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[Expletive] Not For The Faint-Hearted

by asamanthinketh
9 replies
Why You Must Be Dangerously Intense In Your Commitment To Your Values and/or Purpose

Today I write my first post on here because I am outraged at all the shit and nonsense we let go by; I know I have been culprit more than a few times and am just as mad at myself as I am at YOU for not smacking me back into my senses!

So, this evening I come home and am eating dinner. My little sister comes out of her room and says she has to puke; she's been up to this for a while now and today I ain't having it. She's crying, my Mom's saying I should let her and all...but I simply am not having it. I tell her to go back to her room, Mom says she should go puke; I send her back inside.

Why? Because, today I wasn't having it. I have determined that this is the last time I am going to accept that kind of behavior from her OR allow anyone to condition to believe that that is normal, acceptable behavior. PERIOD. I am not going to sit by and let what she claims she wants to do, or what other people think I should allow her to do run the show; because at the end of the day, all the benefits and rewards of (or problems arising from) the quality of behavior and action I accept from other people in my life invariably return to me.

Too many times we let unacceptable behavior, actions and situations slip through the cracks of what should otherwise be solid standards & values we have set for ourselves. And it continually beats me, why we do this.

It's total bullshit to claim you believe in something and yet not have the balls to stick to it; to see it through.

Look, here's what I believe:
"I commit fully to whatever I am doing. Come hell or high water, I will see it through. I am a finisher & the Universe will always give me what I want. Period."

Guys, you must be dangerously intense. We must be dangerously captivated by the things we love, the ideals we live for, and the immense pleasure of achieving our desired outcome (which for is to get my first 10,000 subscribers before November 17th, 2014 even though I'm totally new to this).

As related to this story, I am committed to making sure that my beautiful little sister does not grow up with any type of disorder, throwing up every other day because Big Bro was too much of a wuss to give her a little tough love earlier; I refuse to be that guy.

My sister did not throw and she will not throw up. She is currently sat quietly with Mom, watching TV. "How's that for persistence?"

"Never accept sub-par behaviors, actions or situations from anyone. Be absolutely immutable in your well-informed resolve and you will inevitably have you way; you will achieve your desired outcome."

"Conformity is for bitches. Transform; make the Universe work for you according to your resolute desires. Do not chase every yin tide (crying, weak recommendations, shiny object, success-derailing-bait etc.); there's no quicker way to lose focus and miss achievement." **** people and their opinions of what's 'cool', 'how things are done', 'acceptable', 'normal'; crap.

You are not here on Earth to live through other peoples' lenses or their opinion of what acceptable values are. No. You are a creator; you are here to create your own ideals and stick to them whiles wisely evolving (learn, polish, rinse and repeat)

May the Force be with you, as you stay resolute in reaching out to grab your dreams. May the infinite supply of the Universe channel its many blessings into your life, so that opulence becomes the only acceptable reality you know.

Life's too short to be living someone's values, opinions and dreams; you're an original.

Define what you want. Stay sharp; stay focused.
See you at the top!
#expletive #fainthearted
  • Profile picture of the author sandalwood
    Here's a quote from your post:

    Life's too short to be living someone's values, opinions and dreams; you're an original.

    Hmmm, methinks you got your values as a youngster. And as you grew up you modified them to fit you. I don't see how you or anyone else is an original. Life may be to short but you do live someone else's values. Proof: If you haven't murdered anyone you are living someone else's values.

    But, you're an original...
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    • Profile picture of the author Dain Supero
      I commend you for an ambitious first post, and had it been well-thought-out I probably would've thrown you a thanks.

      So this is what you believe, correct?

      "I commit fully to whatever I am doing. Come hell or high water, I will see it through. I am a finisher & the Universe will always give me what I want. Period."

      Perhaps I read too quickly, perhaps I missed something, but I don't see what that has to do with you telling your sister what to do or how to be. Isn't that sort of cutting the legs out from under your live-life-how-you-want-it motto?

      Oh wait, that's your sister, so you were just being big brother. But when your mother asked you to comply, wasn't she just being your mother?

