up, LOL

I'm pretty much over it except when it comes to talking on the phone. I would rather talk face to face.

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Stephen Bray

14 years ago

Originally Posted by Nik Karlil

I don't consider myself introvert. I just dont talk much to someone im not familiar with (only guys).

My suspect was, i subconsciously do not want to make new friends with guys.

I used to be terribly shy, and also
scared to make mistakes when in
company.

The reason, no doubt, is that before
the age of six I rarely met other kids
and going to school for the first time
was a real ordeal.

That difference helped me a great deal
when I was older because I was able to
perceive life as an outsider, and therefore
think outside of the box, and act beyond
my original conditioning.

There's nothing wrong with being introverted
but what can you do about its disadvantages
in order to thrive in business?

Easy, find an extrovert, someone who knows
how to organise a supper party, the gut who
can strike up a conversation in a supermarket
or bar. This person will preferably be someone
older and accomplished in all you wish to
achieve.

Thank the Gods for delivering them to you
and hang on their shirt-tails through thick
and thin.

You will learn how to relate to others in
the ways your parents never prepared you.

That's all there is to it!

Stephen

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ColdFire123

13 years ago

Try to participate in any programs or activities. you just need to practice it so that you can gain more self-confidence.

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Why and how to fix shyness

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