44 replies
Many people on the Warrior Forum might have seen some of my posts and seen that I am a pretty upbeat dude and I try to help as many people as I can, when I have the time.

But, I'm going to be honest.

I am afraid of something.

I'm afraid of death. I know this is a pretty controversial subject, but when it comes down to it, I have an absolute fear of it.

In 2007 my first older brother Lee passed away due to Hepatitis (cancer).

In 2008 my second brother Jonathan passed away due to him committing suicide (he has schizophrenia).

In 2010 my aunt Theresa passed away due to overdose.

And now it's 2011...

In 2011, my sister was treated for a tumor or something of that nature and had surgery, luckily she's okay.

My mom recently went to the hospital because she had an extremely high blood pressure due to overwhelming stress. She was almost kicked out of her apartment, so I went to her landlord personally and paid her rent. It scares me to think that someone can be 1 paycheck away from total devastation and that's why I want to help people, including my family.

Well, last night I got a call from my dad.

Come to find out he has been to the hospital twice in the last month or so, supposedly due to something with his colon. He had to have some type of surgery and they found a blockage (I have no clue what any of this means to be honest). This lead me to believe he had colon cancer and I'm quite afraid to be honest.

So as you can see.. I have justified reasons for the fear that I have and I want to look to the Warrior Forum to help me through this... I've met a lot of wonderful people here, even some that I can consider good friends now.

I thank you all for being so amazing, inspiring, motivational, and helpful. I can say that I wouldn't be where I am today if it wasn't for the help from some of the Warriors here and I hope some can say the same of me.

Again, thank you for reading this post. I don't have a question to ask of anyone, I just wanted to share my experiences and my fear with the community.

It's beautiful outside.. I'm going to go and see my dad today.

P.S. I am not showing my signature on this thread because it is more personal.



One final note. I didn't include a signature of this post, so I'm going to share a video that I recorded for a few people that were struggling last month. If the moderators feel that providing this link is not acceptable, then please do erase this part of the post.

My life, your life: http://vimeo.com/30276632

Thanks everyone!
#afraid #cancer #fear #fearsome #scary
  • Profile picture of the author LadyZelda
    I sometimes have a fear of death too. As i am Christian minded and raised in a Christian background we are taught to seek God and that all will be well. But still it does not stop us from fearing death.

    I am sorry to hear that all of this is happening to you and your family. I would say that you too need to go and get yourself checked out just to make sure that you are ok.

    For me i take a wrong approach to death as i try to not confront it. You are young. I say enjoy life and live the best life that you possibly can.

    There is a saying that goes "the only sure thing in life is death"

    We cannot escape death to be honest so in my opinion i would not dwell on it too much. But take steps to preserve your health.
    Signature
    Do you need 100% original, professionally written articles? Click here
    Check out my Classified Ad and place your orders HERE for High Quality Articles Today
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4887130].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Reddevil007
    Hey wishing your dad a speedy recovery.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4887135].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Samrath Gupta
    Hi Justin,

    I agree that I dont know you from months or years but after having a small talk with you I came to a conclusion that you are really a very great person who really cares to help people. There are other IM'ers who will only help you if you pay them but you are different from them, You really help people without cahrging them for your time or anything.

    Now coming to your concern that you have a fear from death, Believe it or not but over 90% people in this world fear from death and it is quite natural.

    God gave us a beautifull life and utilizing it is in our hands. As you said about the deaths of your brothers and you stated that you think that your father might have a colone cancer.

    First of all go and get yourself as well as your dear one's pass under full checkup of their body because MOney Can return But When a dear ones passes away he doesnt returns.

    Now since you fear a lot I would recommend you to wake in the morning at around 5-6AM and MEDITATE at a quite and Green place. Relax your mind and when you are in meditation pose just always think about good things happened with you and try not to remember any bad points of life. Feel that you are at a very positive person and just imagine things you want.

    NEVER-EVER IMAGINE OF THINGS WHICH YOU DONT WANT !!

    Just my personal opinion !!
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4887168].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author VinceReed
    Godspeed upon you buddy, thanks for sharing. Fear of death can be encompassing sometimes... It would be good to seek out some guidance from people who are well versed on the subject... try David R. Hawkins MD, PhD.

    I can definitely relate, but I can never know how other people are feeling. I lost my brother earlier this year and it was totally unexpected and devastating. I lost my aunt shortly before that to cancer.

