A Key to Happiness: "Practice" Not Worrying

56 replies
Worry is one of the biggest obstacles to a happy, contented life. Many people get worry and caring mixed up. Some feel if you don't worry you don't care. But there's a stark difference between the two.

Worrying is agonizing over something you can't control. Caring is doing all you can to solve the problem. Then refusing to agonize or stress about the problem any further.

This often takes practice. Some people can do this naturally, but it takes practice for most of us.

When faced with a problem or obstacle follow what I call the triple A's.
They'll help you deal with them without worrying. Facing your problems and using the 3 A's is an excellent way to practice not worrying.

Here's how to practice not worrying using the 3 A's:

1. Ask
Ask yourself what or who's available to assist me with advice, resources, information or a listening ear. Having these at my disposal have worked to save me from needless worry on many occasions.

2. Assemble
The next step is to assemble or organize any advice, information or assistance you've gathered. It's surprising how simply getting and staying organized can put problems in perspective and calm worries.

3. Action
This final step will do more to melt worries away than anything. Taking action is the key to banishing worry, even if it's a small action. Worry tends to fester and grow in an atmosphere of inaction. As the popular saying goes "do the thing and you'll have the power".

It's estimated 75% of things people worry about never happens, and if it does it's never as bad as imagined. The other 25% is beyond your control anyway, so worrying won't make a difference.

So, practice not worrying until it becomes a habit. That's one of the most productive things you can do to achieve happiness no matter what life hands you.
#happiness #key #practice #worrying
  • Profile picture of the author danlew
    I certainly agree with all of this. We all know that it really takes time to master the method that we are trying right now, so practice makes perfect. You will commit mistakes in the first place, but don't worry it's only normal. Just learn from it and keep practicing till you master the whole thing. But the most important of all is to take action....
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  • Profile picture of the author webworm
    Yeah i totally agree with your view.Also happiness is deserve to those who are mentally prepared to define everything simply.
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    • Profile picture of the author The Niche Man
      Originally Posted by webworm View Post

      Yeah i totally agree with your view.Also happiness is deserve to those who are mentally prepared to define everything simply.
      Yes, mental prepartion is a big part achieving happiness. I believe it was President Lincoln who said "A person is as happy as they make up their minds to be." I like that because that means happiness is under our control and our personal responsibility not others.
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  • Profile picture of the author Michael Ten
    Is it time to worry if one cannot put a roof over their head?
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  • Profile picture of the author Jim Guererro
    I totally agree with the principles set forth in not worrying. Worry can affect mood, happiness and productivity. Getting physically active doing anything from walking, riding a bicycle to playing a sport can take your mind off worrying.

    Practice thwarting off worry by doing something else.
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  • Profile picture of the author pmg2712
    Hey loved your post..
    And I just thought I will create something for my situation
    I am worrying for my earning and starting a business so here something might be helpful for the readers.
    Worrying over your earning will be like thinking about earning from sources which are not in your hands.
    Instead care for your business so you will know what to look for earning that extra buck
    and all you can do for it.
    so there are three simple As

    Ask- Ask for the resouces and information and investors are there for my venture, seek assistance and get your querries fulfilled.

    Assemble- all the information you have got from your resources. The money you have got from your investors the employees ready to work for you and the concept you want to work on.

    &

    Take action about all the above things and you will simply care for your venture instead of worrying about the business.

    Hehe it might be lil stupid but I just thought will be helpful

    Thanks.
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    • Profile picture of the author The Niche Man
      Originally Posted by pmg2712 View Post

      Hey loved your post..
      And I just thought I will create something for my situation
      I am worrying for my earning and starting a business so here something might be helpful for the readers.
      Worrying over your earning will be like thinking about earning from sources which are not in your hands.
      Instead care for your business so you will know what to look for earning that extra buck
      and all you can do for it.
      so there are three simple As

      Ask- Ask for the resouces and information and investors are there for my venture, seek assistance and get your querries fulfilled.

      Assemble- all the information you have got from your resources. The money you have got from your investors the employees ready to work for you and the concept you want to work on.

      &

      Take action about all the above things and you will simply care for your venture instead of worrying about the business.

      Hehe it might be lil stupid but I just thought will be helpful

      Thanks.
      Thanks, you made a powerful point. When you take the 3 A's (Ask, Assemble and Action) the positive angles are limitless in scope. Limited only by your imagination.
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  • Profile picture of the author Rick Wagoner
    Some great advice! Thanks for sharing.

    Rick
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    • Profile picture of the author Simon Nugam
      "A person is as happy as they make up their minds to be." I love that quote. Puts me back to taking responsibility for my own happiness, going beyond blame and guilt.

      The circumstances are as they are, with us worrying about them - or not. And have circumstances ever gotten better by worrying? Probably not, but maybe the worrying has a tendency to influence the circumstance in just the way we fear...

