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Showerthoughts: If I forget my password it means my past self has outwitted my present self

by Joe Mobley
12 replies
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When I was in high school, I was jealous of everyone dating a college student. Then I went to college and met the kind of people who date high schoolers.

If someone makes a joke in a dream, your brain came up with that joke.

The first woman to ever have twins must have been really confused.

The makers of Groundhog Day should announce a sequel and then re-release the original with nothing changed at all

If you kill an exact clone of yourself, is it murder or suicide?


/r/Showerthoughts


Joe Mobley
  • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
    If you are in a space ship, traveling at the speed of light...and you run from the back of the ship to the front...how fast were you going?
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    • Profile picture of the author Frank Donovan
      Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

      If you are in a space ship, traveling at the speed of light...and you run from the back of the ship to the front...how fast were you going?
      Or if you were at the front of the spaceship and someone at the back shone a flashlight at you, would you ever see that light?
      .
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    • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
      Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

      If you are in a space ship, traveling at the speed of light...and you run from the back of the ship to the front...how fast were you going?
      You would be going faster than the speed of light.
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      • Profile picture of the author Mike Anthony
        Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

        You would be going faster than the speed of light.
        So that does mean that I would go back in time to join myself in the back of the ship? and if I did that enough would the weight of all those me's slow down the ship so we all could disembark?

        Good thing Claude can't run.
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  • Profile picture of the author Rongg
    According to a box of mac and cheese I am a family of 4...
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    • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
      If the Sweeper Store had a delivery of 13 fresh jam filled dounuts and Claude had 4 employees, how many dounuts would they each not get?
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      • Profile picture of the author Joe Mobley
        Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

        If the Sweeper Store had a delivery of 13 fresh jam filled dounuts and Claude had 4 employees, how many dounuts would they each not get?

        None.


        Claude would "test" all 13.


        And blame some mystery cat out back.


        Joe Mobley
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      • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
        Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

        If the Sweeper Store had a delivery of 13 fresh jam filled dounuts and Claude had 4 employees, how many dounuts would they each not get?
        It's a trick question. Employees don't eat donuts. Employees eat gruel.
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        • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
          Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

          It's a trick question. Employees don't eat donuts. Employees eat gruel.
          Yes Mr Bumble and I'm sure your employees make it more palatable with the Peanuts you pay them.
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          • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
            Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

            Yes Mr Bumble and I'm sure your employees make it more palatable with the Peanuts you pay them.

            This isn't true. Claude is the only one on his payroll who doesn't get paid what he's worth.
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            Raising a child is akin to knowing you're getting fired in 18 years and having to train your replacement without actively sabotaging them.

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            • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
              Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

              This isn't true. Claude is the only one on his payroll who doesn't get paid what he's worth.
              Yes I do. Unfortunately, I haven't taken a paycheck in years.....

              Hey! Wait a minute.....
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  • Profile picture of the author outlawdawg
    Who cares - enjoy the space ship ride.
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    Brian
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