    I'm definitely here for you Justin and wish nothing but peace on you heart right now, becuz you're right. Today is a beautiful day.
    Signature

    Looking For More Info About Me And Receive Additional Marketing Training And Tools =>Click Here

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4887348].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Takuan
    Originally Posted by Justin Lewis View Post


    I'm afraid of death. I know this is a pretty controversial subject, but when it comes down to it, I have an absolute fear of it.
    I think everyone is a little afraid of death. I'll even admit to having a bit of an aversion to the idea of one day dying, but I'm trying to work on it. What's the point of being fearful of something that's inevitable? Death is something everyone will experience. Just like life is something everyone is currently experiencing.

    As of late, I've been actually contemplating the thought of death. At first, I thought that such meditations would be rather depressing, but the result has been quite the opposite.

    If you want, try these meditations:


    Short contemplation on death:
    youtube.com/watch?v=0viEVUMU0L4

    Detailed contemplation of death:
    youtube.com/watch?v=V4j5RJfu5X0
    These are from Buddhist sources, but every religion has their own way of doing this.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4887540].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author LeeLee
    You don't say what you fear about death. Does your loved ones leaving this world distress you beyond normal loss (it is part of life after all)? Do you fear losing others or dying yourself? Do you fear the unknowns of death? Do you fear being alone?

    That is a beautiful picture of your family. You look like a nice bunch.
    Signature
    The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of nonessentials. ~ Lin Yutang
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4887551].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author jlady
    Justin,

    I sometimes fear death also, as I get older I see more and more people getting very sick and dying. It is part of life. But I want to tell you 2 things. Christians believe in life after death of the physical body and that they will see their family/friends again in heaven. And God can perform miracles, he can heal people who are dying and have no more options for treatment. The beauty about being a Christian is that life doesn't end when we die.

    So you can pray for your father and anyone else who you know that is sick and ask God to heal them, he may not but then again he may. And also you can be assured you will see them again in heaven and they are in a better place than where we are.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4887564].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author sylviad
      Hi Justin,

      I'm glad you started this thread because, to be honest, I was hesitant to do so. That's because, as some have posted, death is inevitable. Somehow, that doesn't ease my mind at all. I figured people would think I'm "silly" for worrying about it and for starting such a thread.

      Just the other month I had heart tests reveal some sort of oxygen blockage. Well, since I feel perfectly fine and physical exercise has absolutely no bad effects on my heart, breathing or anything else I was shocked. Shaking and tearful, I sat in the doc's office and he asked what was wrong. I told him how much I was terrified of dying.

      He wasn't impressed, but he did day: "Well, no one wants to die. We just hope it's easy and painless." (Sometimes I wish docs could be a bit more compassionate.)

      To some degree, he's right, I suppose. No doubt we fear death because we don't know what to expect. It's not like we can look it up somewhere and get answers as to what happens afterwards. We don't know if it will hurt, how it will feel, what we'll experience. And it's difficult to imagine our minds suddenly not thinking - not being.

      My partner, who committed suicide in 1999, always reminded me that energy never dies. Since we are energy, something has to live on afterwards. He also told me he's not afraid to die.

      Apparently, he died once while on the operating table. He floated to the ceiling and looked down on the doctors as they worked on his body. His "energy" floated down the hall where he was able to see other things going on in the hospital. That experience might have been the evidence he needed to get beyond the fear.

      A day or so after his death, I was lying in bed and I felt a pressure behind me. It felt like someone was lying behind me. It was so real, I rolled over to be sure. It stopped. I rolled back on my side and felt it again. Another roll. This time it stopped for good. I like to think it was him, but I also don't want people to think I'm nuts.

      It's not the first time I've felt pressure on my back. When I was a teen, having a slight disagreement with my mother, I felt a hand right between my shoulder blades pushing me toward her. I even stumbled from the pressure. I turned to look behind me, thinking it was my brother. My mother said no one was there.

      Weird.

      These few instances have sort of convinced me that it's very possible that we do live on in some fashion.

      As I age (I'll be 67 in December), death comes to mind much more frequently. I just got a bad test for another problem and must go for an ultra sound. I'm petrified. I looked up the symptom to see what options it could be – of course, cancer is one so that strikes terror in me. I'm anxious about the test and keep putting it off. It could end up being nothing, but I still fret.

      I'm the ultimate coward, what can I say?

      What has helped me is reading true stories about people who've had near death experiences. Recently, I was reading something about quantum physics. A little over my head, but this portion was written for the layperson. That helped, too.

      The best advice I can give you is to do some research into death and near death experiences. See what's been written, what the science has to show. It's quite fascinating, actually.

      I recall one show where the topic was discussed. A doctor examined drawings done my children who had a near death experience. They showed what they had seen - their family and other things floating in the air, bright yellow light and other symbols I don't recall. If you can't believe what children have seen while in that state, who can you believe?