      I'm good at worrying. Sometimes I do it more, sometimes less.

      For me, it has to do with trust.
      The more I trust, the less I worry. But know and feel that everything is right the way it is and will be right - even not knowing how it's going to be.

      What helps me when worrying, is believing that my exact situation and exact current experience is most conducive to growth and learning... that gives me trust as well... to believe that there is a reason for it to be as it is, otherwise it wouldn't be as it is.

      May we all be worry-free.
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  • Profile picture of the author hifrend
    worry is needed to avoid bad thing happend, but dont to much worry about anything. keep balance and simple.
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  • Profile picture of the author Absolute Logo
    I couldn't agree with your post more! Well said!
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  • Profile picture of the author sophiebond
    Worrying will do you no good, it will just give way for more negative thoughts.
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  • Profile picture of the author leorocking25
    I like your posting very much...We know that worrying doesn't give us any solution but we love to worry as like as a foolish....i am totally agree with your concept.i htink following triple A's we can say goodbye to worryng...
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  • Profile picture of the author Mary Wilhite
    Worrying is a habit. And I guess there are people who worry that they are not worrying. The habit can be so strong that it will require a strong will to break it.

    One must monitor his or her thought process, casting out any shed of doubt or worry. If you can do it for 21 days or more, then you will start becoming a master of your own destiny. You will conquer worry, poor self esteem and things you thought were impossible will be within reach.
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    • Profile picture of the author Tautua
      Hey, my first time here but it is interesting. It is a breathe of fresh word. This is cool. Well well! I love the story about not to worry. I love to implement in my life style and for sure teach the children while they are still young not to worry.
      I will do it, what about being worry is a critical part of our nuance as human being. Its just a thought, if we take it away what will push us to do something?
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      • Profile picture of the author The Niche Man
        Originally Posted by Tautua View Post

        if we take it away what will push us to do something?
        • Our Passion!
        • Self-motivation!
        • The desire to serve!
        • The desire to make a difference!
        • Our survival instinct.
        ... should I go on?
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        • Profile picture of the author Tautua
          Thanks, but how did someone arrive in all those great inspirational nuances. I wonder if there is a connection with something that challenged the attempt...thank you Niche Man
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    • Profile picture of the author The Niche Man
      Originally Posted by Mary Wilhite View Post

      Worrying is a habit. And I guess there are people who worry that they are not worrying. The habit can be so strong that it will require a strong will to break it.

      One must monitor his or her thought process, casting out any shed of doubt or worry. If you can do it for 21 days or more, then you will start becoming a master of your own destiny. You will conquer worry, poor self esteem and things you thought were impossible will be within reach.
      Hmm! 21 days sounds like a good challenge. Can it be done?

      - Big competitors moving in on my niche?
      - Customers demanding more for less money?
      - Son's college tuition hike again?

      Stay tuned.
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  • Profile picture of the author hireava
    Very insightful post! It's hard not to worry about something that is very important for you but with your 3 A's of how not to worry, I think it may help. Thanks a lot!
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    • Profile picture of the author hirithk
      hai
      i agree with what you have mentioned. life will be frustated when we lose all. when we care if we dint get love means what is the use. trust plays main role. trust is should be their. if we belive in ourself and, if we get care or love from some one who is nearer to us then only we can be happy.
      thank u
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  • Profile picture of the author emrom
    Worrying only makes you feel sick. I want to feel good and have all my strength ready to respond...what ever the need. Worrying drains your strength.
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  • Profile picture of the author jbthemummy
    Awesome thread! Being a human rules because we already have all the answers, we just need to break it down into steps like you mentioned. NICE!
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  • Profile picture of the author Richard Brands
    Hi, I completely agree with the post. Just worrying on mistakes,which happen in past, make feel down. Practice makes perfection. Need to be careful about No-repeats of previous mistakes.
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  • Profile picture of the author David Sneen
    I prefer to focus on the positive. Practice constructive worrying. i.e. planning. Keep planning your IM path. Keep worrying--that is constructive worrying, so that you will reach your goals.
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    • Profile picture of the author Larry Carter
      Worrying is just being human and a hard habit to break. It will take away from your physical and mental energy and I try to take a deep breath and try to stay positive.
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    • Profile picture of the author The Niche Man
      Originally Posted by David Sneen View Post

      I prefer to focus on the positive. Practice constructive worrying. i.e. planning. Keep planning your IM path. Keep worrying--that is constructive worrying, so that you will reach your goals.
      Constructive Worrying. That sounds like a title for a new book. Hmm.
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  • Profile picture of the author therenegadeleader
    Originally Posted by The Niche Man View Post

    So, practice not worrying until it becomes a habit.
    Quote to ponder.
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  • Profile picture of the author rubywylie
    great thread
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  • Profile picture of the author eguinan
    Thank you for the thread! I agree. Worrying doesn't help ANYTHING. It usually adds confusion to the situation for me until I don't know what to do.

