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In the past

by omtatsat
9 replies
I used to think that the closer I got to my goal and what I wanted the painful it'd become, the more focused and perfect I'd have to be to cross the threshold into perfection, glory, and success... and it used to really feel like either transcendence (in the case of success) or obliteration, annihilation, and death if in the clutch moment I wasn't fully present and/or conscious of everything. It was a really stressful, impossible, and nearly hopeless way of looking at and moving towards things: wanting things so very much and then feeling so frightened in the important final moments like it was salvation or destruction, and usually running away from the situation to relax/ease myself into calm once again.

How can I 'enjoy' moving towards the things I like, enjoying the process of growth rather than thinking in terms of clutch moments of salvation vs. destruction, and feel good about the entire process and journey, especially where I am now and being ok improving and being ok with imperfection now in the moment?

Thanks and all the best
#metaprogram #motivation #past #values
  • Profile picture of the author Odahh
    hello ,

    the thing about a goal.. is the goal the real goal or is it a representation of some condition you would have ..to have the goal.

    I'va had a goal of getting my weight down..because the chart says i am close to 80 pounds over weight ..well it was seventy ..

    so lower weight meant healtier more vital..what ever .

    but my body desided to pack on muscle..and in the last month that muscle has gotten much more dense ..and everyone says i am looking good .

    recently my belly has started shrinking ..but my weight has gone up a few pounds .

    now i can step on a scale and declare total defeat .. or i can enjoy the new muscle tone .. the fact most of the cronic pain i was in is gone and that i like looking in a mirror now.

    now i have a bigger goal with my life ..that has had to be fleshed out to where i have multiple progressive steps i can take to get there ..
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    • Profile picture of the author omtatsat
      Originally Posted by Odahh View Post


      the thing about a goal.. is the goal the real goal or is it a representation of some condition you would have ..to have the goal.
      I guess it's partly a representation of some condition because this goal would spring-board me into new and multitudinous more goals.

      And more specifically I want to know how to be less of a person with fire burning my ass into action (away) and being more eating cake along the path to my goal (towards).
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  • Profile picture of the author Odahh
    Originally Posted by omtatsat View Post

    How can I 'enjoy' moving towards the things I like, enjoying the process of growth rather than thinking in terms of clutch moments of salvation vs. destruction, and feel good about the entire process and journey, especially where I am now and being ok improving and being ok with imperfection now in the moment?

    Thanks and all the best
    it is hard to explain but every big goal worth doing.. has many points where you must grow from what you are no .. to a certain point ..and it is only after growth in many areas ..the big goal is attainable

    now if you grow in many areas ..but not enough to attain a goal.. sometimes onces you know where you can grow and where growth isn't important for you.. you can set goal that more accurately mirror the growth you desire .
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  • Profile picture of the author Odahh
    reread what i wrote ,
    to get to big goals..you have to achieve many much smaller goals ..if you have your rewards structure set up to celebrate achieving these smaller goals..rather than just simply moving on to the next goal to work on .

    break a big goal down to many little goals and reward yourself each time on is reached
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    • Profile picture of the author omtatsat
      Thanks that's really helpful.
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      • Profile picture of the author LastingLifeSuccess
        I don't know how one can avoid the presence of these extreme feelings when undertaking a campaign that so much time, research, and work has gone into. I would think you weren't human if you didn't feel like you would if you had to speak to a group of 10,000 people in a grand stadium and totally uncertain as to the outcome.

        I wish you the best of luck with these enormous feelings of triumph or dread. In the end you will witness your way through it all. Not much solace I know.

        LLS
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  • Profile picture of the author desley
    Very interesting questions to a situation that many people potentially find themselves in.
    I think you're on the right track re imperfection. For many years as a young adult I felt I had to be a perfectionist and if I didn't get things just right then of course I had failed.
    Until I realised that I am perfect in my imperfection. This changed everything around and the course of my overall life.
    In response to how to enjoy the process, a couple of strategies I would suggest are:

    Start each day with writing: I'm happy, excited and grateful I AM ............
    This way you're starting the day on a highly positive note and grateful for what you have been given in life. This is a pick me up of the first order I can assure you. You can write as many statements as you like and even include one's that you're working towards.

    At the end of the day, reflect or write down all the good things that you achieved for the day - the little stuff soon turns into big stuff. If you achieved successfully completing a small step write it down. If you have achieved half of the small step then write it down.
    Then ensure you either give yourself a pat on the back or a reward for what you've reflected on.

    There's nothing like giving yourself a nice treat - could be a beer, a nice meal with the family or whatever - doesn't have to cost the earth.

    When you have achieved your hope and dream - give yourself an even larger treat - might be a trip away, taking the family to a restaurant or a great movie or spending a day at a fun park with the kids (if you have kids).

    In order to enjoy life - first we must learn and accept to enjoy ourselves. Have some fun. Think of all the good things in your life and be thankful life has given these to you. Enjoy your moment of success, not matter how small the success is - by rewarding yourself.

    May your successes continue as your undertake your journey of discovery; and journey of hope.
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    Desley
    Connecting People Together.

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  • Profile picture of the author trusodesign
    be a good person. then your future will also be good. believe
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    • Profile picture of the author Devid Farah
      You need to take a step back and not get so wrapped up in the glory of success.

      Success will come and with it will come many new challenges in life.

      That's just the name of the game.

      If you don't want what comes with it, don't go after it.

      I think you will do fine though, you will achieve your goals and your success will continue to grow as you will find new things to chase after.

      Best
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