      Best,
      Sylvia
      Signature
      :: Got a dog? Visit my blog. Dog Talk Weekly
      :: Writing, Audio Transcription Services? - Award-winning Journalist is taking new projects. Warrior Discounts!
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4888170].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author danstelter
        Everyone's afraid of death. I'm a Christian and I'm still afraid of death, although not too much since I think it's a long way away yet.

        It may be helpful to focus on accepting the fear and the fact that you're normal. Sure, you've had some experiences with death that are certainly heightening your fear, but death is probably a long way away for you.

        Just relax and try to enjoy life is what I am learning, and even though I am not very good at that many times, it is the best way to live life. Nobody knows what's going to happen, so might as well live each day like its your last.
        Signature

        Do you need a top-notch copywriting service? Are you having a hard time finding article writing services that can write engaging content, do it well, and do it on time? If so, Dan's SEO Copywriting is the best solution for you! Great SEO article writing done well the first time pays for itself many times over in the long-run!

        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4888930].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author newbieproject
    Banned
    Hey Justin,

    Wow. Pretty open there. I like it. I have to tell you something, I only fear death for what I may leave unfinished behind (2nd) behind those closest to me dying being the 1st fear of death I have. My sister died very suddenly and unexpectedly from a burst brain aneurysm in 2009. I was totally devastated. I knew pretty quickly that 'most' of the pain I was feeling was from guilt. Guilt from not getting my sh*t together and going home and spending time with her. For all the wonderful plans I had once I got everything going, all for naught. Though suicide would never be an option, I wanted to give up on just about everything. I didn't come to terms with her death until this year, about 2 full years later. And just two weeks ago, my sons very best friend (they were like brothers) was killed in a freak accident we still aren't sure of on all the details. Him and his girlfriend just bought a house in January, and got married in June. 3 months later, he's gone. She's devastated as is my son.

    I guess my message is this. Spend all the time you can with those you love, not fearing they may die someday, because we're all going to die. Nothing we can do about it. All we can do is make the most of what we have here and now, stay connected, don't fight over anything if at all possible, and create those memories that will live on forever. This is what I didn't do, and I regret it deeply to this day. I'm going to check out the video now and perhaps come back with some more comments. Best of luck to you and your Dad.

    Chris Garvey
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4890119].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author vok
    Thanks for the link Justin via Skype. I just read your post, and I can relate a lot to how you've been feeling. I used to suffer very from dyslexia from a young age, since I was at high school I used to have a very self destructive attitude, I had this attitude where I'd argue a lot and I always through I'd never amount to anything.

    Now I'm a changed person, you can either accept defeat or you can start fighting back. There's a lot of things that want to drag you down in life, and you can either accept it or you can start to fight back and show life that you are the one in charge.

    One thing I have learned in life, is happiness is the most important thing in life and friends and family are so important.

    I always find these quotes motivational.



    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4891104].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author maile15
      Unbelievable,

      I wish your family all the best. Scary to see so many family members dying. Really all the best!
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4891155].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Chris Prescott
    I don't want to get to new Age here but, in my opinion, I don't think people really die. They pass away in the physical working, but consciousness continues to live on in the universe.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4891917].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author art72
    While I really didn't have time to read through all the posts...

    EDIT: O.K. I made the time, after all this is a topic I believe; we all want to gain a greater understanding over.

    *The Steve Jobs quote shows his brilliance!

    I actually don't fear death nearly 1/2 as much as not living life to the fullest, or living just to survive as so many (myself included) appear to be, in this quest for freedom.

    Yet, through a series of internal, external, spiritual, and meditative explorations concerning this life, subject matters such as; spirituality, meditation, and a deep passion for science, psychology, human behavioral patterns, and a wide range of philosophies keeps me going in the journey to obtain a greater understanding.

    In that regard, I do not fear death for me personally, as opposed to leaving unexpectedly, and either hurting the ones I love, or especially not finishing my work, by which I hope they will be survived by, and I will be remembered by.

    As a 'wannabe' writer of sort, I always admired how people's passions live on through writing, artwork, music, etc... and somehow it influences change from beyond the grave. That would be a small portion of my interpretation of reaching human immortality.

    I mean really, we're all going to die in the physical sense, sooner or later, why fear it?

    For Heaven's sake at this point, I almost feel we should embrace it. Not on a Jim Jones level, or anything of a religious fanaticism, or the likes, but my best friend died at 17 in a car crash. I often reflect on all the hardships, the pain, the scars, and the trials and tribulation living delivers from birth to death, and man, I think he was the fortunate one.

    While, I hold no reservation for suicide or self-destructive theories (anymore), I believe we possess the ability to "Tap Into" a higher intelligence. Call it God, Alien, Astral traveling, or just an open admission; we really don't know; now do we?

