toilet humour!
> Two Aussie builders, Phil and Eric, are seated either side of a table in a
> rough pub when a well-dressed man enters, orders a beer and sits on a stool
> at the bar. The two builders start to speculate about the occupation of the
> 'suit'.
>
> Phil: - I reckon he's an accountant.
>
> Eric: - No way - he's a stockbroker.
>
> Phil: - He's not a bloody stockbroker! A stockbroker wouldn't come in here!
>
> The argument repeats itself for some time until the volume of beer gets the
> better of Phil and he makes for the toilet. On entering the toilet, he sees
> that the 'suit' is standing at a urinal. Curiosity and the several beers
> get the better of the builder.
>
> Phil: - 'Scuse me... No offence meant, but me and me mate were wondering
> what you do for a living?
>
> Suit: - No offence taken! I'm a Logical Scientist by profession.
>
> Phil: - Oh! What's that then?
>
> Suit: - I'll try to explain by example... Do you have a goldfish at home?
>
> Phil: - Er... mmm. Well yeah, I do as it happens!
>
> Suit: - Well, it's logical to follow that you keep it in a bowl or in a
> pond. Which is it?
>
> Phil: - It's in a pond!
>
> Suit: - Well then it's reasonable to suppose that you have a large garden.
>
> Phil: - As it happens, yes I have got a big garden!
>
> Suit: - Well then it's logical to assume that in this town if you have a
> large garden then you have a large house?
>
> Phil: - As it happens I've got a five-bedroom house...built it myself!
>
> Suit: - Well given that you've built a five-bedroom house it is logical to
> assume that you haven't built it just for yourself and that you are quite
> probably married?
>
> Phil: - Yes I am married, I live with my wife and three children.
>
> Suit: - Well then it is logical to assume that you are sexually active with
> your wife on a regular basis?
>
> Phil:- Yep! Four nights a week!
>
> Suit: - Well then it is logical to suggest that you do not masturbate very
> often?
>
> Phil: - Me? Never!
>
> Suit: - Well there you are! That's logical science at work!
>
> Phil: - How's that then?
>
> Suit: - Well from finding out that you had a goldfish, I've told you about
> your sex life!
>
> Phil: - I see! That's pretty impressive...thanks mate!
>
> Both leave the toilet and Phil returns to his mate...
>
> Eric: - I see the suit was in there. Did you ask him what he does?
>
> Phil: - Yep! He's a logical scientist!
>
> Eric: - What's that then?
>
> Phil: - I'll try and explain. Do you have a goldfish?
>
> Eric: - Nope.
>
> Phil: - Well then, you're a wanker.
Graham
> rough pub when a well-dressed man enters, orders a beer and sits on a stool
> at the bar. The two builders start to speculate about the occupation of the
> 'suit'.
>
> Phil: - I reckon he's an accountant.
>
> Eric: - No way - he's a stockbroker.
>
> Phil: - He's not a bloody stockbroker! A stockbroker wouldn't come in here!
>
> The argument repeats itself for some time until the volume of beer gets the
> better of Phil and he makes for the toilet. On entering the toilet, he sees
> that the 'suit' is standing at a urinal. Curiosity and the several beers
> get the better of the builder.
>
> Phil: - 'Scuse me... No offence meant, but me and me mate were wondering
> what you do for a living?
>
> Suit: - No offence taken! I'm a Logical Scientist by profession.
>
> Phil: - Oh! What's that then?
>
> Suit: - I'll try to explain by example... Do you have a goldfish at home?
>
> Phil: - Er... mmm. Well yeah, I do as it happens!
>
> Suit: - Well, it's logical to follow that you keep it in a bowl or in a
> pond. Which is it?
>
> Phil: - It's in a pond!
>
> Suit: - Well then it's reasonable to suppose that you have a large garden.
>
> Phil: - As it happens, yes I have got a big garden!
>
> Suit: - Well then it's logical to assume that in this town if you have a
> large garden then you have a large house?
>
> Phil: - As it happens I've got a five-bedroom house...built it myself!
>
> Suit: - Well given that you've built a five-bedroom house it is logical to
> assume that you haven't built it just for yourself and that you are quite
> probably married?
>
> Phil: - Yes I am married, I live with my wife and three children.
>
> Suit: - Well then it is logical to assume that you are sexually active with
> your wife on a regular basis?
>
> Phil:- Yep! Four nights a week!
>
> Suit: - Well then it is logical to suggest that you do not masturbate very
> often?
>
> Phil: - Me? Never!
>
> Suit: - Well there you are! That's logical science at work!
>
> Phil: - How's that then?
>
> Suit: - Well from finding out that you had a goldfish, I've told you about
> your sex life!
>
> Phil: - I see! That's pretty impressive...thanks mate!
>
> Both leave the toilet and Phil returns to his mate...
>
> Eric: - I see the suit was in there. Did you ask him what he does?
>
> Phil: - Yep! He's a logical scientist!
>
> Eric: - What's that then?
>
> Phil: - I'll try and explain. Do you have a goldfish?
>
> Eric: - Nope.
>
> Phil: - Well then, you're a wanker.
Graham
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