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And We've ALL Got This To Look Forward To . . .

by positivenegative
12 replies
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The older we get the more funerals we seem to attend. I've been to 12 in the last 18 months. Of course it's because of friends and family/relatives of a similar age group and older (to yourself) reaching the end of their lifespan, or sometimes dying unexpectedly.

Undertakers must do some pretty spectacular work to present a body - sometimes many weeks (or occasionally even months) after death - in a presentable manner for mourners to pay their last respects to, particularly in view of this short but frank article I read in yesterday's paper. The end bit makes for some gruesome bedtime reading. Sleep well.

NOT FOR THE SQUEAMISH!

What happens to the human body after death explained in graphic detail | Metro News
  • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
    Originally Posted by positivenegative View Post

    The older we get the more funerals we seem to attend. I've been to 12 in the last 18 months. Of course it's because of friends and family/relatives of a similar age group and older (to yourself) reaching the end of their lifespan, or sometimes dying unexpectedly.

    Undertakers must do some pretty spectacular work to present a body - sometimes many weeks (or occasionally even months) after death - in a presentable manner for mourners to pay their last respects to, particularly in view of this short but frank article I read in yesterday's paper. The end bit makes for some gruesome bedtime reading. Sleep well.

    NOT FOR THE SQUEAMISH!

    What happens to the human body after death explained in graphic detail | Metro News
    Actually, we don't have to look forward to it at all. Even our spouse won't see it, and we won't know anything about it.
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    • Profile picture of the author yukon
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      Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

      Actually, we don't have to look forward to it at all. Even our spouse won't see it, and we won't know anything about it.
      I'll know.
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    • Profile picture of the author Kurt
      Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

      Actually, we don't have to look forward to it at all. Even our spouse won't see it, and we won't know anything about it.
      Actually, I look forward to seeing it happen to you...


      A quick tip...after you're cremated and someone is paid to scatter your ashes, tell them in advance to make 100% sure there's no wind that day. It would be bad to accidently start a haboob from all your ashes.
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      • Profile picture of the author positivenegative
        Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

        Actually, I look forward to seeing it happen to you...

        A quick tip...after you're cremated and someone is paid to scatter your ashes, tell them in advance to make 100% sure there's no wind that day. It would be bad to accidently start a haboob from all your ashes.

        No problem. I've heard from this Ohio salesman that one of these beauties is great for sucking up ashes.

        Err . . . may be a problem. How can Claude buy one from himself if he's brown bread?


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        • Profile picture of the author yukon
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          Originally Posted by positivenegative View Post

          No problem. I've heard one of these beauties is great for sucking up ashes.

          Err . . . may be a problem. How can Claude buy one from himself if he's brown bread?
          Is that a Hoover?
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          • Profile picture of the author positivenegative
            Originally Posted by yukon View Post

            Is that a Hoover?
            Yes, they both are. Notice the large protruding dust bags on both specimens.
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      • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
        Originally Posted by Kurt View Post

        Actually, I look forward to seeing it happen to you...
        What's amazing to me, is that's about the funniest thing you can say. And I know that new people reading this, will think you are an unabashed Jerk Wad.

        And that thought makes it even funnier.

        Originally Posted by yukon View Post

        Is that a Hoover?
        It's a Riccar. It's my personal Love Robot.
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        • Profile picture of the author Kurt
          Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

          What's amazing to me, is that's about the funniest thing you can say. And I know that new people reading this, will think you are an unabashed Jerk Wad.

          And that thought makes it even funnier.
          And "new people" is the key phrase. After they've been here a short while and get to know you even a little bit, they'll understand my comments regarding you and agree with me.
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  • Profile picture of the author yukon
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    Claude, seriously, what's the markup percentage on the average vacuum cleaner you sell?
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    • Profile picture of the author Zodiax
      Claude doesn't look that fat.

      And I thought the goal of selling vacuums was to train a bunch of other sales people to do the same thing so you could get overrides and become a king pin
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    • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
      Originally Posted by yukon View Post

      Claude, seriously, what's the markup percentage on the average vacuum cleaner you sell?
      It depends entirely on the price at retail.

      A vacuum that you might buy for $99? Wholesale may be $89. A $169 vacuum may cost us $100.

      A vacuum that sells for $600? Maybe half of it is cost. A vacuum that I sell for $1,200, may cost me $500.

      A vacuum cleaner sold in people's home? (Which I don't do anymore) may cost the Factory Direct Distributor $500, and sell for $2,000. And that's what I did for about 30 years. It's the hardest and most profitable selling, I've ever done.

      With most retail, in most industries, the markup is 100%, meaning the product that sells for $200...costs the retailer $100. In Wal-Mart, Target, K-Mart, the markup is a little less.


      Originally Posted by Zodiax View Post

      Claude doesn't look that fat.

      And I thought the goal of selling vacuums was to train a bunch of other sales people to do the same thing so you could get overrides and become a king pin
      Not in a retail store, which is what I own now.
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      • Profile picture of the author positivenegative
        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

        With most retail, in most industries, the markup is 100%, meaning the product that sells for $200....costs the retailer $100.
        97% of WF users thank you for explaining the maths on that.
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