    Probability has it, we'd argue it if we could know.

    While I'll reserve my beliefs as to that mysterious force within us, and what happens with it upon death; science has proved at the very moment of death, something like 1-3 pounds instantly vacates out of our exoskeletal vessels, and goes where?

    ...can't really say for sure, but I'm guessing the energy gets recycled or continues on somehow.

    None the less, I am deathly afraid of failure, the dentist, and the obvious loss of values, virtues, principles, and our civility slowly being lost at the expense of ignorance and greed.

    In the end, I believe we are all being groomed for something greater.

    All the Best,

    Art

    PS- Sylviad, I too have had a near brush with death experience (self-induced) early on in my teens some 24 years ago, and only recall 4 tall figures standing over me, right before I was revived. And, Yes, it was drug-overdose for those who maybe wondering, and wasn't exactly the plan at the time.

    After months in rcovery and rehab as a teen, I was taught meditation, and there is no greater high!
    Signature
    Atop a tree with Buddha ain't a bad place to take rest!
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4892913].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author naruq
      F.E.A.R-False Evidence Appearing Real. Zig Ziglar.
      Signature

      Please do not use affiliate links in signatures

      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4893837].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author 4udaces
    Best of luck, mate.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4895088].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author melltonroper
    Just pray for the recovery of your Dad buddy!
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4895518].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author supershoesclub
    There is a old saying: life and death are twins.when we were bron,we should know we would die in some day in the future.no one would avoid the dealth.whatever leader or beggar.so we just think god is very fair to everybody in the world.all we should do is to lead a happy life with our families as much as possible.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4896820].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author liveformusic
      While I went to 12 years of Parochial school listening to all the Heaven and Hell indoctrination, I wound up rejecting that and developed my own theories regarding life and death (and at 61, I'm right in the "could happen any day now" zone) LOL

      The few things I feel certain about are:

      1) We don't die- Our energy, spirit, soul,
      whatever you wish to call it, changes form but does go on- Eternally

      2) The hardship, heartbreak, and difficulty we have in life (including the illness and death of loved ones), as sad and frightening as these events are, is something we MUST endure to assure the spiritual growth of that same energy source which is our essence. Sometimes it comes at you in waves, but you find the strength to cope- and that is the whole point.

      3) Prayer works- while the final outcome of a situation may not always be what you wished for, there are many instances where prayer will tip the balance in your favor- this has been scientifically proven time and time again

      4) Love is really the only thing that matters- it the most powerful force in the universe

      I certainly don't make claims to fully understand how it all integrates, but these are the philosophies I've distilled in my lifetime, and I'm okay with them.

      I can only say don't be afraid of death because there is nothing to be afraid of......
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4902794].message }}
      • Profile picture of the author sylviad
        Originally Posted by liveformusic View Post


        4) Love is really the only thing that matters- it the most powerful force in the universe

        I certainly don't make claims to fully understand how it all integrates, but these are the philosophies I've distilled in my lifetime, and I'm okay with them.

        I can only say don't be afraid of death because there is nothing to be afraid of......
        My first experience in losing a loved one was when my dog died in the 80s. I got him when he was 6 weeks old. He died at 16+ years old. We went through a lot together, from heartbreak to painful job losses to my struggle with emotional pain and panic disorder.

        When he died, I was devastated. He was my 'child', and there he was, at the vet's office being put down. I didn't even have the courage to be with him (which creates incredible guilt in me today that I couldn't be there for him). My partner went for me, which was good because Nikki was very close to him, so I know he was with someone who loved him.

        The emotional grief I went through leading to that moment of his death was indescribable. I paced the floor, prayed, begged, sobbed uncontrollably. I'd never cried so hard in my entire life.

        And then, all of a sudden, a tremendous peace came over me and I felt surrounded by an overpowering love. It was a very bizarre feeling, to go from such devastation and distress to peace and love showering down on me. It only lasted for a matter of seconds, and then all the torment returned. What did come to mind, however, was that "that's what life is all about - love!" And I believed that the love is what carries over to the next world that awaits us.

        When my partner returned from the vet's, I asked him what time Nikki had been put down. It was 8 p.m. - EXACTLY when I had that sensation of love and peace.

        I like to think that for those few seconds, I was getting some residual flow from the space that opened up for Nikki to pass over. I suppose I was really with him in spirit at that very moment.

        To this day, I'm convinced that something special happened to include me when he died. I believe I got a tiny glimpse of what we'll experience when we die - we'll enter a world of overwhelming love and peace.

        Since getting involved in this thread, I've done even more thinking about the idea of death, and today it hit me. In part, because of some things I've had to do lately to overcome my fears.

        Accept death. They say that when people die, they go peacefully because they have accepted it.