    Worrying was a very hard habit for me to break though. I wasn't sure how to use my mental energy if I wasn't busy worrying. Now I try to stay "in the moment". If I'm regretting the past or worrying about the future, I am not here NOW and unable to see the present opportunities.
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    • Profile picture of the author The Niche Man
      Originally Posted by eguinan View Post

      If I'm regretting the past or worrying about the future, I am not here NOW and unable to see the present opportunities.
      Woh! Sounds like you were reading my mail about 20 years ago. I shudder to think how many opportunities I walked pass becasue my brain was clouded with worry.

      When I decided to practice not worrying everyday, I'm automatically seeing opportunities because it helps keep my head clear. That alone is priceless.
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  • Profile picture of the author deborahcrowley
    nice video share
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  • Profile picture of the author IMHunter
    I agree! Thanks for sharing.
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  • Profile picture of the author Stoney
    You might find it interesting that the Bible tells us to Ask; Seek; and Knock, very similar to your steps. The Good Book also tells us that worrying will not add a single hair to our head or another day to our lives (in fact, the opposite is more likely!) When worry starts, get it out of your head by writing it down or talking it over with someone who supports your efforts but won't "tell you what you should do."
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    • Profile picture of the author The Niche Man
      Originally Posted by Stoney View Post

      When worry starts, get it out of your head by writing it down or talking it over with someone who supports your efforts but won't "tell you what you should do."
      That's a valuable idea. We don't always have someone we can share all of our problems with ... all the time. A healthy way to vent or even brainstorm for solutions is to write, write ,write.
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  • Profile picture of the author jenniferturner
    worthy post....
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  • Profile picture of the author AlisonTaylor
    I recommend Dale Carnegies How To Stop Worrying And Start Living. It's simple stuff, which Daleadmits, but it helped me to stop worrying as much. I think this is a good book for people who have moderate worry. I don't think it could really help a person who is severely depressed or anxious. If you want to stop worrying, you can, and this book helps you to do it.
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    • Profile picture of the author The Niche Man
      Originally Posted by AlisonTaylor View Post

      I recommend Dale Carnegies How To Stop Worrying And Start Living. It's simple stuff, which Daleadmits, but it helped me to stop worrying as much. I think this is a good book for people who have moderate worry. I don't think it could really help a person who is severely depressed or anxious. If you want to stop worrying, you can, and this book helps you to do it.
      Thanks for the reminder, my big sister has that book, I think I'll borrow it
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  • Profile picture of the author zelgly2
    You have written a superb post. Yes i do agree with you. Stop worrying and live your life happily. live every moment of your life because you cannot get it back. always have some close friends with whom you can share things and they will definitely come when you are in trouble. so stop worrying.
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  • Profile picture of the author dagnyjbarber
    Totally agree with this post.
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  • Thanks so much, that was a great post and something I've been very focused on for the last few months. At a point when I found myself at my lowest due to worry, legitimate worry, but worry all the same, I knew I needed to find a way to claw myself back to the surface. I started researching online and came across so many useful systems to turn it around.

    I'm not a religious person, but I found a sense of spirituality that really helped me think differently. I was naturally someone who always saw the cup as half full, so this came pretty easily for me when I made a conscious decision to look on the sunny side of life.

    I wanted to list some of the processes I use that I find helpful in the hope that they will help someone else out there. I hope no-one minds.

    - One of the really simple things you can do, is when worrying about something, right then in that moment, ask yourself, what positive outcome is coming from my worrying about this. The answer will always be 'none'. So why do it. This is not to be confused with caring as The Niche Man said, and not to be confused with being proactive, that is different, but worry is all about the negative and that helps no-one.
    - I keep an appreciation journal, I write in it every night before I go to sleep. It helps keep things in perspective. Appreciation is different to gratitude by the way. To appreciate is to see it in the positive, whereas gratitude is seeing it in the negative, in the way that you should feel grateful that something has or hasn't happened to you. The difference is subtle, but there.
    - I practice the law of attraction. A big part of that is the belief that I am in charge of my own story, just as everyone else is in charge of theirs. If you don't like your story, re-write it.
    - I know the things that make me feel Joy and I keep my focus on them. I don't care who you are and what your story is, everyone has or can find something in their lives that brings them joy. For me its my son, my husband, my family, my pets. But it can be something as simple as looking at the colours of the trees in autumn. Watching the movie 'I AM' will point out to you that if a guy who lives in a shelter that is open to the weather on 2 sides can find joy in hearing his child call his name when he arrives home from work, then so can the rest of us. (its a great film by Tom Shadyac)
    - Finally, if you really, really feel that you don't have any of those things, then in the very least, find something to make you laugh, even if its only for 5 minutes. For me jumping on youtube and watching funny stuff from the Ellen DeGeneres show totally cracks me up and that's enough to change my head space.

