Lost Support From Loved Ones

9 replies
The last year and a half have been my most focused in terms of creating a solid business online. I have a small trickle of money coming in through some of my early efforts but this apparently is not enough success for my girlfriend to accept me continuing the business. What she doesn't know is that for personal reasons i have made more than i have told her, so think doesn't think i have made much at all.

I wanted that because we are both students, and i never wanted our relationship to be about money, but that's turning into the main focus now. Her family is wealthy and her parents love me, but she is starting to think of me as a failure that needs to get a job (its really quite the opposite in reality).

I didn't think her mind would change so drastically. Where the hell does she think i get the money i spend on us? Knowing the money aspect of her now, I am thinking of slowly separating myself from her until I am firmly emotionally rebuilt (she was my first serious girlfriend, i know the number of days we have been together). I am most likely going to tell her how much i am really making, but end it saying that she is far different than what i expected. Because really, she is.
#lost #loved #support
  • Profile picture of the author blillard
    Bro I know the feeling all to well. My first real girlfriend was chinese who came from a wealthy family as well. I told her showed her that I can make money online and still it is never good. I believe the reason is being they don't understand the nature of this industry so they say go get a job because its more stable, true but that job will never be more than what it is and that's a job. Think about how she feels when she tell mommy what you do for a living. He is an online entrepreneur or worst IM NOT SURE WHAT HE DOES FOR A LIVING. Its your job to get her to understand your end goal and that this could really set you free financially. But the journey to get there is hard is hell so it's her job to support to you even if she can't grasp what is going on in the background. I had to make that choice and my friend the choice was my business because I knew thats what's important to ME. Judging by the issue your having, your young like me, Im 25. You might have to give her more than you are letting her know or she will never get it bro. Also remember your young and if you can get this right now the sky is the limit and there WILL be tons of women who will see your success for what it is. BITCH LOOK AT ME NOW OH
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  • Profile picture of the author ladywriter
    If a boyfriend felt he had to lie to me about his income, I would be upset. That said, if she is making money that big of an issue you are probably right to be concerned.

    Why not just have an honest, open conversation instead of just deciding you're going to end it outright? Maybe she doesn't realize that she is driving you away. It would be a shame to end a good relationship without seeing if you can work things out first.
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  • Profile picture of the author viscoa
    You should be concerned about money being an issue for her but also she should know you are lying to her. I think you both are at fault and an honest conversation needs to happen.
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  • Profile picture of the author roosevelt
    Hi,
    it does kind of sucks but do realize that girls also look for security. Whether you're charming or not, they also think long-term and if you can actually support her financially. Whether she likes you now for your money or not, it will become an issue later on. It doesn't hurt disclosing how much you are really making, but in my opinion you should think about whether you really like this person for who she is. If you think she likes you only for your money then you should move on and find someone you're more comfortable sharing your wealth with.

    For now, focus on building your business. If you're not making enough money right now then, get a day job, save money and do online businesses part-time. But if you're not on that boat and can afford the time and money to invest in online businesses, then focus on it.

    Do not waste your time thinking she is all that. Who knows, she might be seeing someone already. Until, you are financially stable and have enough resources and comfort to share your wealth with someone else don't focus too much on her.

    Secure your future first and then get emotional.
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  • Profile picture of the author Nereah
    Financial security is important to both men and women. I think you should first focus on being secure, and get involved later when you are more confident with yourself financially since you are quite young. Only remember you will not be young forever and you have to make certain decisions about what you really want. But really money should never be a major issue for those who care about each other, it can come and go in a flash, but together you can always make it if you work towards achieving your goals.
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  • Profile picture of the author AmandaT
    You may not think it should be... but money is important to her for a reason. If she wants to build a future with you, she wants to know it will be a secure one. You lying to her isn't going to help... It probably isn't the money that is the issue, but the fact she wants to know you guys can have a financially secure future together.
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  • Profile picture of the author Tainted Seraphim
    Perhaps if you had been more honest with her about how much money you were actually making, she might not consider you to be a failure.

    Honesty is key.
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    • Profile picture of the author heavysm
      I should have elaborated more in the first post. There is a reason I am making such drastic action. Her complaining about money is merely the tip of the ice berg for our problems. There have been other men, which I forgave stupidly. We agreed from the start that my lack of money wouldn't be a problem. Getting a job after I get my degree would be my plan. She has obviously changed her mind. I am not proud that I haven't told her of my true earnings, but that should have never been a factor in the first place because we had already discussed it.

      She didn't care about the business until i began putting more hours into it to make it work. At that point she just complained that she wasn't seeing me enough. And when i did share my earnings with her she merely brushed it off as if it didn't matter. She deprioritized what was important to me. My point is, I did try but she ultimately didn't seem to care. My original post does no justice to the full situation, but its hard to convey the situation in under a thousand words without getting too emotional or wordy.
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  • Profile picture of the author AmandaT
    If the problems are that bad... there are two paths you can take.

    1. Break off the relationship. She isn't supporting your ambitions, hasn't stayed faithful, and you obviously aren't happy. This will be the easiest solution. You can break it off for good or take a break and see how you both feel after some time apart.

    2. Relationship counseling. If you care about her and want to try and make it work, get some help. I met my husband when I was in 9th grade. We started dating in 10th. The two of us have changed a lot since then and are very different people. This lead to a lot of issues and more than once we almost broke things off before we got married, but we got some help and fixed the problems. While no relationship is perfect, we are happy together and it has been worth it.

    Basically, step back and decide if this relationship is worth fixing. Do you see yourself being able to be happy with her? Do you think she is willing to put in the time and effort to fix the problems in your relationship?
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