        There's one alternative to acceptance and that is to try to fight it, which of course we can't do. As soon as we learn to accept it, the fear will subside.

        Lately, I've actually felt much better accepting that I will die one day - in part, because of the thoughts that this thread has elicited in me.

        Thank you, Justin, for having the courage to post it.

        Sylvia
        Signature
        :: Got a dog? Visit my blog. Dog Talk Weekly
        :: Writing, Audio Transcription Services? - Award-winning Journalist is taking new projects. Warrior Discounts!
        {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4940900].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
          Banned
          Originally Posted by sylviad View Post

          And then, all of a sudden, a tremendous peace came over me and I felt surrounded by an overpowering love. It was a very bizarre feeling, to go from such devastation and distress to peace and love showering down on me. It only lasted for a matter of seconds, and then all the torment returned. What did come to mind, however, was that "that's what life is all about - love!" And I believed that the love is what carries over to the next world that awaits us.
          I had a dream about my Mum’s dog (Henry) when he passed away. He basically came to say goodbye and that he wasn't “going anywhere.”

          Many people don’t believe in this kind of thing, however I do. : )
          Signature
          "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4941509].message }}
          • Profile picture of the author sylviad
            Originally Posted by Jonathan 2.0 View Post

            I had a dream about my Mum's dog (Henry) when he passed away. He basically came to say goodbye and that he wasn't "going anywhere."

            Many people don't believe in this kind of thing, however I do. : )
            Every now and then I have dreams of people I haven't even thought of in decades. When I tell my friend about my latest dream (usually involving someone we once knew - my partner or this mutual acquaintance who also committed suicide or my ex), she says it's because they're thinking of us or they are near us. It'd be nice to believe that. I occasionally have dreams of my deceased dogs.



            Sylvia
            Signature
            :: Got a dog? Visit my blog. Dog Talk Weekly
            :: Writing, Audio Transcription Services? - Award-winning Journalist is taking new projects. Warrior Discounts!
            {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4941582].message }}
            • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
              Banned
              Originally Posted by sylviad View Post

              When I tell my friend about my latest dream (usually involving someone we once knew - my partner or this mutual acquaintance who also committed suicide or my ex), she says it's because they're thinking of us or they are near us.
              That could certainly be true. What I know 100% for sure is that there's more to life than many people understand. : )
              Signature
              "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
              {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4941611].message }}
        • Profile picture of the author Justin Says
          Originally Posted by sylviad View Post

          My first experience in losing a loved one was when my dog died in the 80s. I got him when he was 6 weeks old. He died at 16+ years old. We went through a lot together, from heartbreak to painful job losses to my struggle with emotional pain and panic disorder.

          When he died, I was devastated. He was my 'child', and there he was, at the vet's office being put down. I didn't even have the courage to be with him (which creates incredible guilt in me today that I couldn't be there for him). My partner went for me, which was good because Nikki was very close to him, so I know he was with someone who loved him.

          The emotional grief I went through leading to that moment of his death was indescribable. I paced the floor, prayed, begged, sobbed uncontrollably. I'd never cried so hard in my entire life.

          And then, all of a sudden, a tremendous peace came over me and I felt surrounded by an overpowering love. It was a very bizarre feeling, to go from such devastation and distress to peace and love showering down on me. It only lasted for a matter of seconds, and then all the torment returned. What did come to mind, however, was that "that's what life is all about - love!" And I believed that the love is what carries over to the next world that awaits us.

          When my partner returned from the vet's, I asked him what time Nikki had been put down. It was 8 p.m. - EXACTLY when I had that sensation of love and peace.

          I like to think that for those few seconds, I was getting some residual flow from the space that opened up for Nikki to pass over. I suppose I was really with him in spirit at that very moment.

          To this day, I'm convinced that something special happened to include me when he died. I believe I got a tiny glimpse of what we'll experience when we die - we'll enter a world of overwhelming love and peace.

          Since getting involved in this thread, I've done even more thinking about the idea of death, and today it hit me. In part, because of some things I've had to do lately to overcome my fears.

          Accept death. They say that when people die, they go peacefully because they have accepted it.

          There's one alternative to acceptance and that is to try to fight it, which of course we can't do. As soon as we learn to accept it, the fear will subside.

          Lately, I've actually felt much better accepting that I will die one day - in part, because of the thoughts that this thread has elicited in me.

          Thank you, Justin, for having the courage to post it.

          Sylvia
          I just want to say thank you Sylvia

          Your response really caught my attention. When you talk about that sudden sensation of love, I have felt the same thing. Your response made me cry and even while typing this I'm sobbing lol.

          Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. I can absolutely relate to what you went through, multiple times (sadly).