    I hope these ideas helped someone out there. Its a topic I'm very passionate about and I'm really happy I stumbled across the post so that I could contribute.

    Thanks again Niche Man.
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    • Profile picture of the author The Niche Man
      Originally Posted by Brooke@wadeswrittenword View Post

      Thanks so much, that was a great post and something I've been very focused on for the last few months. At a point when I found myself at my lowest due to worry, legitimate worry, but worry all the same, I knew I needed to find a way to claw myself back to the surface. I started researching online and came across so many useful systems to turn it around.

      I'm not a religious person, but I found a sense of spirituality that really helped me think differently. I was naturally someone who always saw the cup as half full, so this came pretty easily for me when I made a conscious decision to look on the sunny side of life.

      I wanted to list some of the processes I use that I find helpful in the hope that they will help someone else out there. I hope no-one minds.

      - One of the really simple things you can do, is when worrying about something, right then in that moment, ask yourself, what positive outcome is coming from my worrying about this. The answer will always be 'none'. So why do it. This is not to be confused with caring as The Niche Man said, and not to be confused with being proactive, that is different, but worry is all about the negative and that helps no-one.
      - I keep an appreciation journal, I write in it every night before I go to sleep. It helps keep things in perspective. Appreciation is different to gratitude by the way. To appreciate is to see it in the positive, whereas gratitude is seeing it in the negative, in the way that you should feel grateful that something has or hasn't happened to you. The difference is subtle, but there.
      - I practice the law of attraction. A big part of that is the belief that I am in charge of my own story, just as everyone else is in charge of theirs. If you don't like your story, re-write it.
      - I know the things that make me feel Joy and I keep my focus on them. I don't care who you are and what your story is, everyone has or can find something in their lives that brings them joy. For me its my son, my husband, my family, my pets. But it can be something as simple as looking at the colours of the trees in autumn. Watching the movie 'I AM' will point out to you that if a guy who lives in a shelter that is open to the weather on 2 sides can find joy in hearing his child call his name when he arrives home from work, then so can the rest of us. (its a great film by Tom Shadyac)
      - Finally, if you really, really feel that you don't have any of those things, then in the very least, find something to make you laugh, even if its only for 5 minutes. For me jumping on youtube and watching funny stuff from the Ellen DeGeneres show totally cracks me up and that's enough to change my head space.

      I hope these ideas helped someone out there. Its a topic I'm very passionate about and I'm really happy I stumbled across the post so that I could contribute.

      Thanks again Niche Man.
      Excellent points, especially creating an appreciation journal. Many billionaires, including Oprah Winfrey, Donald Trump and J.K Rowland swear by them, and credit creating one with turning their life and fortunes around during dark times in their lives. Sometimes simple things like that can make the biggest differences.
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  • Profile picture of the author Repins
    Great advice & I totally agree, thank you for the share!
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    "Help enough people get what they want and you will also get what you want" Zig Zigla

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  • Profile picture of the author lbradshaw
    I had a friend growing up who's mom had a refridgerator magnet that said, "Don't tell me not to worry. Things I worry about never happen." As if worrying about something magically makes the problem go away. I find I feel soooo much better about everything when I just make the decision to stop worrying about it! Not to mention the fact that when you spend too much time worrying about something you can literally shut down and become completely unproductive. That is no good...
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    • Profile picture of the author dtone
      I like your definition of the difference between worrying and caring.
      I think the Ask action is really important too - I would even add that you could ask if there was a different way of looking at the problem.
      As most of the worrying is about events that never happen we could try and change the perspective onto an outcome that wouldn't need worrying about.
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    • Profile picture of the author The Niche Man
      Originally Posted by lbradshaw View Post

      Not to mention the fact that when you spend too much time worrying about something you can literally shut down and become completely unproductive. That is no good...
      That reminds me of an experience I witnessed today. A friend of mine worried so much about a recent marketing mistake so much she forgot to do simple things to correct it. Thus, making the mistake worse than it should have been.
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  • Profile picture of the author gentryliving
    Definitely! I agree and i would like to share this to my friend too. Thanks for sharing!
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  • Profile picture of the author robert88
    Not any not necessarily but. Providing you have your overall health, you happen to be within your correct intellect therefore you contain the Soldier Community. You're ready to go!
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  • Profile picture of the author robert88
    We fully go along with the ideas established in not really having to worry. Fret could affect mood, contentment as well as productiveness. Having literally effective doing something coming from jogging, cycling some sort of pedal bike to playing a sport can take your head away having to worry.

    Training thwarting away get worried by doing something more important. Can it be time and energy to get worried when a single can't placed some sort of roofing above the mind?
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  • Profile picture of the author eguinan
    Thank you for sharing! Great post!
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