      I won't ask how old you are, because to be honest age doesn't mean shit. I can, however, sense from your writing that your state of mind is quite young and naive. Masking that with intensity and magnified opinion-rants is doing just that, masking it.

      A man lives by his principles, yes, but he doesn't care what principles others live by. The Force responds neither to intensity nor to ego. It understands only humble gratitude, harmony, and honesty, and it slaps you in the face (sooner or later) whenever you forget that.

      Much to learn, you have. Trust the Force, you must. Ask the Universe, you can. Control them, you cannot.

      None of what I wrote was meant to patronize. I wrote it only because I too was once young and naive, with thoughts not too different from yours.
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      • Profile picture of the author asamanthinketh
        Originally Posted by Dain Supero View Post

        I commend you for an ambitious first post, and had it been well-thought-out I probably would've thrown you a thanks.

        So this is what you believe, correct?

        "I commit fully to whatever I am doing. Come hell or high water, I will see it through. I am a finisher & the Universe will always give me what I want. Period."

        Perhaps I read too quickly, perhaps I missed something, but I don't see what that has to do with you telling your sister what to do or how to be. Isn't that sort of cutting the legs out from under your live-life-how-you-want-it motto?

        Oh wait, that's your sister, so you were just being big brother. But when your mother asked you to comply, wasn't she just being your mother?

        I won't ask how old you are, because to be honest age doesn't mean shit. I can, however, sense from your writing that your state of mind is quite young and naive. Masking that with intensity and magnified opinion-rants is doing just that, masking it.

        A man lives by his principles, yes, but he doesn't care what principles others live by. The Force responds neither to intensity nor to ego. It understands only humble gratitude, harmony, and honesty, and it slaps you in the face (sooner or later) whenever you forget that.

        Much to learn, you have. Trust the Force, you must. Ask the Universe, you can. Control them, you cannot.

        None of what I wrote was meant to patronize. I wrote it only because I too was once young and naive, with thoughts not too different from yours.
        Hey Dain, what's up. Thanks for your comment! How what I believe connects to my sister is that, because I knew what I wanted and wanted it more than what she wanted, she eventually inherited my strong belief that is was not right for her to be throwing up after every meal.

        I do care what principles others live by, so long I am not harmed in any way (physical, mental or spiritual) by them. Also, I shall not allow anyone under my watch to buy into b.s. believes that eventually harm them; certainly not my beautiful little sister. Outside my watch, care and guidance, they may do whatever they will. I do however trust whatever training and advice I have given them earlier to help them make their own wise, well-informed decisions & will not interfere with their lives there.

        Help those who need your help; guide those mature enough to make their own decisions. Force is never appreciated. Not even when it is founded in the best of intentions. But intense exertion pf powerful influence, which may or may not be construed as force, is sometimes necessary.

        And yes, that was just mom being mom. Just like her wanting to buy this or that when I've already communicated that I'm trying to save money at that time, would just be a wife/girlfriend being a wife/girlfriend. If I do not know what want and want it bad enough, people simply being who they are (good intentions or not) will end up sabotaging my purpose simply because I let them; simply because I let my resolve get derailed by their natural whims.

        I am not pro anti-flexibility, I am pro resolution.

        "Control them, you cannot." - The best of men is like water, Tao Te Ching.

        "Much to learn, you have. Trust the Force, you must. Ask the Universe, you can.". That's very true though bro & I look forward to it.

        Thanks again for taking time to leave your comment! Keep 'em coming, I appreciate the perspectives (definitely making notes).

        Regards
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    • Profile picture of the author asamanthinketh
      Originally Posted by sandalwood View Post

      Here's a quote from your post:

      Life's too short to be living someone's values, opinions and dreams; you're an original.

      Hmmm, methinks you got your values as a youngster. And as you grew up you modified them to fit you. I don't see how you or anyone else is an original. Life may be to short but you do live someone else's values. Proof: If you haven't murdered anyone you are living someone else's values.