          I hope you have a wonderful day, wonderful week, wonderful year, and above all, a wonderfully awesome life.

          Again thank you.
          Signature

          My name is Justin Lewis. My digital marketing company has been in business for over 10 years with multiple six-figure years. We do provide a premium web design service.

          {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4941709].message }}
          • Profile picture of the author sylviad
            Originally Posted by Justin Lewis View Post

            I just want to say thank you Sylvia

            Your response really caught my attention. When you talk about that sudden sensation of love, I have felt the same thing. Your response made me cry and even while typing this I'm sobbing lol.

            Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. I can absolutely relate to what you went through, multiple times (sadly).

            I hope you have a wonderful day, wonderful week, wonderful year, and above all, a wonderfully awesome life.

            Again thank you.
            Oddly, the subsequent times I've grieved for lost loved ones I have not had this same experience as I did with Nikki. Perhaps because I'd never grieved before he died. Shortly after (a few months later) my mother died. I accepted that she was going to be happy and comfortable - because in this world she had become quite depressed and suffered one small stroke after another. She just was not happy. I prayed for God to just let her go if it's her time. And He did.

            It might be that I was still grieving for Nikki at that time and had nothing left for her. Or as I said, I knew it was her time and I accepted it, consequently not feeling that horrid grief.

            The last time, when I was informed my partner had been found dead, it did hit me hard. But by that time, he was already dead so I did not have a chance to focus on his dying moments as I did with Nikki. So, no concentrated feelings as with Nikki which probably put me in the right spiritual place to experience that love the first time. And it wasn't any love I've ever experienced before. Very powerful and quite overwhelming, as you probably know.

            Some people who are somewhat psychic do sense when someone they love is dying. I guess I'm not very psychic.

            Sylvia
            Signature
            :: Got a dog? Visit my blog. Dog Talk Weekly
            :: Writing, Audio Transcription Services? - Award-winning Journalist is taking new projects. Warrior Discounts!
            {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4941884].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Michael Ten
    "I'm afraid that I might not wake up on a bed made out of diamonds."
    -Approximate Quote From MTV Riff Raff (Diamond Child is the song that the lyrics were rapped it.)

    That is all.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4902857].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Puusaari
    I am scared that I am going to die and my two year old son will never get to know me.

    I am scared that I am going to die and my wife will struggle to raise him on her own without me.

    I am scared that I am going to die and my family will lose everything since I am the main income producer and I have yet to save much for the future being 29 years of age.

    When I think of death, those are my fears.

    I have never shared these fears with anyone before but felt compelled to here.

    What I do when I have these fears is I acknowledge them, accept them and then release them. I turn those thoughts into my motivation to work harder or to enjoy my time with my family more. I use those thoughts as my wake up call that I need to seize the moment no matter how small or insignificant that it may seem. In the end, my fear is my driving force to live life to the fullest.

    I wish you all the best in your journeys.

    I am grateful that you have posted thread. I am sure that it will help a lot of people with a touchy and very personal type of issue.

    I send my prayers to your family. Wishing you much love, peace, happiness and health!
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4903086].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author wilder1047
    My mom used to literally cry herself to sleep at nights in fear of dying. For no real reason - there was no death around us, she was not sick at the time... she was just that scared of dying.

    A few years ago she had surgery for a blood clot in her lung, which led to more complications and more surgeries - she ended up with a very large incision along the lower part of her abdomen.

    To make the situation even better, she had a psychopath husband who was threatening her while she was in hospital - we spoke to the doctors and managed to have her discharged.

    This was on Christmas Eve. She was in her bedroom sleeping while I was in another room in the house watching TV.

    I didn't hear anything, but for some reason I decided to go and see if she was alright.. When I opened the door she was lying on her back on the ground with her hands on her lower abdomen and calmly told me to call the ambulance.

    Which I did.

    After being admitted in hospital for a couple nights a lady came into her room in the hospital and started asking her questions.. Which, after a while, led my mom to ask what the lady was even there for..

    The lady simply said, "we come in and help people who have had near death experiences..."

    My mom had NO clue she almost died. What had happened was she got up to go to the washroom - fainted, and the incision in her stomach had ripped open... and apparently since that event she has completely come to terms with dying.

    Apparently it was the most peaceful and relaxing moment in her life.

    When you consider it - the only sure thing that happens in life.. is death. Thanks to evolution - its probably been made into a pretty painless experience.

    Maybe you should fear the next time you get up and go to the washroom in the middle of night.. and stub your toe... Cause your body sure as heck hasn't made that experience any better!!
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4903468].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Haso
    Dear Justin,

    I'm sorry for your father's illness, and for all of your losses. Beyond the grief, each loss chains into earlier losses, amplifies everything you're feeling, and can really, really debilitate you.

    My mother, father, brother, and sister are gone - my sister died a year ago in June. I am the last remaining member of my immediate family. When my sister died, even though I was mourning her and trying to process her difficult illness, I started to think I was next, and was fearful of dying.

    Today the fear of dying isn't foremost in my mind. I wondered why all of my immediate family had to die (at relatively young ages - mother & father in 50s, brother 43, sister 61. (I'm in my 50s). And I'm doing OK. I miss them, and I put one foot in front of the other to get through the day, and I'm doing OK - a far cry from 16 months ago when my sister died.

    Loss is painful. There can be times when it seems like it never ends. It gets better. I promise you this.

    I've come to the conclusion, for myself and the loss of my family members, that the "why" doesn't matter, I can't change it, so I don't torment myself about it. I can do is to be the best me that I can be, love and appreciate the people in my life, and try to think kindly of my dearly departed, and hope they forgive me when unkind thoughts rear their ugly heads.

    I wish you Godspeed, healing, a long life, and a happy life, regardless how long. Be good to your father, support him through this transition. You will never regret it. I send good thoughts your way.

    Joan
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4915683].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Robert Michael
    I know I will probably catch some hell, but everybody has to die sometime. Just try to live your life to the fullest, dont have any regrets. Its better to try and fail than never try and wonder what might have been..

    Live each day like it could be your last, because trust me, it could. Tomorrow isn't guaranteed. As for the "after-life" LOL don't get me started..

    I might not believe in "god" but I DO believe in karma. You get what you put in.. What goes around comes around.. ya know?

    I just try to do good things and help people when I can. Even if I dont know them.

    Sorry to hear about all the problems, but I have also experienced these things. My cousin hung himself just 2 years ago. My grandma died this year. My grandpa is sure to follow soon, since he has basically been holding on to life just to care for my grandma..

    So ya.. nothing we can do but remember the good times we had..

    Life goes on.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4915709].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Jarrod
    Justin,
    I'm not sure of your personal beliefs, but wanted to share a thought from the Bible hoping it would be of some benefit to you.

    It comes from John 11. This is where Jesus raises Lazarus from the dead. Jesus, knowing good and well what he was going to do, was nevertheless emotional. In fact it's one of the only three places in scripture it says he wept.

    My point in all this is twofold:

    1-I personally believe with all my heart that physical death is not the end, and there is a bigger picture to our existence beyond what we see.

    2-Even having faith in that, it is still important to realize the sorrows of the here and now, to share in the pain of others and help give and receive comfort.

    I'll say a prayer for you and your family. Wish you all the best bro.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4940976].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
    Banned
    When I think about all my love for The World and my love for my Family, I feel at peace about dying.

    Steve Pavlina (StevePavlina.com) said that a Man should share his love with the World otherwise “death” will haunt him.

    I'm not sure if I've shared all my love with The World however for some reason I'm not afraid of death - even if it means that I'll “disappear.”
    Signature
    "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4941238].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author sylviad
    I agree 100% - in fact, I wouldn't be surprised if less than half the population believes it. I guess we'll all find out one day.
    Signature
    :: Got a dog? Visit my blog. Dog Talk Weekly
    :: Writing, Audio Transcription Services? - Award-winning Journalist is taking new projects. Warrior Discounts!
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4941652].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
      Banned
      Originally Posted by sylviad View Post

      I agree 100% - in fact, I wouldn't be surprised if less than half the population believes it. I guess we'll all find out one day.
      Until then, enjoy the ride.
      Signature
      "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4941680].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Justin Says
    To everyone whom has commented on this thread so far. Thank you all for being so great. It's nice to have others that are there by my side. Even if it is in a virtual world. You are all amazing people and never forget that.

    I do want to note that I did go through some trouble the other day.

    I was playing racquetball with a friend, when all of a sudden I had this extreme migrane, it came out of no where and even though I thought I was running, my friend told me I wasn't even moving. It was quite scary, so I went out and sat down for about 5 minutes. Then I grabbed a drink of water, came back, played half way through a match and then had to run to the bathroom.

    When I got to the bathroom it hurt.. (not to be too descriptive). I told my friend, mom, dad, other friends, and everyone else and they think I might have kidney stones or a bladder infection. So I plan on going to patient first (hospital) tomorrow to get a quick checkup. I'm really hoping that I am alright, but just to be on the safe side I have been drinking a lot of water, cranberry juice, and grapefruit juice.

    To make matters worse one of my friends (friends), passed away a few days ago from tripping over a glass table and cutting an artery.

    I do accept that fact that we all die at one point in our lives, but it's still a bit haunting to think that it could be right around the corner.