      But, you're an original...
      Great perspective, thanks! If you haven't murdered anyone, you're living your own conviction of what you believe to be right or not. Of course, that is influenced to a large extent by what society believes. However, at the end of the day it is your choice and decision to live according to those values. I still maintain, everyone is an original; that they do things similar to what others do, does not necessarily imply that they are same. The soul is unique; if you don't believe it, let's heard to the karaoke bar and sing the same song. You will know the difference for sure! Haha

      You're right again on the fact that we all get most our values from when we're younger and eventually adapt to survive. Yet once again, it is the spirit of the individual that beats all. Similar experiences, different lenses (perspectives), different thoughts and actions.

      Thanks for perspective! Safe
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  • Profile picture of the author Dain Supero
    Just remember to inspire through action rather than influence through words.

    Show, don't tell.

    Lead, don't command.

    A great man understands and accepts the flaws of others and also his own. Only after willful acceptance of a situation can we hope to better it.
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    • Profile picture of the author asamanthinketh
      Originally Posted by Dain Supero View Post

      Just remember to inspire through action rather than influence through words.

      Show, don't tell.

      Lead, don't command.

      A great man understands and accepts the flaws of others and also his own. Only after willful acceptance of a situation can we hope to better it.
      "Show, don't tell", this is the second time I'm hearing this; definitely applying it with my team of bloggers. (e.g. take a picture instead of telling me to find the bug in the top right corner of the page) <--Learned that from a Mind Valley presentation.

      Anyhow, thanks again for your post man. David Deida says "respect your boundaries" and the boundaries of others. That I do always. It is also our responsibility to help them grow their boundaries by masterfully guiding them into the realization of the their own inner power.

      You can check our his book "the way of the superior man", it's a really great read.

      Best regards.
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  • Profile picture of the author bobandnanci
    Drawing a line in the sand and not allowing others to step over the boundaries of your beliefs and values is commendable. However, we, also, have to respect the boundaries of others, even when we don't believe the way that they do.

    Hitting others over the head with what we believe is right and just and expecting them to cow-tow to our beliefs is insidious. The simple answer is to just walk away from them. They are not the type of person that you want in your circle of influence.

    What I found hardest to read in your post is the way that you handled your little sister and what I am presuming to be anorexia. You seemed thrilled that she bowed to your will and sat quietly at your mother's side.

    As a woman, I find that totally unacceptable. As someone who has dealt with an anorexic before, I find it reprehensible. Get her to a therapist or doctor that deals with anorexia. Or, how about being vulnerable and telling her that what she is doing will kill her and you don't want to lose her? All you have done is driven her into a position where she will have to hide what she is doing and then help may come way too late.
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    • Profile picture of the author Dain Supero
      Originally Posted by bobandnanci View Post

      Drawing a line in the sand and not allowing others to step over the boundaries of your beliefs and values is commendable. However, we, also, have to respect the boundaries of others, even when we don't believe the way that they do.

      Hitting others over the head with what we believe is right and just and expecting them to cow-tow to our beliefs is insidious. The simple answer is to just walk away from them. They are not the type of person that you want in your circle of influence.

      What I found hardest to read in your post is the way that you handled your little sister and what I am presuming to be anorexia. You seemed thrilled that she bowed to your will and sat quietly at your mother's side.

      As a woman, I find that totally unacceptable. As someone who has dealt with an anorexic before, I find it reprehensible. Get her to a therapist or doctor that deals with anorexia. Or, how about being vulnerable and telling her that what she is doing will kill her and you don't want to lose her? All you have done is driven her into a position where she will have to hide what she is doing and then help may come way too late.
      Touché.

      Anorexia or any similar condition exists at a subconscious/self-image level. Such a condition can't be fixed by conscious command and external input. You might succeed at controlling or forcing her into not throwing up this time, but did that really solve the underlying problem. Does the sister now view herself differently? Has her self-image healed? No and no.

      Someone with such a condition has to learn how to view, accept, and then heal her self-image. This is where a therapist comes in.
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  • Profile picture of the author asamanthinketh
    My 8-year old sister does not need a therapist. Thank you.

    She eats fine, does everything fine just like a normal child - african kids rarely have problems with their self-image that compel them to anorexia- and bulimia-type habits.

    Why? I don't know for sure. But less TV could be one of them - the less they watch, the less they inherit negative beliefs of self and what a person should look, be or act like.
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