    I wish everyone the best of health. Just remember.. do what makes you happy. If you aren't happy, change something. You might not have another chance.
    Signature

    My name is Justin Lewis. My digital marketing company has been in business for over 10 years with multiple six-figure years. We do provide a premium web design service.

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4941746].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author Jonathan 2.0
      Banned
      Hi Justin.

      Recently (a few days ago) I thought I could be having the onset of a heart attack or stroke. (Had pains in my chest.)

      After a couple of days suffering I realized that I had probably pulled a muscle somewhere when I was being sick from a night out.
      Today I'm 100% back to normal.

      So I suppose the point is that even though it's a good idea to seek medical advice also understand that it could be something minor. Sorry I can't be more help.
      Signature
      "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity."―Joseph Sugarman
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4941786].message }}
    • Profile picture of the author WebTrafficFusion
      Just a quick comment on your Dad if it helps. My Dad has just been through major colon surgery due to a massive growth that had to be removed as it was completely blocking "normal digestive operations". When we got the news we were devasted, never good to hear that someone close is ill especially when its the dreaded C word!

      But the things they can do these days are more than amazing and the success rates of this type of surgery are very high. Despite being nearly 80 he got through the op ok and has even had the all clear on the biopsy on the surrounding tissue and bloods.

      Of course the next few months/years mean tests and observations and keeping an eye on things but hopefully you can take solace from our experience knowing its not always a bad outcome with this type of condition.
      {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4941924].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author gorvene
    It is normal to fear death based upon what’s going on in your family’s life Justin. I feel for you and I do hope you keep the faith strong and find the strength and courage to overcome your fear. I would suggest you pray to God to remove your fear and believe me he’ll come to your rescue. Sometimes we go through troubles in our lives for a reason we do not yet understand. Try to find some meaning out of your pain though.

    God Bless,
    Dean
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4941847].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author dacahe
    It's not really death you are afraid off, what you are really afraid of is the unknown.

    As the good bard (William Shakespeare) said:
    The undiscover'd country from whose bourn
    No traveller returns, puzzles the will
    And makes us rather bear those ills we have
    Than fly to others that we know not of?
    Thus conscience does make cowards of us all


    Save for a few that have died and come back to life, we don't really know what is going on over the fence after -we have shuffled off this mortal coil (yup Willy again )
    And most of them speak of a place of unimaginable love, beauty and peace, pure joy is what most describe.
    I know for myself that when I have Out of Body Experiences at night, it is a wild an awesome place outside the body and more importantly, there is life outside the body.

    Let me ask you this, what if after death we have the best experience we could ever imagine? would death be a bad proposition?

    Me personally, since death is a certain thing for all, I am not too concern of when it's going to happen, it will come when I'm done with life, the present is all I care about because it's the only real perception, the rest is a hallucination of the mind.

    Don't concern yourself with death, occupy yourself with life.
    Signature

    Do not use affiliate links in signatures

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4943055].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author hireava
    I'm sorry to hear about what happened in your family Justin. I can't blame you if you feel afraid of death. But keep in mind that fear has nothing to do you anything good. Be grateful that you're still have the chance to be with your friends and love ones. Just enjoy and live your life to the fullest.
    Signature
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4943485].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Justin Says
    Again thank you all for being so nice.

    I am heading to my dads today to make sure he is doing well and to spend some time with him I'll probably take him out to lunch. Great thing about working online is the fact that I can actually do that for once...
    Signature

    My name is Justin Lewis. My digital marketing company has been in business for over 10 years with multiple six-figure years. We do provide a premium web design service.

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4946955].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Rohm
    Quote (forgotten source): What you focus on EXPANDS.

    So, change the focus.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4958663].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author abrahamgpg
    Fear is a Faith killer. Please do not let that happen to you.

    I know we are all just human beings, but that is not the whole truth. In fact we are all spiritual beings inside a human body.

    I live for the day in Revealtions 20. If my body dies before that time, I still know I will be able to see and be what God wants me to see and be.

    Regards to your father.
    Signature
    Live each day as if it are your last day.

    Online Marketing Tips at Abraham's Tips.com.
    Marketers need to be trustworthy.
    Get your TRUST verified SEAL here.
    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4965655].message }}
  • Profile picture of the author Kaysa
    Great video.

    I'm sorry to hear all these bad things that have happened to your family, but in life there are ups and downs to live it fully.

    Thanks for sharing your experience.
    Signature

    Do you want to become a successful Persuasion Master? Learn Persuasion Skills to get anything that you want in your life.

    http://getpersuasionskills.com/

    {{ DiscussionBoard.errors[4971794].message }}

Trending Topics